


Worth the Wait

by Diablotsy



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Drama, Fluff, Keeping hope, M/M, Slow Burn, Sort Of, finding each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:27:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 46,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23065465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diablotsy/pseuds/Diablotsy
Summary: Life hasn't been easy on Lucas and when he was left alone his only solution was to keep going, hoping something will come shake his life. Something did but not something he had expected or wanted.It's not always easy to explain why you still look 18 when most people around you grow old and live their lives normally. So Lucas doesn't tell. He keeps it for himself that he hasn't found his soulmate yet and so couldn't age. It's 2019, Lucas decides to go back to university, looking 18 and fitting in the crowd just right. The problem? Lucas was born in 1951.
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Comments: 85
Kudos: 220





	1. Stuck in the same place

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> After my last soulmate AU I promised I'd write another one and it took almost a year but I'm back!  
> Compared to the first one, this one is twice as long in terms of chapter and four times as long in terms of words so I hope you'll enjoy it. I really put a lot of work in this story and am excited to finally be able to show it to you!
> 
> 9 chapters out of 10 are already written and it will have weekly updates, on weekends. Unless you're extra nice and deserve one earlier... (What? Bribing readers already?!)
> 
> You can find me [here](https://diablots.tumblr.com/) if you want to discuss! I'd love to hear from you.
> 
> Without further ado, I'll leave the space for the chapter. Don't hesitate leaving comments and kudos if you liked it :)

Lucas had been 10 when one of his classmates explained the concept of soulmate to him. When he asked his parents why they never talked about it, his father grew angry and dismissed him in his room. It was always scary when his father was mad, it was normal for him to be slapped or receive a spanking in such situations or when he misbehaved. Lucas hated the feeling of his father's hands on him but what he truly couldn’t take was the look of helplessness of his mom. So he did his best not to get his father angry. When Lucas understood soulmate was a sour subject, he didn’t talk about it anymore. Not at home at least. He continued talking about it with Yann, his best friend, to understand the whole concept better.

Lucas had been 12 when he understood why his father was angry. His parents weren’t aging. Yann told him that you grew up until you were 18 and then stopped aging until you found your soulmate. At which point you grew old with them.

His parents looked young, too young to have a kid of his age. Once he realised this, he also started noticing the adults whispering as they looked at him. They pitied him for having parents who aren’t soulmates. Truth was, his dad did look older than 18, young but older. He didn’t understand any of it because it didn’t make sense.

One day, he dared asking his mom the questions that had been going on in his mind. He wished he hadn’t though, because once he got the answers, he felt sorry for the man he slowly started to despise. His mom told him that his father’s soulmate died. They had met quite early and started aging together until they were 24 and she died in a car crash. His mom and him had met later on and fell in love, not a soulmate love but enough to raise a child. But the age they looked like didn’t matter, his mom had said, all Lucas had to remember was that he had two loving parents.

As he grew up and noticed the world, Lucas realised aging was considered good. People would be proud of their grey hair, some would get surgery to look old and pretend they had a beautiful marriage. Old people were what you’d dream to become. But meeting your soulmate wasn’t easy. Yes, you’d start aging when you meet them but you could wait a long time until it happened and you wouldn’t notice it straight away.

It wasn’t rare to stay young until later, that’s why people lived seemingly longer even without it being obvious in their looks. He heard the record was 500 years, someone held on to the idea of their soulmate for so long, that they went through five centuries before meeting them. Other people live their lives and decide to ask for medicine help to die when they lose hope of meeting their soulmate.

The general belief though, was that everyone was to meet their soulmate eventually, which explained why it was rare to raise kids without being soulmates. Although it seemed quite impossible to find one particular person, records showed that it was rare for people to live over 100 years old when they hadn’t met their soulmate and 120 when they had. Every time he thought about that, Lucas’ heart would beat faster, knowing that someone will be there for him. It also made his heart ache at the thought that his mom didn’t have the possibility to meet hers.

Lucas had been 17 when he witnessed the events of May 1968, in front of their TV, a luxury they could afford thanks to his father’s job. At the beginning there were students, barely older than he was, manifesting against the government and then workers joined them. “It’s forbidden to forbid!” they were chanting, “Be realistic, ask for the impossible!” They were against the president’s way of ruling the country, they wanted freedom and not the traditional institutions anymore. They were free to talk, free to walk and free to protest.

“Those young people don’t understand the chance they have. They’ll all end up homeless. What we have now, that’s prosperity.” Lucas’ father had decreed before getting up to turn the TV off.

Lucas somehow agreed with his father. There was no point in protesting anyway, the president was safe in his office. No matter how many people chanted, it wouldn’t change a thing unless they started cutting heads like they did during the revolution. But even then it had taken hundreds of years until they found proper peace again.

When Lucas turned 18, his father started asking when he’d brought a fine lady home. Lucas would dismiss him by saying he focused on his studies first.

When he was 20, Lucas understood that if he wasn’t going to bring a lady, it was because he was gay.

He didn’t accept it until he was 21. It was his last year of university and his father joked with him that he should enjoy it while it last. He had guessed that, if Lucas didn’t bring girls back home, it was because he was too busy going from one flower to the other.

“A young man has to enjoy his freedom,” he had said one time, “but once you work, you gotta find a woman. A good one, who can stay at home and take care of your kids.”

His father was worried because women these days wanted to free themselves, especially since the events of 1968. They were having casual sex, calling it freedom of love, and they weren’t necessarily looking for a good man to marry but one to love.

Lucas knew this was all just in his father’s mind. He knew that women, just like men, had a desire of meeting their soulmate before 1968 and maybe now more than ever. But his father seemed to have forgotten such a concept existed. Or he was purposefully avoiding it.

Lucas was 22, just out of university when he found a job. He had pursued economic studies just like his father had wanted him to. Lucas wanted to do biology but this didn’t mean anything. Medical studies or law would have brought good money and a lasting career, but his son wasn’t smart enough for that. He was good in maths though, so it had been economy. Lucas joined an insurance firm where he was in charge of analysing the market and the future evolution of it.

He had been almost 23 when his father introduced him to a girl, Chloé. She seemed nice and still looked 18 just like him. His father assured him she wouldn’t make any problem. She came from a good family that he knew from his job. They married just a year later.

Lucas had nothing to complain about. He had a good and stable job, a beautiful wife, parents who loved each other despite not being soulmates. It should be a sign that Chloé and him could work just fine but it wasn’t enough. Lucas wished sometimes that he’d wake up with slowly growing grey hair realising he had been wrong, he wasn’t gay and he could pursue happiness with Chloé. But he couldn’t lie to himself and Chloé was smart, he couldn’t lie to her either.

It’s only three years later, in 1977, that his alright but not great life came crumbling down. Chloé and Lucas went to his parents for Christmas but Lucas could sense something was off. His mom talked even less than usual and his father kept casting angry looks at Chloé. It wasn’t a surprise though, he didn’t like her anymore.

She, who seemed to be a girl from a good traditional family, was actually a progressive woman. She had wanted to work and to have her driving licence. She said she could stop working to take care of the kids when they were babies but she wouldn’t stop longer than a year. Lucas had nothing against it and his father was even angrier at him for that.

“You still haven’t knocked her up.” His father commented.

Lucas didn’t say anything, out of respect for his father, but he didn’t miss Chloé’s angry look when he didn’t correct the way his father talked about her. Could Lucas be blamed though? He didn’t want to cause a scene at Christmas. If he was being honest, there was only one person he wouldn’t let anyone talk badly about, it was his mom. He’d get angry for her.

“Your mother can’t live here anymore.” Later that evening his father let the information out as if he had read his son’s mind. “She’s sick, she can’t handle herself and less alone a house. She’s going to a hospital. They’ll take care of her.”

In a world where women started having more rights and gaining freedom, his father was still using his marriage to do anything he wanted to a woman who hadn’t asked for anything. It got too much when Lucas realised he had been supporting it for years without saying anything.

“Fuck you.” Lucas let out. He bit his tongue hard the moment the words were out but there was no turning back now.

“Excuse me?”

“Fuck you.” This time he said it louder, and directly looking at him. “You have no rights to decide that on your own, let mom talk for herself. And you have no rights to decide of my life either. You want to know why Chloé still isn’t pregnant? I’m gay. Yes, your son is a fag. Get that? See how great your life is! Your son won’t cooperate anymore and you’re too frustrated you lost your soulmate early on that you couldn’t be anything else than a coward and an asshole.”

Before he could continue, his father yelled at him to get out. Lucas got up and looked at his mother.

“Mom, come on.” Chloé was standing beside him but his mother wouldn’t move. “Mom. Mom…” He repeated, his voice getting quieter.

His father grinned and took that opportunity to put a hand on the back of her neck. “At least she knows her place and doesn’t disrespect me.”

Lucas gulped to repress the tears gathered in his eyes already and finally left when Chloé dragged him by the hand.

Just before they closed the door they heard. “Don’t you dare come back here, this isn’t your home anymore.”

It was silent between Chloé and him all the way back home. It was rare for her to be behind the wheel when they were both in the car but Lucas wasn’t able to drive right now.

When they got home, Lucas sat down on the couch and stayed stoic looking ahead of him. It was only when Chloé rubbed his back that he let out a sob. He started crying for that night, for his mom and for all those years he hadn’t cried when he let his father dictate their lives. “I’m sorry.” He chocked out at some point but Chloé didn’t mind, she was smart and she knew a day like this was to come eventually.

Lucas and Chloé divorced the next year. Still both looking like 18 but being 27, they knew they had much more to explore not being together.

It was out of curiosity that Lucas went to a gay bar one day. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for but he immediately knew that wasn’t it. It was tacky, people were barely dressed and all those clichés he heard about were true. He didn’t want to be part of this world. He wasn’t one of them, but he wasn’t one of the heterosexual either. He was lost.

So he went back to his everyday life, only without his parents and without a wife. It’s not long after, that he heard the rumours of gay cancer. A sexual disease no one had heard of, that no one could cure and that mostly touched gay men. AIDS. There was no way he would explore this side of him anymore when there were chances of him dying because of it.

At first Lucas thought his outburst with his father would lead him to a better life but it didn’t, he was still stuck in the same place he had been before, just relieved that he didn’t have to find excuses as to why he couldn’t keep it up when his wife was there naked and tempting.

A lot of things happened in ten years. It was now 1990 and he was still in his sorry ass job but he learned Chloé had found the right one and started aging. He also got in contact with Yann again, who still looked as fresh as him. It seemed like fate had decided to play both of them dirty, but then again, Lucas couldn’t really complain when he wasn’t out there searching for anyone. He looked 18 but he felt old, older than he was even. He was tired of his life. It seemed like everything around him moved and changed. The 80’s has been a particularly changing decade, but he was still the same, stuck in the early 70’s influenced by his father’s way of thinking.

Yann was probably the only thing keeping him young somehow. But with 1990 came something new and revolutionary, maybe even more than the TV, the washing machine or the vacuum: Internet. Everyone spoke about how it was now possible to communicate with anyone, anywhere. How you could answer any question anytime without the need of an encyclopaedia. It seemed futuristic and yet it was there.

For Lucas it didn’t mean much. Why would he be interested in talking to anybody from the other side of the world? Why would he need to have the answer to stupid questions such as how many teeth a shark has? Internet only worried him because it meant his work was going to change. If the world grew closer together he’d have to analyse the market differently. He was already tired of this job but knowing he had to learn new ways of doing it didn’t enchant him.

Yann tried telling him it was a good opportunity to learn something else, to bring some excitement in his professional life but Lucas was stubborn and liked the fact that he didn’t have to think too much. Doing what he was good at was enough and learning something new brought nothing but hassle.

He hadn’t been wrong because soon enough there was a computer in his office and he had to learn how to use it. It turns out Yann had been right, even though he wouldn’t admit it. Having some part of newness did sparkle something in him. It wasn’t much and some might find it ridiculous but it brought a much needed change in his monotonous life. This new decade and the ones following would be synonym of change even though Lucas didn’t know that yet.

In May 1997, Lucas received a phone call he never thought he’d receive.

“Lucas Lallemant?” The voice asked and when he said it was him it continued. “I’m sorry to announce you this but your father passed away.”

It left him speechless. He hadn’t heard about his parents in a long time and although some part of him knew it would happen eventually, he preferred not to think about it. It had been his wish, he learned then. His father had asked for medical help because he had no reason to live anymore. Lucas wondered for a second if he should do that too. Because his life looked unappealing: he worked, went back home, slept and then went to work again. Sometimes he went out with Yann. If it wasn’t for him, Lucas would have gone crazy already.

“Lucas? My little boy.” He hadn’t heard his mom’s voice in twenty years and these few words had been enough to bring him to tears. With the news of his dad being buried, he took contact with his mom. The only reason Lucas decided to go to the burial was because she asked him to. It had been years since his father sent her away and yet she cried about losing him. But Lucas was here so she said it was going to be alright.

This was the first thing that changed in his life: getting to know his mom again. It was weird thinking of her as his mom when they both looked physically young. If you knew where to look though you could see how life had impacted both of them.

Lucas learned what happened to her during those twenty years and immediately decided to help her. She had been placed in a renowned hospital back then but which actually still worked like they did in the sixties. Mental illnesses weren’t considered as real illnesses and so she was just treated as a crazy woman. She wasn’t, she just needed help and the little boy in Lucas hated himself for letting this whole thing happen.

She couldn’t live alone though so Lucas found her the best home where she could stay, one which would provide her with good care. After that, he went to visit her every week, apologizing every time for what he let happen and every time his mom would dismiss it and say she was just happy that he was here now.

He found some balance in his life, a light that had disappeared since that night he left his parent’s place in 1977. Much to Yann’s pleasure, he started being Lucas again. Lucas didn’t know what Yann had meant by these words because his friend had known him either like the shadow of himself or as a kid but he knew he meant it in a positive way. He still didn’t like his job and he still went through a boring routine but there were some moments in his week which brought him joy.

If he had aged, he would have looked 49 when the new century came, with it a lot of fright and excitement. It had been Lucas’ idea to go down the streets of Paris on that evening. At eight in the evening people started gathering in Yann’s flat. People Lucas knew but couldn’t consider friends seeing how little they saw each other. There was one guy however, a colleague of Yann’s, who attracted Lucas’ attention more than the others: Nicolas. Maybe it was because every time he looked at him, the guy winked or smiled. Maybe it was how he seemed utterly normal and yet detached himself from the crowd. Or maybe it was because he knew for a fact that guy was gay and that he was one of the few he had met who didn’t look extravagant.

Around 11 pm Lucas decided they should go out. Going into the new century was a big event and they had the chance to celebrate it at the Eiffel Tower! Hundreds of people had had the same idea, some apparently celebrated there since the beginning of the evening.

It was 11:59:30 on the 31st December 1999, people were cheering, it was overcrowded, Lucas wasn’t even sure if Yann was around anymore or if he had lost him in the crowd. It didn’t matter because the monument was already illuminated and his eyes were bright like they were when he saw fireworks as a kid.

10, 9, 8, 7… 3, 2, 1

And the Eiffel Tower started glowing even more, the firework started, illuminating the sky and transporting all of the Parisians in another world, one where time had stopped and all that mattered was the beauty in front of them. Lucas felt a hand on his shoulder, it was Nicolas who smiled at him before pressing soft lips against his. Lucas inhaled sharply, surprised, but was quick to return the kiss. Fireworks all around him, people cheering and lips against his, Lucas would have happily stopped time to stay here forever.

“Happy New Year.” Nicolas said against his lips.

“Happy New Century.” Lucas replied before kissing him again.

This thing between Lucas and Nicolas didn’t last. They didn’t want the same thing, Lucas didn’t even know what he wanted and it turns out they just weren’t made for each other. Still, it opened Lucas to a completely different world. One where being gay didn’t mean being half naked, provocative or acting like a girl. Lucas could now imagine reconcile being himself and gay, he could meet people with the same interest as him. He also learned a lot about AIDS, that he shouldn’t be as afraid of it. Sure it couldn’t be cured and there were a lot of deaths but you could prevent it and scientists were actively searching for better ways to fight the illness. Talking about it with Yann helped too. The both of them, along with the help of Internet, learned a lot of stuff related to gays and other people. It was as if Lucas had been cut from a whole part of the world which could have accepted him as he was. Even though he wasn’t ready to advocate for all rights, he’d learned to accept that part of himself and wasn’t angry anymore at something he couldn’t control.

Years went by and things were being good. Lucas visited his mom, went out with Yann and had some short or longer stories with guys. It never lasted though because neither started growing old and Lucas didn’t want to hold someone back or to be held back like it happened to his mom. His job changed with the growth of technology but he was still doing the same thing. All in all, Lucas’ life was better than it had been in a while.

One Saturday he was walking with his mom. They both loved walking around with no clear destination.

“So how are you doing, Lucas?” His mom asked at one point.

“I’m good. I mean not much news to talk about, I would have told you otherwise.”

“Yeah, of course you would have. So much changed these last years though and yet I feel like nothing really changed.”

“What do you mean?” Lucas wondered

“You’re still doing what your dad made you do.” And okay, that hurts, Lucas had to admit. “You’ve been away for so long and now he’s gone but you still follow his steps. I know working for an insurance firm isn’t what you wanted to do. Why didn’t you change?”

It was clear for Lucas why he didn’t do it. He had nothing to hold on to at first but since his father died, he had to be there for his mom. “I need to pay for my flat,” he said, “and everything else.” He stayed vague, he didn’t want his mom to think he was doing this only for her.

His mom simply smiled. “You know you’d be allowed money if you stopped working for a while. You’ve been working for more than 40 years. You could ask for help and go back to university.”

Lucas shook his head. “I’m fine as I am, you know. It doesn’t matter.”

It was silent for a while, not a comfortable one but one where you feel the other has to say something. Eventually, she started again. “I feel like you’re doing it for me. You don’t have to use your money on that fancy room, you know.”

“You deserve everything I couldn’t give you earlier mom.” Lucas simply dismissed he with a shrug and a smile.

At the end of the day, when Lucas said goodbye to his mom, she hugged him tight and whispered how much she loved him.

It’s only two days later, on the 12th May 2019 that Lucas received the worst call of his long life. “Mister Lallemant? Your mom passed away last night.”

_My beautiful boy,_

_Don’t cry._

_I know what you’re thinking but our conversation a few days ago has nothing to do with my decision. I’ve taken it a while ago and didn’t tell you because I know you wouldn’t have let me do it. The truth is, I feel old. I may not look like it but I’ve had had a long life and feel like I don’t belong anymore. The world is moving on and I didn’t catch the train. I stayed stuck in the last century and I’ve long ago lost the hope of finding my soulmate. It was my time._

_Please, don’t let that happen to you. Live, my boy, you can still experience so many things. Seek out your soulmate, you deserve it more than anyone. Start your studies again. You used to love learning, making experiments was your thing when you were a kid. I’m sure you can connect to it again. Or to something else. But don’t find yourself stuck in a situation you don’t like. Remember it’s never too late._

_I will always love you._

_Mom_

“They said the procedure takes at least three weeks.” Lucas said to Yann who had just finished reading the letter. “She’s been planning this for three weeks, how come I didn’t notice she was planning to kill herself?!”

“I’m sorry Lucas.” Yann said quietly as he put the paper down on the table again. He didn’t want to say something wrong, he was sure Lucas would realise his mom’s point of view once he’d have calmed down. Instead, he pulled Lucas in a tight hug. He didn’t count how many times he had hugged him in the last three days, since they learned the death of Mrs Lallemant.

Just like Lucas had been there for Yann when his parents died, Yann was there too. Lucas spoke a few words at the burial but he wanted to keep his relationship with his mom to himself. After that he’s had a period where he wondered what he should do. He considered asking for help to end his life too because now that his mom wasn’t there anymore what was the point? But then he thought about Yann and realised he couldn’t do that to him. They had been in this together for so long, for a second he even wondered if Yann was his soulmate but it couldn’t be, they weren’t aging and he definitely didn’t love him that way.

One morning, he sat down at the piano in his living room. He had started playing again when he and his mom reconnected. She was the one who taught him.

He played for a good few hours, letting his thoughts wander as his fingers ran on the piano knowing the music by heart. After the last note of his mom’s favourite music, Lucas opened his eyes and stared at the wall in front of him. He had to go back to university.


	2. Trying to fit in

“No Lucas, I’m not going back to school with you.”

~~~~

Three months later, at the start of the school year, both Lucas and Yann stood in front of one of the buildings of their university.

“Remind me why I’m doing this?” Yann wondered.

“Because you love me.” Lucas just answered, shrugging, as if it was obvious. “Come on, we’re gonna be late.”

After his mom’s death, Lucas decided to go back to university and study something he actually enjoys. It had been weirdly easy to join a biology course considering he hadn’t studied it before but he couldn’t do this alone which led him to asking Yann to come along. He had been difficult to convince but, in the end, Lucas somehow managed.

Yann, on the other hand, decided to take the English for Business course. He figured it wouldn’t hurt to get better in a foreign language and he also wanted to pick something that wouldn’t be too hard. It wasn’t his idea to go back to school after all.

For Lucas, this was all meant to give his life a second chance. Maybe he would fit better in this generation, no matter how different from others he felt now. For Yann though, it was all fun and games. He even mentioned soulmates along the way. Maybe they will finally find their significant other.

It’s not that they hadn’t had adventures before. Yann had had a fair amount of serious relationships. They all ended eventually but not as badly as one could have expected. He’s always found mature people who dealt with the situation in a correct way. Lucas hadn’t, the few adventures he’s had hadn’t lasted more than two weeks.

That might also come from the fact that Lucas hadn’t been looking around for that long. When Yann had been looking around for decades, Lucas only fully accepted being gay twenty years ago. It didn’t matter anyway because he somehow felt like he couldn’t fall too hard for someone who wasn’t the one.

But no matter what Yann had said, Lucas hardly believed he could find his soulmate on campus. Even though people could look young without actually being 18, it was rare for them to go back to class. Most people around here were barely out of high school and, if anything, they had to be under thirty years old, not around sixty. Lucas was certain that soulmates were supposed to be more or less the same age which is why chances of finding them here were beyond ridiculous.

A door slammed shut and Lucas was brutally brought back to real life and out of his daydreaming. The teacher of his first class just arrived, he looked like he was in his forties but who knew how old he actually was. There were a good hundred people in this class, all looking lost. It seemed fair, considering university was presented as being different than high school. And yet, in Lucas’ experience, it was somehow the same. He couldn’t really talk about this generation though, he hadn’t followed how studying had evolved since he had been in class in the early 80’s. Just to enter this course, he had to give the administration so many papers it had given him a headache. Did joining university really became that much of a hassle? He gave them the benefit of the doubt as it might be because his situation was unusual.

The teacher started speaking and everyone became silent. “Good morning. I’m Mr. Duval, your teacher in general biology for this semester and director of this course. My class will give you a general overview of biology through different thematic you can come across in this field. It will help you choose different options in semester two. Please, be aware that, by then, half of you will have dropped. I don’t expect all of you to understand the subject and keep up with the rhythm. Thus I won’t bother remembering your names for now. If you choose my specialty in semester two, though, that will be another story.” He looked around with a slight grin almost as if he was amused by the students’ worried faces. “Now, about biology...”

Lucas dozed off for a bit. He hadn’t missed teachers like him who thought they were better and had fun making students uncomfortable. Lucas also kept reminding himself that half of them wouldn’t be there anymore in a few months. He gave a quick look around and wondered who didn’t look like they belonged in a biology class. Lucas didn’t for sure. He had been away from the school system for so long it would only make sense for him not to be able to follow. But he couldn’t do that, couldn’t let himself think that way. He was doing this for his mom and he would succeed. With that, he gave his full attention to the teacher in front of him.

~~~~

It was on the second week after classes started that Yann told Lucas to join him in the school cafeteria for lunch. It wasn’t unusual for them to see each other when they had the same break at lunch but what surprised him was that Yann was already sitting with two other guys this time.

Lucas took a hesitant step back. This wasn’t what he had expected, why was his best friend having lunch with other people? He thought Yann was repulsed about the idea of going back to university, that he only did it to please Lucas and now he was going around, making friends?

Finally walking to the table, Lucas put his tray down at the empty place in front of Yann. His friend immediately smiled at him. “Lucas, hey! Good to see you. Come on, sit down, I need to introduce you.”

Without a word, Lucas took his jacket off and sat down, looking at the two guys next to them. The one sitting right next to Lucas was looking at him with curiosity and the one across, next to Yann, wore glasses and had a wide smile plastered on his face. “Lucas, this is Basile and Arthur. Basile is in my course and Arthur is a close friend of him.”

As if that opened a gate, the both of them greeted him excitedly. Between the “hi”, “nice to meet you”, “Yann talks about you all the time”, Lucas managed to hear. “It’s always good to meet another grandpa.”

“Baz!” Arthur immediately interfered as Lucas turned to Yann with wide eyes. They had both agreed not to talk about their age to people there. He didn’t have time to say anything when Arthur continued speaking, to him this time. “It’s all good, man, we know Yann promised not to tell but if you trust him the way I trust Basile you’d know he wouldn’t have done it without being sure it was okay.”

Lucas was at a loss of words. He nodded slightly and glanced at Yann when he said. “Yeah, I guess.” But Yann knew better and he understood with Lucas’ look that he would hear about it later.

The conversation continued as if nothing happened, Lucas didn’t exactly speak much but he had to admit those two guys were fun to be around. After Yann glanced at him one too many times, Lucas mouthed “We’re good.” The smile it brought to Yann’s lips was enough to make him smile as well.

Eventually, Arthur’s gaze dozed off and, seconds later, he was moving his hands in weird gestures. Lucas frowned but neither Yann or Basile found it weird. He turned around to look where Arthur was looking at. It was two people and they were gesturing back to him.

“Right, I need to go.” Arthur said as he got up.

“Wait, what was that?” Lucas interrupted him. At Arthur’s confused expression, Lucas continued. “The hand thing?”

“Oh that? Sign language.” He explained and turned his head. Arthur tapped his ear and Lucas noticed a small electronic device in it which he hadn’t noticed before. “Quite a useful language when you’re deaf.” He looked over to where the two others were waiting. “Okay, I really need to go. It was nice meeting you. See you later, guys!” And with that he left.

“Oh. Wow, I’m so-.” It was all Lucas could say before Basile stopped him and they watched Arthur walk away.

“Don’t say you’re sorry. It happened at the beginning of the year.” Basile explained. “Took him a while to accept it… But here he is.” A hand on his heart and a false sob escaping his lips, he continued. “My baby grew up so fast.”

“Too much, Baz, too much.” Yann said with a laugh.

This led to Basile pointing a finger at him with an angry look. “Nothing is too much for Arthur.” If anything, it just made them laugh harder, Basile joining them quickly. Yeah, maybe Yann found the right people to become friends with after all.

~~~~

The days and weeks after that went on pretty smoothly, if Lucas had to comment. He was actually doing okay in most of his classes. He was a bit behind in English, because for some reason they had to learn that language too, but other than that he was an average student. The number of people in his course had already dropped but Mr. Duval was still insufferable, if that guy knew Lucas could be almost twice his age he’d show some respect.

His face dropped when Lucas realised his thought, he sounded just like his dad. That teacher knew more than him about biology and has been teaching for years. No matter how older Lucas was, it didn’t mean he was better than him.

Still, he didn’t like the guy.

He and Yann had become good friends with Arthur and Basile and somehow they had become the “gang”, named by Basile. But sometimes Lucas felt a bit left out. None of it was his friends’ fault though, it was all on him. He was the one saying no to going out, to joining parties, to skipping class in order to enjoy one of the last sunny days before winter. All in all, Lucas felt stuck in his past habits. He didn’t manage to integrate himself in this generation and didn’t get involved in it. He went to classes, had lunch with the gang, sometimes they hung out at Yann’s place but he still kept Arthur and Basile at bay. They were just close enough but far away from really knowing him.

One evening, when Yann was at his place, he went on to that subject.

“You know, Arthur and Basile, they’re really nice. I didn’t expect to find such interesting youngsters when you convinced me to go back to school. It’s great fun actually.” Basile and Arthur had fun calling them grandpas so Yann didn’t hesitate on calling them all kind of different names describing young people.

Lucas shrugged slightly. “Yeah, I guess. I mean, it’s mostly studying but it’s always a good laugh to be with them.”

Yann grunted when he heard that. “Ugh, even my grandpa sounded cooler than you.”

“Rude!” Lucas interfered, smacking Yann’s arm.

“No but it’s true. You’re taking this way too seriously. I mean, I get it, you want your degree. But during the first year of uni you’re supposed to discover life and-”

“We’ve already discovered life.” Lucas cut him in the middle of his sentence.

“Let me finish.” Yann warned. “They’re discovering life. And I know we’ve been to uni already but this is a whole different century. I’ve been discovering something unlike what we’ve known when we were studying, it’s crazy how much it changed, being young. It’s making me wonder if we shouldn’t have held to this youth rather than grow old in our minds. It would have been fun to be young in each different decade. We’d know so much.”

As if Lucas needed to be reminded of how old they actually are and that he had let life take over him rather than control it. “Yeah well, you do you. I want to have my degree.”

“To do what? Have a bachelor with an old mind? Do you realise that when you get that degree and go on to look for a job you’ll be against young minded people who are ready to change the world? I’m not sure an old soul from the 80’s will be the preferred choice of companies. And okay, let’s imagine you get a job, you go back to working and going home again to go to work again and go home again? I thought you wanted a second chance. You’re just repeating the same thing than before, only in biology instead of economics.”

It hurt to hear that, probably because it was way too close to reality. Yann was wrong, it wasn’t exactly the same, but Lucas would be a fool if he denied all of what Yann said. It was a repeating pattern.

When Yann saw that Lucas got lost in his thoughts again, he snapped his fingers in front if his eyes, to stop him from going too deep. “Come on, I can’t believe that in all those years you still haven’t learned to talk to me when something is bothering you.”

Lucas sighed but admitted that Yann was right. “I’m just wondering what my mom meant when she told me to go back to school. If she wanted me to just go back and have my degree or if she would have wanted me to live the full experience.”

Lucas couldn’t seem to find an answer so Yann gave it to him. “I just know that she would have wanted you to be happy. Are you?”

The answer didn’t come straight away. It’s like when someone asks you how you are in the morning. Some people don’t want a real answer, they just want the social interaction so you answer “good” even when you’re not. However, Lucas knew he couldn’t do that with Yann so he had to think through. He had an amazing flat, was studying a subject he liked, had good friends but… “No.” The last time he felt truly happy had been during the 2000s when he was still rediscovering time with his mom and discovering himself.

“Then do something, try to find your happiness.” Yann suggested. “I don’t have a magic formula but you could start by trying to fit in? Maybe that’s it. And if it’s not then we’ll try something else. I’ll help you.”

“And how do you plan to do that exactly?” He wondered.

“Well, first, we’re going to get you a PS4.”

Lucas raised an eyebrow at him. “Since when are you interested in video games?”

“I’ve always been.” Yann told him. “And game nights with the guys only enhanced that. It’s always fun nights. And you need to get better at those games before you can play with us. Old man.” Yann teased him, nudging his shoulder. Lucas just laughed at that comment, Yann truly was the best of friends.

~~~~

The next time they went out, on Thursday, Yann didn’t give Lucas any choice. They were planning, with Arthur and Basile, to go to the bar and have a few drinks. True it was during the week but with the discussion they had recently, Yann wasn’t going to let him say no again. That’s how they all ended up sitting down at a table, a beer each, chitchatting.

“No but I mean, I don’t know if it’s her, if she’s the one. I hoped she was but now we’re not together anymore even though I still feel things for her. And we’re still too young to realise if we’re aging or not.” Arthur had just explained to them a complicated story that happened between him and a friend from high school, Alexia.

“Daphné, I’m sure she’s the one, aging or not. Things are just too great with her.” Basile interfered.

Hearing those stories, Lucas really wondered why it was so difficult for Yann and him to find some stability when they had been around for so long. Those two teenagers almost had more to tell than Lucas does.

“Wait.” Lucas was confused, Arthur’s words sticking in his mind. “What do you mean, you’re too young to know?”

“Ah yeah I see. No wonder you haven’t met your soulmate yet, you don’t even know a thing about them.” Arthur pointed out.

“Yeah well, I wasn’t exactly looking for any information nor had a way to do that. It’s not like libraries have lots of books about it.”

“Well what about Goog-. Yeah right, generation difference and all that. Okay, everything I know is from Internet or people talking, so I don’t know how much of it is true but it’s what people believe. When you meet your soulmate early in life, you both age slowly, as if you never stopped aging, kinda? So it just goes on gradually. But if you’ve been waiting for a long time, like you, for instance, there would be some sign that shows you’re clearly aging. It would be wrinkles, white hair and such. We don’t exactly know why, I think it’s so you don’t stay too blind to the situation. But you still get around fifty years with them after that.” Arthur explained.

“And, what if one of them is young and the other old?” Basile wondered, not directly asking Arthur.

Lucas had to admit that what Arthur said made sense, but Basile’s next question didn’t, according to him. “That’s not a thing.” Lucas intervened. “I mean, it’d be weird to have a soulmate who’s technically, what, 20, 30 years younger than you? Soulmates are more or less the same age.”

“I wouldn’t mind if mine was younger. I mean, if it’s meant to be then whatever, it’ll be good.” Yann explained.

Arthur seemed to be thinking but no one else had anything to say about it. Lucas was still very much convinced that he wouldn’t be able to fall for someone younger. He pictured falling for someone from his class and shook his head. “No way.”

Suddenly Basile smacked Lucas’ arm. Lucas turned to look at him “That hurt.” It didn’t. But Basile didn’t reply, he was just staring in front of him toward the bar. “Lucas, that guy was definitely checking you out.”

Yann and Arthur turned around right away to look over at the bar which made Lucas roll his eyes. “Discretion is really your thing, isn’t it?” He asked rhetorically before turning to Basile. “No he wasn’t. He’s probably just wondering why you’re making so much noise.”

“No, I swear, it was you. Come on, he’s cute. Why won’t you ask him out?” Basile insisted, to which Arthur and Yann agreed. “Yeah, go on, have fun.”

“He wasn’t looking at me. Plus, he’s not my type. I just told you I wouldn’t see myself with someone young.”

“You don’t know how old he is but alright, just a hook up! Who cares, let loose.”

They really wouldn’t let him go and one glance at Yann showed him even his best friend wasn’t on his side. “Oh come on. I’m not going.”

But it was too late, Basile was already pushing him from his chair and toward the bar. The guy really was looking at them this time. If only for his friends to leave him alone, Lucas got up and took his empty glass back to the bar.

“What can I get for you?” The bartender came to him as soon as he got there. He took his empty glass away and put it under the counter as he waited for Lucas’ answer.

“I’ll have the same.”

Shortly after, another beer was put in front of him but Lucas didn’t take it.

“You’re not going back with your friends?” The guy asked when he saw Lucas not moving.

Lucas really looked up at him this time, he had short hair, a bit of beard, brown eyes. He had to admit he was cute but Lucas still couldn’t do this. “Not yet. My friends are sure you’ve been looking at me and now I have to pretend I actually talked to you.”

“Well, they’re not wrong, kitten.” The guy said with a smile. He leaned on the counter, crossing his arms on it. “So, did you come here to talk to me?”

Lucas was surprised by his words but he didn’t show it, controlling his expression before it was too obvious. “I’m too old for you.” He chose to say, which made the guy laugh.

“Oh please. You don’t know how old I am.”

“Yeah and you don’t know about me either.”

The guy straightened up and reached his right hand. “Mika, 34, nice to meet you.”

Lucas looked at him with a raised eyebrow, he was too old for him. Eventually, he shook his hand. He wasn’t sure why he said what came next. Maybe he just wanted to confront the guy, show him they really weren’t meant to be, but once the words were out it was too late to take them back. “Lucas, 68.” So much for hiding his age.

“Oh.” Mika said quietly and pulled his hand back. He smiled again quickly though. “Doesn’t bother me if it doesn’t bother you.”

“It does, actually.” Lucas said. It felt awkward as he didn’t want to hurt Mika’s feelings.

“I get it.” He said with a shrug. “Well, just so you go back with something…” Mika took a napkin and wrote his number on it. “And if you ever want to talk about anything, like being old or the last Star Wars movie.” Lucas took the napkin and stared at it. He muttered a thank you and went back to the table with his beer.

Basile let out a high pitched scream which made Arthur wince. “Baz.” He showed his ear.

“Sorry!” Basile said, voice at normal level again, and wrapped an arm around Lucas shoulder. “That’s my champion!”

Lucas looked over to the bar and saw Mika wink at him which only made Basile even more excited and Lucas laughed. Sure the guy was nice. Yann smiled at him, amused but also somewhat proud, as if his own kid had done something spectacular.

Lucas wouldn’t usually go and talk to people to deliberately make friends. It was small progress and not romantic at all, but it was progress none the less.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here ends chapter two!  
> Hope you liked the appearance of some of our favourite characters  
> Don't forget kudos and comments to tell me you liked it :) and you can still find me [here](https://diablots.tumblr.com/)
> 
> I'll see you next week with the next chapter!


	3. Not thinking ahead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> I hope everyone is doing good considering everything going on. Please stay at home and read all the fictions you never had time to read!  
> In this chapter we learn a bit more about how Lucas feels and see him give into something he's been wanting for a while... 
> 
> Find me [here](https://diablots.tumblr.com/) if you want to talk about anything, really <3  
> As always, I hope you'll enjoy the chapter, don't hesitate leaving me feedback, I see all of them and I love them!

October and November went by quickly and the exams session arrived earlier than Lucas imagined. He has been avoiding hanging out with his friends, not because he didn’t enjoy it but because he knew they would distract him way too much. Yann understood that he needed to focus on his studying for exams and let him alone for that period of time, only with the promise of not doing anything adult-like during the holidays.

It turns out that going back to school was harder than Lucas thought. He enjoyed most of his classes, took notes of them and liked learning new things which was why he hadn’t had any problem so far. What he didn’t think about, though, was how he always despised revising. Revisions had always been difficult for him because, if he liked learning as a whole, he disliked having to digest everything by heart just to be able to produce it again on a blank paper.

Having to force himself to concentrate on it was proving difficult with all the distractions his flat provided but studying somewhere else wasn’t an option either. Every time he decided to really focus, he’d turn off internet, which was proving to be efficient but only for so long.

Eventually, he just decided to drop some subjects. There was so much to know already, the chances for those disregarded subjects to play an important role in one exam were small. It was the sanest thing to do and it gave him a semblance of victory because he understood the rest. At least he already knew which option he’d choose during the second semester.

When he walked out of the last exam on the 13th December, he was properly exhausted. He was only holding his bag from the straps, letting it slide on the floor when his body collided with something strong. Before he realised, three guys surrounded him in a hug. “Oh my god, guys!” He let out.

They were whistling and while Basile was hugging him, Arthur messed with his hair. “Well done bro, You’re done!” Yann congratulated him with a high five.

“And we’re going to celebrate it!” Arthur pointed out turning to Basile who started chanting “Drinks, drinks, drinks!”

Lucas laughed as he listened to them. He didn’t realise just how much he missed their chaotic energy. Apparently they had decided to go to one bar and one bar only since they ended up in the same place, at the same table and, coincidently, with the same bartender than all those other times. Lucas waved at Mika to say hi. He had explained to his friends that they didn’t match but that they still decided to keep contact as friends. He hadn’t given any further explanation.

He and Mika had exchanged a few texts every now and then, it was interesting to be able to talk about their situations since Lucas hadn’t had a lot of contact with people who were old but looked young. Most people he had been working with at his old job had met their soulmate already and he never really talked to the few who didn’t. They were mere acquaintances, far from friends or anything that would lead them to talking about such a personal matter.

“So how did it go?” Yann wondered as they sat down with their drinks.

“Alright. I mean, I managed not to leave any blank answer so that’s that. Except the ones I deliberately didn’t study.” He explained. “I mean, I don’t care, if I had studied them, I’m not sure I would have known better how to answer and I would have had less time for the rest of it. I think I did great as a whole. What about you guys? Are you done with exams too?”

“I’ve got one more exam after the holidays but I’m done for now. I’d rather not think about it though. I honestly don’t know how to feel about what I did.” Arthur said, looking down at his drink. He didn’t feel quite confident but every time he talked about his future plans, he seemed to have it all figured out so Lucas didn’t worry about him. He was sure he would make a great engineer.

As he shot him a reassuring smile, Yann said. “We’re done too. I think we’re good, aren’t we?” He asked Basile who nodded eagerly. “It should be fine. The important thing is to pass, I don’t really mind the grades.”

“So, that means the holidays are starting.” Lucas pointed out with a knowing smile toward Yann. His best friend nodded slowly, knowing what Lucas meant. They had nothing to worry about for three weeks now.

“Cheers to doing nothing.” Yann said, raising his drink.

¤¤¤¤

It turns out Yann took at heart not doing anything during these three weeks of holidays. He took Lucas external hard drive away, the one where he had all the notes for his classes. He told Lucas that he needed to focus on himself for the holidays and that meant not thinking ahead of the second semester. He was only allowed to check his emails in case he’d receive the form to fill his option for the semester. But other than that, he had clear instructions: have fun.

“Play the piano, Lucas, finish that video game, go work out, watch a TV show all day, hell, adopt a dog if you want.” Yann had told him. It seemed like he was rather focused on making sure Lucas didn’t let this new beginning turn into a copy of his past years.

Lucas figured it would be nice to actually meet with Mika. He’s only had small talks with him when ordering beers at the bar and a few texts exchanged here and there.

> _Lucas (8:21pm)_
> 
> Are you free anytime this weekend?
> 
> **Mika (8:22pm)**
> 
> For you, I’m always free, kitten.
> 
> _Lucas (8:24pm)_
> 
> Right. Except when you find hook ups.
> 
> **Mika (8:24pm)**
> 
> Ah. Sorry, you’re not more important than my sex life yet.
> 
> _Lucas (8:25pm)_
> 
> Anyway. Do you want to hang out? We could grab coffee or something?
> 
> **Mika (8:26pm)**
> 
> Are you asking me on a date?
> 
> _Lucas (8:27pm)_
> 
> Mika.
> 
> **Mika (8:30pm)**
> 
> Sorry, sorry. You’re not fun. Saturday afternoon? My shift starts at 7pm, I’m all yours before that.
> 
> _Lucas (8:31pm)_
> 
> Sounds perfect.

As Mika and Lucas sat down with their coffee, Mika asked him. “So what prompted this?”

Lucas just shrugged, hands around his cup. “Nothing. I was free of any duty and I figured we could meet. We’ve never actually done this and yet we kept in contact.”

“Oh I sure thought you were interesting, that first time. Well, maybe interesting isn’t the word.” Mika glanced at Lucas with a knowing look, to which he just rolled his eyes. “But then you came to talk to me and, wow, that guy is older than me? No offence.”

Lucas chuckled as he shook his head. “So you were just interested in talking to an old guy.” He said.

“No! For your information, I often go to a group of people like us.” Mika informed him.

“Like us?” Lucas wondered, not sure he was following. He thought it was rare to live without a soulmate for so long.

“Well, not all of them are 60 years old. But there’s this support group for people without soulmates. I’m one of the youngest. Mostly because people don’t really worry about not aging until they reach 30 or so. You know, no reason to be concerned until time comes and you actually want to get a family. I mean, some people do have families without their soulmate but those from the group don’t think they could and so we’re there and we talk. It’s good to find people like us.”

“It makes sense, I guess.” Lucas said softly. He was still processing the information, mostly because he didn’t know what his thoughts on soulmates were. He was just focused on continuing to live.

“You could come, if you want.” Mika suggested.

“What? No. I don’t need support.” Lucas assured him. Mika didn’t look convinced but after all he didn’t know him all that well either, which is why he didn’t push when Lucas added: “I have Yann to talk to. We’ve been in it together basically forever.”

“Alright. Well, tell me, what is it like to go back to school?” Mika deliberately used the world school and not uni because he couldn’t understand why someone who lived for so long would want to go back to learning.

“It’s fun, actually.” Lucas told him. “Well, weird at first because I figured, you know, how the hell am I going to pretend I’m young when I have no idea how to act like it? But it turns out no one give attention to others there. It’s just you and your friends. And mine, well, they’re just really comprehensive. Although, I still wouldn’t tell my age to just anyone.”

“That’s fair. I’m honoured you decided to tell me.” Mika said. There was a trace of teasing in his voice but it was mostly genuine.

Lucas asked Mika news about the people in his life. He knew the man was living in a flat share with two girls named Lisa and Manon. Well, it was only Lisa now apparently, because Manon had decided to move in with her boyfriend. Mika was happy for her but it meant they had a free room and were losing one part of their small family. Mika even offered Lucas to move in with them. “So I won’t be the oldest for once, come on, Lucas! It’d be fun.”

Lucas refused though, he liked his own flat too much to let it go. Especially to move in somewhere smaller and with someone he doesn’t know.

Then, Mika tried asking him about life before the 21st century. When Lucas started telling him about the big events that he went through, Mika stopped him.

“No, not that. I mean, history is important and all, but I wanted to know about the gay community. You must have gone through terrible times… But it must have been exhilarating to live through it and see all those protests and… Man, I wish I had been there.”

“Oh.” Lucas fell silent. He looked down at his cup which used to have coffee in it. It was empty now. “Hey, do you want another coffee? I’m paying.”

Mika shook his head. “Hey, what’s up?” He wondered, worried he said the wrong thing.

“Nothing. I’m just the wrong person to ask about that.” Lucas said with a shrug. “I wasn’t out and proud. I just got a divorce and I didn’t think it was worth being gay when there was the possibility of dying.”

“Dying?”

“Because of AIDS.” He explained.

“But it’s not… I mean, I know a lot of people died because of it but it’s not a reason not to be gay. And it’s not exclusive to us.”

“I know that now.” Lucas assured him with a small smile. He wasn’t proud of his old way of thinking but he couldn’t deny all of it. “But back then? I trusted the media. Look, can we not talk about it. It wasn’t the happiest part of my life, to be honest.”

And of course Mika would understand so he nodded. Even if he was still curious and wanted to ask Lucas thousands of questions about him, he wouldn’t. “Well, I think we could use a second coffee.” He agreed.

¤¤¤¤

It wasn’t until the middle of the next week that Lucas thought about it again. He glanced at the picture of his mom on the piano and remembered how she spent most of her life in a hospital and the rest just with her son, all of that because of one man who couldn’t let her go.

It made him think about his own situation and that’s how he ended up on his couch unmotivated to do anything. He didn’t know how to make a difference when he’s already been living this long and obviously didn’t manage to do anything great or big, even at his own scale. His thoughts were disrupted when his phone buzzed on the table.

> **Yann (2:35pm)**
> 
> How are you enjoying your freedom?

Lucas sighed. Oh he was enjoying just fine, making one with his couch.

> _Lucas (2:40pm)_
> 
> You don’t even know. I’ve never had so much fun.
> 
> **Yann (2:41pm)**
> 
> You’re a terrible liar, even through texts.
> 
> _Lucas (2:41pm)_
> 
> Yeah, you’d need to do it on purpose to lie in a text.
> 
> **Yann (2:43pm)**
> 
> Exactly.
> 
> Wait.
> 
> Are you okay? Do you want me to come over?
> 
> _Lucas (3:02pm)_
> 
> Tell the boys to come along too.

Lucas wondered for maybe too long if he should send that last text. He didn’t know if it would actually do him good to see them right now but he figured it would be better than sulking alone. Plus, he had promised Basile to invite them over once so they could see where he was living.

That’s how two tornados arrived in his flat barely half an hour later.

“Oh my god, Lucas, you live here? Alone?” Of course that would be their first reaction. Even Lucas had to admit it wasn’t usual to have such a flat when you lived alone. It was big. But it wasn’t something that impressive according to him.

“This living room is bigger than my whole house.” Basile exclaimed to which Arthur laughed.

“Well, now I don’t think that’s true but still. It must have been super expensive to get it, especially here in Paris.”

Lucas simply shrugged, glancing at Yann who seemed to understand their surprise. “Not really… I bought it in the 70’s and well, my father helped paying. It wasn’t as expensive as if would be today, I guess.”

He didn’t even have time to offer the guys a tour because Basile and Arthur already left the living room to explore. Alright, his living room was big enough for a big bookshelf, a gigantic couch which matched the size of the TV, a fireplace and a piano but the rest wasn’t all that impressive. It had a classic kitchen next to it and a hallway going to two average bedrooms and a bathroom big enough for a shower and a bathtub. And alright, Lucas had an 80m² flat just for himself but why did it even matter?

“No but, you don’t get it! We could be so popular if we had parties in here! You have to organise it, Lulu come on!”

Lucas frowned at that suggestion. He didn’t see how organising a party in his flat could make them popular. He didn’t even care about being popular to be honest and that made him feel detached from them once more. As if he didn’t belong.

“Whatever, do you guys want to play something? Yann made me buy that game, um, Resident Evil?”

“Oh, you started it?” Yann wondered as he saw the box on the coffee table. He got his answer though when he noticed the plastic was still around it. “You didn’t.”

“No, I didn’t. I had other things to do. But it’s the perfect opportunity, right?”

Soon they were all sitting on the couch, the game was on and Lucas had brought them drinks. He gently refused to play, saying he preferred watching and learning. It was enough for them not to push but Yann still kept glancing at him so Lucas had to actually pay attention to what was happening.

Eventually, Lucas still drifted off and Yann, who thought company would be enough to distract Lucas from his thoughts, realised they would have to talk.

“Okay, what’s going on?”

That question raised their two other friends’ interest and they stopped playing. When Lucas realised he had all the attention, he sighed. It was complicated to put words on his thoughts.

“It’s just… I feel out of place, as if something was off with me.”

“Off? What do you mean?” Yann wondered, trying to understand where Lucas was going with that.

“Like I don’t belong. You’re all here having fun, you too Yann and then there’s me who just studies.”

“But you’re having fun with us, aren’t you? Did we do something wrong?” Basile asked worriedly. The last thing he wanted was not to include Lucas in the group.

“No! No you didn’t, you guys are probably part of the best people I met.” Lucas assured him and Basile found his smile back. “I think it comes back earlier than just this year.” Lucas admitted. He’s had time to think about it and he just never got it right. “So, I didn’t grow up but I did grow old. I feel old. Yann you managed to be yourself, to make yourself a place in this evolving world while I was just a passer-by.”

“I haven’t done anything special though.” Yann told him. “I wouldn’t know what to advise you or whatever.”

“Not what I’m asking for.” Lucas said with a sigh. “I think it might even be too late, you know. Sometimes it’s just like I’m the old guy in the picture who act really shitty because he can’t understand the world today.” When he saw the look of confusion on his friends’ faces, he added. “You know that stuff on internet that everyone shares, it’s usually a picture or a funny situation.”

“Oh! They’re called memes!” Basile exclaimed, unwillingly proving Lucas’ point.

“Wrong timing.” Arthur said, shaking his head at him as Lucas made a gesture signifying something along the lines of ‘see, that’s what I’m talking about.’

Basile looked between Arthur and Lucas for a bit before speaking. “Alright but look, what does it even mean to belong? Maybe none of us belong, we just make a space for ourselves, as you said Yann did. Why wouldn’t you be able to do it then? You’re here, hanging out with us, studying and maybe you don’t get all our references but that doesn’t matter. We still like you, and you’re still doing good at uni. I don’t think belonging should be a problem here.”

Nodding along, Arthur added. “And if that matters so much to you then we’ll be more than happy to tell you how to be young and cool these days. Because, you know, we are.” At least that forced a chuckle out of Lucas and Arthur pretended to be offended. “I’m sorry, are you making fun of us?”

“He wouldn’t dare.” Yann said before Lucas had time to answer.

“Thanks, guys.” Lucas said softly after he stared at the ceiling, thinking through what Basile had said. He had friends, he had Yann and people who could understand him. He was doing something he liked with his life and after all, he was also still adjusting to not having his mom in his life, again. Maybe what he has now should be enough and he shouldn’t seek for more when he didn’t know what ‘more’ could be. “I think you have a point.”

“Don’t hold onto the past too much, yeah?” Yann said, squeezing Lucas’ shoulder. “This is completely different from what you’ve known so far. Most of your life has been the same but don’t let this get you down, it’s new. New things are as exciting as they are scary.”

Lucas nodded with a smile and Yann pulled him in his embrace.

“Group hug!” Basile exclaimed and suddenly Lucas was suffocating in the arms of three different people.

¤¤¤¤

Lucas kept their conversation in mind however, it was hard to keep smiling when Christmas got closer and he was reminded that this year he’d be alone. He had spent Christmas day alone before and Yann always found a way to make them do something, just the two of them. But this time it was different, this time Lucas was alone because he truly had no one left in his family to celebrate it with.

Or that’s what he thought at least, until Yann literally dragged him to spend time with his own family. Yann had lost his parents too but he had a sister. She had found her soulmate decades ago and now looked way older than Yann. She was close to 60 years old, still happily in love with two kids, a grand-kid and a second one on the way.

Sure, it was weird to have a sister who grew old when Yann didn’t move and it was hard for the grand-kid to understand what was happening but they still spent a lot of quality time together. Yann made sure to enjoy all the time he could get with them.

They knew Lucas and his situation too which is why they had easily agreed to welcome Lucas that year. It wasn’t the same and Yann wasn’t going to pretend it was but Lucas was still grateful for his friend’s action.

“Hey, Lulu.” Yann said as they went to sleep that evening. They were all staying in his sister’s house in the countryside and Yann and Lucas were sharing a room. “I haven’t given you your present yet. It’s because you’re the one who’s going to choose it.”

Lucas didn’t say anything, simply looking at Yann, confused. First because he didn’t expect his friend to give him anything, even if he guessed Yann would. Second because presents were supposed to be surprises so how could it be if he chooses it?

“I know there’s something you’ve always wanted but never actually went for. And I think, even if you’re used to not being around people much and you definitely enjoy being left alone from time to time, you’re still kinda lonely. So when we go back to Paris, we’re going to a shelter and getting you a dog.”

“A dog?!” Lucas asked with wide eyes. “Yann, I can’t! I’m studying, I don’t even know what I’m gonna do after that, I’ll never have enough time to take care of a dog!”

“That’s all excuses and we know it. Before that it was because your place was too small, then because you were working too much, then because you had to take care of your mom. I’m done endorsing your sorry excuses. You have less class hours than you used to have working hours and except enjoying your time with your friends, you have nothing to do. So, we’re getting you a dog.”

Lucas couldn’t argue, damn Yann for always finding his weak spot. He was making up excuses because it was easier than acting on what he wanted. Because a dog was a lot of responsibilities and he preferred not doing it than risking anything. He’s got no other choice this time though and it was probably for the best.

¤¤¤¤

True to his words, Yann dragged Lucas to a shelter the very same day they got back from his sister’s place. Lucas immediately got overwhelmed by the number of dogs there, big, small, sleeping, jumping, barking, reaching for cuddles.

He walked excitedly through all the dogs’ cages and when he saw his friend’s reaction, Yann knew he had had a good idea.

They went to the reception to look for some guidance in choosing the right dog. They explained it had to be a small one who could live in a flat. Lucas’ place might be big but it was still just a flat with a balcony. It had to be a dog who could stay alone, not requiring constant watch but who still enjoyed cuddles and gave love. “Because that guy needs some love in his life.” Yann said, mentioning Lucas who rolled his eyes but didn’t contradict him.

The lady helping them smiled as she heard the explanation. “I think I have just what you need.” She started walking toward a part of the shelter where they didn’t go. “She arrived a few days ago and we’re all certain she won’t stay here for long. You know, it’s never understandable why people abandon their pet, but it’s even more confusing when it’s pedigree dogs. But at least it’s good for these ones because they don’t stay here long.”

They entered a room where a few small dogs were resting and one of them immediately trotted toward them. The lady crouched and picked up the cutest dog Lucas had ever seen. “Meet Ouba.”

Like anyone would, Lucas took a small voice when he stepped closer. “Well, hello.” He said softly and let Ouba sniff his hand before he petted her head. It had only taken a few seconds for Lucas to fall in love with her.

She was a healthy, two years old Pomeranian who had been left in an empty garden after the couple who lived their moved out. The neighbours called the shelter because they knew no one was living in that house anymore.

“Poor baby.” Lucas had said, petting Ouba some more when he heard the story.

A few hours later, after the administrative requirements were done, Yann and Lucas arrived at his flat and let Ouba run freely to discover her new home.

“So, good idea?” Yann asked with a sly smile.

“The best.” Lucas had to admit and went to hug Yann. “Thanks.” He whispered and his friend just held him tighter in response.

Lucas then picked up Ouba, who had come back to them. “Welcome home baby. This is a new chapter for you and for me.”


	4. Some fresh air

The two and a half weeks left of holidays had been just him, Ouba and the guys. The first night Ouba spent at the flat, Lucas had put a cushion for her at the foot of the bed. She sniffed it but didn’t settle down, instead looking up at the bed and jumping on it.

“I see, you’re a little princess, aren’t you? Alright come on here.” Lucas said and let her rest against his legs.

The gang, as they loved to call themselves, met a few times after that and spent New Year’s Eve partying with a bunch of people Lucas didn’t know but who were friends with Basile and Arthur. He also officially met Daphné, among others. He woke up on the 1st January with a terrible hangover but happy memories.

It was now the 12th January, the Sunday just before classes start again. Lucas had enrolled in his classes earlier that week and had been able to take all the options he had wanted.

Ouba hoped on the couch where Lucas was sitting and looked at him after he called her over. “We need to talk.” He told her.

“Look, I know we’re growing used to each other. We basically spend all our time together but tomorrow I’m going to have to leave.” Lucas paused and looked at Ouba. “Don’t look at me like that. I have to go and study so I can find a job after that. But I’ll always come back, I promise. I’ll take you out in the morning and then in the evening and we’ll still sleep in the same bed. You’re just going to have to get busy during the day so you don’t miss me. And I’ll do just the same, but I know I’ll miss you anyway.”

Ouba barked at him and Lucas chuckled. “Yeah, I know, you’re already independent, I shouldn’t worry. But I just don’t want you to think I won’t come back like those people before me.”

Lucas apparently didn’t understand what Ouba was trying to say because she was now crawling on his lap and to catch something on the couch next to him. Lucas realised she was now holding her plush fox in her mouth.

“Right. You don’t care if I’m here or not, as long as you have food and your fox, don’t you? So much for the love.” Lucas falsely complained.

¤¤¤¤

It had been hard to go back on campus during the first week. It wasn’t even because he had to get up earlier to have time to take Ouba out or that his schedule didn’t allow him to have lunch with the guys as often as the last semester did. This semester just felt a lot heavier than the last one. As if it had been just an introductory session and now things were getting serious. The first week alone gave him that impression so he figured it would probably be like this for the rest of the year too.

Everyone was over the place. He had been growing accustomed to seeing the same people all the time and now they were all in different classes. Due to the different options, he only saw the whole class for a few hours, the mandatory ones. Other than that, it was new people in each option, some he knew the faces of and some he didn’t. Apparently those classes were mixed with other degrees.

They were also in smaller classrooms than before, as they were a maximum of 20 people in each option. Lucas was sitting at the second row, notebook in front of him, being one of the few who preferred taking notes on paper rather than on a laptop. In this particular class they were two. There was a black girl- woman? Lucas never knew how to call them. They were all child to him but they might as well be as old as him. Anyway, a black person in front of him had a notebook too.

It was the second time they had this class: medical biology.

The teacher, a woman who was clearly aging but still looked young, came in the room and everyone stopped talking. Lucas had much more respect for that woman than for the guy who taught the generic biology course during the last semester and for all the right reasons. She didn’t consider the students inferior to her and seemed to question herself whenever a student said something that was relevant and contradicted what she said.

The two hours with her went by quickly. Even if it wasn’t Lucas’ favourite subject, the teacher managed to make it interesting and kept everyone’s attention. By the end of the class, she gave them one last instruction.

“As I told you one of your grades will be a group project. You’ll do it in groups of two and pick your own subject that I will approve of. So don’t forget to tell me about it before you actually start working. I wouldn’t want you to work on something that you’ll have to drop in the end even if I do encourage you to study all of the subjects raising your interest.” She said, smiling to the class. “Please send me an email by the end of the week with your group and your subject.”

Lucas stared at the woman who was already packing her papers, ending the class. He looked around, most people were chatting between themselves, already packing their stuff too. How was he supposed to find someone to do that project with? They all had friends already.

The girl at the front turned toward him before he had time to panic further. “I know you.” She said with a raised eyebrow.

“Um…” Lucas let out, perfectly coherent. He had no memories of meeting her.

“New Years’ Eve. You were at Daphné’s place.”

“Oh.” Lucas added to stay even more coherent.

“Lost your tongue?” She asked.

“Well, it’s just, um… I was very drunk. And I hadn’t been for a while. I remember a lot but I don’t remember… meeting you?” Lucas offered sheepishly. “I’m sorry.”

The girl laughed and Lucas could feel she was making fun of him. “Yeah. Right, you did seem quite drunk. I’m Imane.”

“Okay. Nice to meet you… again. I’m Lucas. But you know that already, I guess. Um…” Lucas wasn’t sure what to add. He had been taken aback by the fact that she had already seen him in one of his worst state.

“Do you want to do that project together?”

“Sure. That’d be great. I don’t know anyone else around here so…” If that’s what she wanted, Lucas was more than on board with it.

“Hm. Seems like I’m the only meds student interested in taking extra classes so, me neither. You are a serious student, right? I’m not getting in a group with a burden?”

Lucas shook his head quickly. “No, no. I’ll do my part of the work, don’t worry. I just started studying again so I’m not here to fuck it up.”

“Again?” Imane asked surprised, but when Lucas shrugged it off, she didn’t ask for more.

After exchanging numbers to make communication easier, they decided to think of a few subjects each and then put their ideas together to decide which one they would focus on. Well, at least he knew one person from one of his new classes now.

¤¤¤¤

“I met someone.”

There were a few things that Lucas didn’t particularly enjoy hearing and that sentence was part of them. It’s not that he wasn’t happy for Yann or that he wished him celibacy. On the contrary, meeting someone is great. But Yann had met a few people in his life and every time Lucas had been around, he wondered if this time it was the right one. Because, Yann and Lucas, they’ve been friends since they were kids and for some mystery reason they even stayed together through decades, not aging. If you considered how Lucas had never had stable relationships and that everyone ended up leaving him, losing Yann was one of his biggest fear. He was his only sense of balance.

He couldn’t hold Yann back though, so he put a smile on his face and replied. “I’m happy for you.”

Yann didn’t seem to buy it, of course, he had an idea on how Lucas felt. “Lulu… You know it’s not-”

“No, it’s fine.” Lucas interrupted him, shaking his head. “I am happy, truly. Do you want coffee?” He wondered, changing subject quickly.

As Lucas got up from his couch where he and Yann were sitting to head to the kitchen, his friend insisted. “Lucas, I’m not leaving you.”

Lucas came back on his steps and just let his head through the door. “I don’t want to talk about it. Coffee?”

Yann nodded, accepting the silence this time. Lucas was glad about it. That conversation would go nowhere but mostly, it wasn’t a conversation worth having when Yann had met someone just recently.

Lucas came back with two cups of coffee and sat down on the couch again. He had shaken away the bad thoughts coming to his mind about Yann finding someone to love and truly smiled at him this time. “Tell me about her.” He asked holding the cup of coffee between his hands.

And it went on like that, Yann explained that she was called Sarah, that she was 34. Upon hearing her age, and even though Lucas knew it wasn’t good to think that way, he relaxed. She was way too young to be Yann’s soulmate.

He met her online, she has an office job where she’s the one handling employees, Lucas didn’t really ask for details. From what Yann said, she seemed to be a bit like Chloé, back when Lucas dated her. A wave of fresh air, she felt like she could take over the world but only after finishing yet another book. Yann liked how her hair fell in front of her eyes and how she always used her middle finger to put it back behind her ear. And that’s how Lucas realised Yann was really gone for her.

“I don’t know, bro, she has that aura around her. It’s crazy. We’re so different but it’s not a problem, we just really get along.”

Lucas looked down at his coffee before taking a sip of it. He would really have to be an ass to put his own abandonment issues before his friend’s happiness.

“Have you told her your age?” Lucas wondered.

“Yeah and it went really easy. She didn’t really mind, after all it’s not like it has an incidence. I still look young and handsome.” Yann said, raising his eyebrows suggestively. “Plus, I prefer to get it out of the way at the beginning. Imagine if something happens and then I tell her: hey, actually I’m really old and suddenly she doesn’t want me anymore. It’s not worth it.”

“You wise, wise man.” Lucas commented with a smile.

“You know, I try.” He joked. After a minute of silence, he added. “Hey, I’m really glad you’re taking it this way. I know with uni, your mom and everything it’s not easy for you to adapt. I was worried about what to tell you. I really don’t want you to think that was it, that the last remnant of your old life was gone.”

Lucas looked at him with a frown. “Gone? You’re still here aren’t you? I mean, you’ve been in relationships before, it’s always been good.” He replied with a shrug. He got where Yann was coming from, but it wasn’t something he decided to worry about now.

Before Yann had time to do anything else than smile at Lucas, they heard a yelp coming from the hallway. Lucas checked the time and winced. “Ah shit, it’s time I take her out. Wanna come?” He offered.

Yann shook his head. “It’s getting late, I’ll just go home.” He assured him. “But I’ll see you tomorrow for lunch?”

“Sure.”

¤¤¤¤

Evening walks were longer than morning ones. In the morning, Lucas took Ouba around the block so she could have some fresh air and so she could pee. On evenings though, especially on the days Lucas didn’t have class, they went for the big walk all the way to the park a bit further away. It was mostly time to play so she could run around and be active. She also asked for a lot of cuddles.

By the time they went back home that day, she seemed well spent, happy to just eat something and go to bed. Lucas wasn’t as tired, but those moments with her, when he could just forget everything and play with his dog, were slowly becoming his favourite moments. Once inside his flat, he made himself something quick to eat and moved to the couch, turning some TV show on with Ouba right next to him.

That’s the moment his thoughts chose to start racing in again. He couldn’t concentrate on the TV anymore and quickly turned it off, sighing heavily. “Fuck…” He let out under his breath, his head falling on the back of the couch. Eyeing Ouba, who had raised her head to look at him, he sighed again.

“Look, I don’t mind that he has a girlfriend. Who am I to stop him anyway? Plus, that girl can’t be his soulmate, she 34 and he’s 68. See that gap? No soulmate.” He assured her, or at least he wanted to believe it. “It’s not possible, right, to have a soulmate younger? I mean, it’d be creepy. Even if we look the same the mentality is different.”

Lucas couldn’t even understand his friends’ sense of humour completely, how could he understand a whole person from a different generation enough for them to be his significant other? “Impossible. So, I guess he’ll spend a little more time with her and a little less with me. But that’s fine, I got you and I got the guys. They’re great people too. My best friend is in a relationship and I’m happy for him. Hope it will last. Maybe they’ll last forever. Be one of those couples who get along without being soulmates. So I don’t age, they don’t age and everyone’s happy.”

Lucas looked back at Ouba who had put her head on her little legs again to sleep. Lucas groaned when he realised she hasn’t even been listening. “You don’t care. Obviously. I mean, you’re a dog. You don’t have to wonder where your soulmate is. You just have to live a quiet life, being fed and cuddled.” He frowned slightly.

“I’d like to be fed and cuddled. But let’s be honest, I’m not even sure I believe my soulmate will appear one day. I mean, look at my mom. For all I know, the reason I didn’t meet him yet is because he died before I got the chance. And here I am moving on with my life as if there’s a chance I’ll randomly bump into a guy who will make my body realise that, hey, it’s time for grey hair! I don’t want grey hair!”

Lucas wasn’t sure what he was saying made sense anymore. “I’m fine like this. I’ve been alone for a while and now I’m not even alone, I’m with you. See, that’s what’s going to happen. I’ll finish that degree and once I have it I’ll look for a job. Then, if I don’t find one, what’s the point of going on? I’d go back to looking for a random job I won’t like. Eventually, you’ll be gone too and Yann will be with that Sarah girl and I’ll be alone again.” His voice shivered by the end and he cleared his throat. “Yeah, if this degree doesn’t work out for me then I guess I’ll- I will…”

He dropped his head into his hand and sighed heavily. “Yann would slap me for even thinking like that.” He muttered just as he felt something on his leg. Opening his eyes, Lucas smiled as he saw Ouba’s head resting there. “I’m thinking too much ahead, right? I’ll stay around while you’re here of course, don’t worry.” He said quietly. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

Lucas picked Ouba up and headed upstairs to the bedroom. He put her down her spot and laid in bed too. He skipped getting ready for bed that night and spent enough time petting Ouba’s fur until he managed to fall asleep too.

¤¤¤¤

It’s the third week after they started classes again and Lucas had his medical biology class along with Imane. He had moved at the front, next to her, making it easier to discuss their project and anything else, really.

It turns out that Imane had been in high school with Basile and Arthur, and they grew part of the same group of friend which was why they had all been there at the New Year’s party. It made sense, now that he thought about it. Imane also informed him that there was a party he wasn’t aware of.

“Which party?” Lucas wondered when Imane asked him if he was coming.

“You don’t know? Weird, I was sure the girls would have told Basile and Arthur by now and obviously those two would invite you and Yann along. Anyway, my brother is having a birthday party this Saturday.”

Lucas was about to retort that he didn’t know her brother and there was no reason for him to come when Imane raised her finger to his lips, making him quiet before he even said anything.

“Don’t talk when I’m not done.” She warned him. “He wants a big party with tons of people, don’t ask me why. So he invited his friends and told me to invite mine too, basically it’s a birthday party where everyone and anyone could be invited. So, you’re welcome to join.”

“Sure then, that’s cool. I’ll tell the guys myself?” He guessed. “I’m sure they’ll want to come.”

Imane nodded slightly. “Great. Try not to drink too much, wouldn’t want you to forget we met, again.”

Lucas smiled sarcastically at her. “You’re never letting that go, are you?”

“Never.” She offered cheerfully.

> _Lucas (3:50pm)_
> 
> Guys. How come we’re not aware that there’s a party on Saturday?
> 
> **Basile (3:51pm)**
> 
> Shit. The party.
> 
> There’s a party, you wanna come?
> 
> _Lucas (3:53pm)_
> 
> Geez. Thank god I saw Imane and she told me.
> 
> Yann (3:53pm)
> 
> A party? Where?
> 
> **_Arthur (3:55pm)_ **
> 
> Sorry guys, it completely got out of our minds.
> 
> We’ll send you the address. Idriss, Imane’s brother, is having a big birthday party and we’re invited. You too apparently.
> 
> _Lucas (3:56pm)_
> 
> Yeah, we are.
> 
> Yann (3:58pm)
> 
> Party time!!

¤¤¤¤

They arrived just a bit late. Basile said it was important to make an entrance which Lucas didn’t quite understand. He understood it even less when they stepped in the room and absolutely no one gave them any attention.

The party seemed already on full swing, some were dancing to the loud but bearable music, others were chatting, drink in hand and the rest of them were at the back were tables had been set to play different drinking games. Nothing gave any sign that this was a birthday party, except for one table against a wall with a sign saying “drop your presents here”.

They didn’t have any presents but after all they didn’t know Imane’s brother and, considering that he wanted a big party, Lucas guessed that they couldn’t be the only ones without presents.

They finally spotted the girls who showed them were to put their coats. Once done, Lucas got a beer and joined the group of people who he should consider his friends now.

It turns out that he became quite close with Imane, who threatened to murder him if he ever said they were friends: she had a reputation. He also liked Emma and her nonchalant behaviour, she just followed the rhythm.

They were laughing at a joke when Lucas felt a hand on his shoulder. “Kitten! What are you doing here?”

“Mika? I could ask you the same thing.” He pointed out.

As Lucas turned around, Mika pulled him in a hug to which Lucas replied awkwardly.

“I came with Imane.” He said, pointing at her absentmindedly.

“Ah. Well, Manon is friend with those girls. She couldn’t come tonight, but since she knows I’m always up for parties, she asked Imane if we could come.” He explained.

“We?” Lucas wondered. That’s when someone moved to Mika.

“Fuck, Mika, I looked for you everywhere, you couldn’t wait for me, right?”

“Sorry.” He told her with a smile. “Lisa, this is Lucas. You know the guy I was telling you about.”

“Hey.” Lucas said as she eyed him with a raised eyebrow. “The guy who wouldn’t let you fuck him?” She asked.

Lucas turned his head toward Mika with an offended face but didn’t have time to say anything when he felt another arm on his shoulder. This time it was Arthur, leaning on him while Basile was leaning on Arthur. “Hey, isn’t that the guy we told you to flirt with? What are you doing here?”

Mika laughed at that. “I have a reputation, I see. I came to party obviously.”

“Yes that’s him, he’s a friend now actually.” Lucas reminded Arthur and Basile who was listening closely too.

Lucas noted that, while Arthur seemed to really focus when Mika was talking, looking at him and nodding along his words, he was more relaxed when Lucas talked. Arthur laughed softly and taped his shoulder. “Sure, just a friend.” He teased him while Lucas rolled his eyes.

Mika and Lisa were easily accepted in the group and they all started to dance. Lucas discovered them under a new angle. He would have never guessed Imane could dance like that or that Basile could be that cheesy with his girlfriend. The group dissolved a bit, Arthur had disappeared, Imane went to talk to other people, Mika went to get another drink… Lucas eyed his empty bottle of beer and suddenly felt tired.

He tapped Yann shoulder, mouthing that he was going outside before heading there. He left his beer on a table full of other empty bottles and finally stepped outside. Breathing some fresh air did him good. He smiled and sat down on the steps next to the entrance. The place where the party was happening was located slightly away from the street making the stars easy to spot since there was little light around them. He leaned back on his elbows and looked up.

He had always been bad at finding constellations. He only knew one or two but he always loved looking at those little spots in the sky. He must have gotten lost in his thoughts because he didn’t hear someone getting closer to him, barely just registered the “Hey.” Coming from what could only be someone else.

He frowned and turned his head to the person now sitting next to him. He had no idea who that guy was but he was sure that he had never seen such beautiful eyes. “Hey.” He said quietly. He actually didn’t register saying it, it had been automatic because he was still too busy looking at the man’s face. The most beautiful face, hypnotising eyes and distracting hair.

There had to be something on Lucas’ face because the stranger, although smiling, seemed embarrassed and looked away. Lucas wanted to tell him to turn his head again. That he wanted to look at him some more but even his fuzzy brain managed to stop him from saying something that ridiculous.

“It’s getting warm in there, isn’t it?” The stranger asked, apparently trying to make him talk.

“Yeah. I mean, that’s what happens when you put forty or so people to party in the same room, right?” Lucas offered.

It made the stranger chuckle. “Yeah, I guess.”

A silence came between them, a short one because Lucas didn’t want to give that guy a reason to leave. He wanted him to stay here.

“I’m Lucas.” He said, reaching his hand out.

The guy looked to his side when he saw the hand and took it. He looked at Lucas again, as they shook hands and said. “Eliott.”

At this exact moment, no name had sounded better in Lucas’ mind. Too soon for his liking, Eliott took his hand back to reach for something in his pocket. He took a joint out and light it, puffing smoke toward the sky. Lucas didn’t know why he couldn’t look away, it had to make him look like a creep, right?

After a bit, Eliott offered him the joint and Lucas shook his head. “No, thanks.” He said, shaking his hand in a negative manner. Eliott simply shrugged and continued smoking it himself.

“You seem old.” Eliott eventually said, glancing at Lucas. “And not in the good sense.”

Lucas frowned when he heard that. How could that guy know? Although he understood what Eliott meant. Being old was a good think, looking old meant you found the one person who’s going to understand you and be with you forever. Some people, however, looked young but still had something that made them seem old. Lucas wouldn’t be surprised if there was a way to tell that, especially for him. However, it wasn’t like it was written on his face. You’d have to be a good observer to realise it.

“Rude.” Lucas ended up saying, not wanting to direct the conservation to their age.

Eliott opened his mouth quickly but closed it again. He looked away with a sigh, as if realising what he just said. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude or whatever. Or say anything offensive.”

“Well, I’m 20, so I don’t know what you mean.” Lucas replied. He tried to appear unbothered but he was still defensive.

“Sorry.” Eliott repeated. “I shouldn’t assume… Whatever.” He got up. “It was nice meeting you, Lucas.”

Lucas’ eyes widened when he realised his reaction had made Eliott want to go away. “Hey, wait. I didn’t say you couldn’t stay, you know. I’m not… angry or whatever.”

He wasn’t angry, he was just being careful. And he really didn’t want Eliott to leave.

“You didn’t say it.” Eliott commented but still stayed up.

“I mean, it’s always good to have company.” He pointed out.

That must have done the trick because Eliott sat back down. “Okay, so tell me about yourself then, Lucas, 20 years old.”

Lucas forced a soft chuckle and shrugged. “Not much to tell, I study, I go out, I play video games, normal student stuff.”

“Normal student stuff. So you’re just an average guy?”

“Exactly, an average guy with a completely normal life in which nothing is out of the ordinary.”

It was Eliott’s turn to chuckle. He shook his head in a way that made Lucas wonder if he hadn’t done just a tad too much. “Too bad, I like people who aren’t average.”

“I… I mean.” Lucas stuttered as he heard that, he was really saying all the wrong things. “I… do pl-play piano too.”

“Hm… Piano, that’s good. Little less average.” Eliott said with a smirk.

Lucas had no idea what to do or what to say, he felt like he was making a fool of himself. He didn’t dare look at Eliott until he heard. “Hey, Lucas. I’m teasing.”

Lucas’ mouth opened at that. “Oh.” He let out. He couldn’t mange one coherent sentence and Lucas was totally blaming those eyes, sparkling in amusement.

When Eliott laughed softly, Lucas had the decency to look away, feeling his cheek redden. Eliott leaned in and shoved his shoulder with his own gently. “You’re cute.” He said.

And that definitely didn’t help with Lucas’ blush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here he is!! For my defense, dear Eliott was supposed to arrive earlier but Lucas decided to do and express so many things, I didn't manage to squeeze this party until now. That's when I realised I wasn't in control of the story anymore.
> 
> I hope you liked his first appearance, don't forget telling me all about it with comments, kudos or [here](https://diablots.tumblr.com/) on my tumblr.
> 
> Happy Sunday, take care of yourselves!


	5. What if I don't manage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy first Sunday of April! (What? There's always a reason to celebrate a random day)
> 
> I see that Eliott made quite an impression by finally showing up last chapter, we're moving to the deeper parts of the plot now...
> 
> Hope you'll enjoy it, as alway find me [here](https://diablots.tumblr.com/) to chat or ask me anything and feel free to leave kudos and comments!

To notice that someone looking young was actually pretty old, you had to be very observant. Lucas knew he wouldn’t be able to notice it but that Eliott guy apparently did. Lucas had looked for evidence of it. Eliott had taken him so much by surprise that he had to search what it meant to look old when you aren’t.

The facts were that as long as you didn’t meet your soulmate, you didn’t age. You look as fresh as 18 years old until you meet them. The average age in the 21st century is to meet them at 27, making the average dying age at looking 80 but actually being 89. That didn’t mean some people didn’t wait longer, just look at Lucas, Yann, Mika, Lisa… Although, lasting as long as Yann and Lucas was still rare.

Nothing was to say that Basile had found the right one in Daphné but it seemed that nowadays, things were less on that focus. Hearing Basile’s view on his relationship is enough of a proof. Lucas wouldn’t see himself with someone who isn’t his soulmate while the younger people he met didn’t seem to mind. They carried on, only thinking about their feelings at the moment and not about whether they’re the right one or not.

Lucas realised he was getting carried away, going through different articles and forums which didn’t quite answer his questions. He focused on what he was looking for again: looking old without being old.

Lucas eventually found an old forum where people talked about the subject.

_Subject: Do I look old?_

> **Christof:**
> 
> Posted the 24/08/2007 at 5:22pm
> 
> A friend told me I look old but I’m not, I’m wondering if it’s possible. I’m 41 but I haven’t aged yet.
> 
> **Stayo_@32:**
> 
> Posted the 24/08/2007 at 9:14pm
> 
> The answer is in your question isn’t it? How could you look old if you’re not? lol
> 
> **Ombre:**
> 
> Posted the 24/08/2007 at 9:56pm
> 
> I’m wondering the same thing. I’m not even that old but sometimes I feel like my age and not 18.
> 
> **Thea:**
> 
> Posted the 25/08/2007 at 10:36
> 
> It’s normal not to feel 18, your mind is still aging technically speaking. It’s just your body which doesn’t change.
> 
> **Christof:**
> 
> Posted the 25/08/2007 at 10:44
> 
> Yeah I get that but if my body doesn’t change how could my friend tell?
> 
> **94_Tonia:**
> 
> Posted the 25/08/2007 at 12:08pm
> 
> Because he knows your real age?
> 
> **Stayo_@32:**
> 
> Posted the 25/08/2007 at 4:23pm
> 
> If it bothers you so much just go for surgery. At least you will look old.
> 
> **Nicothinks:**
> 
> Posted the 16/11/2007 at 7:23pm
> 
> I know this subject is a few months old but I’m hoping I can answer your question.
> 
> You can’t technically look old but it’s possible to sense it. Kind of like someone could see you’re sad even though you’re smiling. That person would need to be really observant but yeah, it’s possible. In general, it’s more visible when you’re not quite happy with your situation. I mean, as in there’s something bothering you or if you don’t quite feel at ease around people who aren’t your actual age. It’s easier to tell if someone is old when they don’t feel good about it.
> 
> There’s nothing wrong with not aging though. It’s okay not to find your soulmate at an early age. You’re 41, yeah you’re over the average age but to have an average we need people who get older without meeting their soulmate right? And I strongly believe that we’re all meant to meet them at one point or another. So, it’s fine.
> 
> **Christof:**
> 
> Posted the 17/11/2007 at 1:15pm
> 
> I didn’t expect to hear from this anymore. Thanks for the explanation, it makes sense. I didn’t think it was wrong, just wondering.

Lucas closed the page quickly. He got his answer, although he wasn’t sure if he liked that a complete stranger could tell that about him. To be honest, he wasn’t sure why he wanted to hide it either. It just felt really personal and he didn’t want people to be sorry for him or whatever. He was already sorry enough for himself.

¤¤¤¤

It was Tuesday and on Tuesdays, Lucas and the guys could all have lunch together. It was one in the afternoon already and most people were done eating by now. When they arrived in the room, they went for a table in the back and sat down, Arthur next to Basile and Lucas next to Yann. They teased Yann about the beanie he was wearing, pushing him to take it off which he ended up having to do but only once he was sure the attention had shifted to whatever the guys were saying.

They all started chatting happily about the party, about a TV show, about just anything that crossed their mind. Lucas was laughing when he realised Yann was still holding his head down on his hand, elbow on the table and that since they sat down. It was weird to see him in a slumped position like that so Lucas pushed his elbow off the table. “Don’t put your elbows on the table, it’s rude.” He said jokingly.

Yann didn’t look too pleased as he had to let go off his head to stop himself from falling off the chair but couldn’t help a smile when they all chuckled at how he lost his balance. His smile disappeared when he fully realised what happened and what it meant, along with Lucas when he noticed why Yann had been resting his head on his hand. There, on the side of his head was a clear strand of grey hair. Lucas didn’t need an explanation to understand what it meant, especially considering his friend’s face.

“Hey, wait? Grey hair?” Basile intervened, leaning in to see better. “Have you toyed with hair dye?” He laughed but Arthur smacked him slightly in the stomach to make him realise now wasn’t the time.

“Since when?” Lucas asked quietly.

“It happened during the weekend.” Yann told him, clearing his throat. “I promise I was going to tell you I just didn’t…”

Lucas raised his hand to make him quiet. “It’s fine.” He said quietly and eyed his plate. He wasn’t hungry anymore. Without a word, he took his stuff and his tray and left. He didn’t react when his friends called after him, too disoriented by the news that his best friend had found his soulmate.

He was fighting against the tears that threatened to roll down his cheeks when his phone buzzed.

> **unknown number (1:21pm)**
> 
> Hey, Imane gave me your number I hope that’s okay. It’s Eliott, from the party.
> 
> _Lucas (1:21pm)_
> 
> Next time, I’ll tell Imane not to give my number to strangers.
> 
> **unknown number (1:23pm)**
> 
> Oh. Sorry…

The last thing Lucas needed right now was to be reminded of that guy whose first interaction had been to tell him how old he looked. He put his phone in his pocket, ignoring the next few notifications he got.

After calming down a little, he decided to go to his next class already.

¤¤¤¤

When the evening came, he was grateful he only had had a 2 hours lecture during the afternoon because he didn’t manage to concentrate on anything. It’s also only in the evening that he decided to check his phone again. He had three unread messages.

> **Arthur (4:38pm)**
> 
> I know it’s none of my business but I think you should talk to Yann.
> 
> Also, you can talk to me, if you need to.
> 
> **Yann (2:14pm)**
> 
> I’m sorry Lucas, I wasn’t going to hide it, I swear. Let me explain.
> 
> **unknown number (1:24pm)**
> 
> Don’t blame Imane though, please? She didn’t mean any harm. I’ll leave you alone.

Lucas didn’t feel like answering Yann and Arthur, he didn’t know what to tell them anyway. But he couldn’t let Eliott think he was mad at him. He had replied out of anger. Of course he knew Imane meant no harm and he wasn’t actually mad. If he stopped to think about it, he was actually glad to hear from the guy with the most beautiful eyes.

> _Lucas (6:45pm)_
> 
> Hey. I’m sorry for earlier. I was angry about something else and took it out on you. I shouldn’t have and I’m definitely not going to say anything to Imane.
> 
> **Eliott (6:56pm)**
> 
> That’s good to hear. I mean, not that you were angry… Nothing too bad I hope?
> 
> _Lucas (6:57pm)_
> 
> I’d rather not talk about it.
> 
> **Eliott (6:57pm)**
> 
> That’s fine.
> 
> So how are you apart from that?
> 
> _Lucas (6:59pm)_
> 
> I’m fine. As much as I can be on a Tuesday evening. What about you?
> 
> **Eliott (7:00pm)**
> 
> Much better knowing that I didn’t screw up.
> 
> _Lucas (7:01pm)_
> 
> Yeah, sorry about that. I swear it’s not about you.
> 
> **Eliott (7:02pm)**
> 
> Don’t worry.

The conversation stopped there, not leading anywhere else. Sometime later though, Lucas wondered why Eliott had reached out if it wasn’t to say anything special.

> _Lucas (7:45pm)_
> 
> Did you text for a reason?
> 
> **Eliott (7:51pm)**
> 
> Oh um, no. Just to get to know you, I guess? I enjoyed talking to you the other night, you’re interesting.
> 
> _Lucas (7:52pm)_
> 
> Oh _._
> 
> **Eliott (7:52pm)**
> 
> If you don’t want to that’s completely fine.

Lucas didn’t have time to add anything after his “oh” that another answer came from Eliott. He guessed he did scare the guy just a little with his earlier reaction. But of course he wanted to talk to Eliott, just as much as he was afraid that he’d be a little too observant for Lucas’ taste.

Later that evening, after talking with Eliott about the both of them and being completely clear with his thoughts, he sent a message to Mika.

> _Lucas (10:25pm)_
> 
> Hey. When’s that group of yours meeting? The one for old people.
> 
> **Mika (10:47pm)**
> 
> Lucas, hey! We’re meeting on Friday, 8pm. Are you coming?
> 
> _Lucas (10:49pm)_
> 
> Yeah, I think.
> 
> **Mika (10:50pm)**
> 
> Cool. See you then!

Just after that he wrote to Eliott again. He had offered to meet that Friday but Lucas wanted to go to that meeting, see people in the same situation as his and maybe meet people who had different opinion on not growing old. Meeting Eliott would just be for another time.

¤¤¤¤

For the rest of the week, he managed to avoid the three of his friends. It was quite easy since they didn’t have class in the same building. He felt bad for Arthur and Basile because they hadn’t done anything wrong but he didn’t feel like talking to Yann yet and seeing the both of them meant seeing him too. He had texted Arthur with a brief “give me time”, hoping he would pass the message to Yann and it stopped there.

It was a weird week for him. All kind of emotions went through his mind. He didn’t see his friends and Lucas didn’t think he spent so long without talking to Yann before. But at the same time he talked with Eliott everyday and that filled him with joy.

He didn’t know what he felt toward the guy. He’d be a liar if he said he wasn’t even just a little bit attracted by him, but at the same time he couldn’t exactly tell what was there. He’d only seen the guy once and sure he was handsome but that didn’t mean anything, did it? The only thing he knew was that he appreciated talking to Eliott. Being clear with himself on that would be enough for the moment.

Those two contradicted feelings toward different people didn’t seem to be enough for the universe because the university decided to give them their grades from the last semester that same week. They received the paper at home and so, on Thursday evening, Lucas discovered just how badly he had done.

He hadn’t expected perfect grades but he did study a lot for his exams and he wasn’t too happy seeing his results. He had passed most of his modules with just the average grade, did really great on two or three exams and failed one module. The grades he got in the other modules were high enough to compensate so he just barely validated his semester with the passing mark. He was still disappointed in himself though. Yes, he passed but he could only hear what his father would say if he saw that. He’d make him do the exams again until he got more than average grades.

He threw the paper away angrily which ended up looking ridiculous because it simply fell slowly on the floor. “Fuck!” He let out angrily, running a hand in his hair. He hated how his father still managed to make his way into his mind even though he wasn’t around anymore.

Ouba raised her head from the couch where she was sitting and growled when she heard Lucas shout. He sighed and went to sit with her, petting her fur. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to scare you.” He assured her with a suddenly softer voice.

At the same moment, his phone started to ring. It was an oncoming call from Eliott. He considered not picking up but couldn’t resolve to do that. He grabbed his phone and, as he kept petting Ouba, answered.

“Hi.” He said simply.

“Hello more than average guy. How are you doing?” Eliott’s soft voice came from the other side of the phone.

Lucas sighed when he heard the nickname and, before he had time to say anything, Eliott talked again. “Wrong timing maybe?”

Lucas shook his head. “No, no. Don’t worry. I just… I got my grades for the semester and it’s not great.”

“Shit. Did you fail? How bad is it?” Eliott wondered and Lucas actually smiled as he heard true worry in Eliott’s voice.

“No. I passed but barely.” He said quietly.

“Well, that’s just half a bad news then, if you still got your semester.”

“The thing is, I studied hard and I’m just average.”

“Ah.” There was something in Eliott’s reaction when Lucas pronounced the word average that Lucas didn’t quite understand. “Well, you studied hard you say, then you did everything you could.”

“Clearly not, if I couldn’t get higher grades.”

“Do you only have average grades?”

“No, I got a few good ones.”

“See, some subjects are maybe just more difficult or not for you. As long as you passed… I’m not saying you should settle for it but if you did everything then it’s fine.” Eliott explained, hoping that Lucas would get where he was going.

“I just hoped for more…”

“It’s always disappointing when we get less than what we expected, but the most important thing is that you’re satisfied with how you worked for it. Grades are just numbers, they don’t really mean anything. No one will look at them when you’ll look for a job, they’ll just see you got your degree.”

“But what if I don’t manage to do the same for the next semester and all those after that?” Lucas’ voice, although not completely reassured did sound calmer than before.

“You shouldn’t worry about that yet. Do the same than last semester and I’m sure it will work. And ask for help if there’s stuff you truly don’t understand.”

Lucas smiled softly, Eliott always seemed to find the right words although he didn’t know why it had so much of an effect on him. “Thank you. Tell me about your day?”

Ouba was now asleep on Lucas’ lap as they continued talking on the phone, Eliott telling him all about his art school.

¤¤¤¤

Friday came and he still had a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that Yann was going to grow old now. He also couldn’t understand how it happened because that Sarah girl he talked about was younger than him and Lucas was still convinced that a soulmate has to be more or less the same age than you.

At the latest hours of the day and the earliest of the night, he sometimes hoped to get a text saying it was just a prank. That it was hair dye, as Basile suggested. That Yann had a problem he couldn’t talk about, maybe he couldn’t bare looking young anymore and that’s why he tried it and it backfired. But then he reminded himself he couldn’t hope for Yann to feel wrong instead of wishing him to find his significant other.

He had to get used to the idea that he would lose his best friend. He knew, of course, that he wouldn’t just disappear but it wouldn’t be the same. He just hoped he could find some kind of way to deal with that during the meeting he would attend in the evening.

When the time came, it’s a bit nervous that he stepped in the room. A few people were there already around a table full of drinks and snacks. He noticed people had put their jackets on chairs and so Lucas did the same. Mika didn’t seem to be there yet, he took that opportunity to look around.

There were no chairs in a round or anything, people seemed to chat as if they’ve known each other for a long time, which Lucas supposed they did. The room was warm and the way it was decorated only intensified this feeling, Lucas felt good and not judged in here.

“Lucas!” Mika exclaimed wrapping a hand around his shoulder from behind. “You did come.”

Lucas turned around, a smile on his lips. “Seems like I did. Although it’s not quite what I imagined.”

“What did you imagine? Empty room, everyone talking about their life like it’s the alcoholics anonymous”

“Yeah, actually.”

“I’m not surprised. Everyone think that before coming here. Instead they see that we just chat, have a drink… Sometimes we never even mention our age or whatever. But if it’s why you’re here, I assure you, you can talk about it and people will listen.”

Lucas nodded slightly. He hadn’t planned on talking actually. He thought he could listen to people’s experiences and then decide for himself what to think. Now he wasn’t quite sure it would work.

“Come on, I’ll introduce you to the group.” Mika said and didn’t give Lucas time to object. He was already dragging him toward the group of people by the arm.

“Hello everyone.” Mika said, waving at them. “This is Lucas. Don’t be fooled by his baby face, he’s actually way older than he looks.” When someone opened his mouth, Mika immediately added. “Yes, older than that too.”

It seemed like everyone understood what the man, who didn’t get the chance to talk, wanted to say because suddenly all eyes were on him. Lucas felt uncomfortable suddenly, he never liked having the full attention.

“Um, hi.” He said simply.

Everyone started to present themselves and, even though Lucas was sure he wouldn’t remember their name, he listened to each one of them carefully. There were many more people than earlier and small groups were slowly starting to form. Lucas stayed with Mika and soon it was just five of them. He recognized Lisa from the party the other night but Lucas couldn’t seem to remember the names of the two others no matter how much he focused.

“And, you’re all really sure you’re going to meet your soulmate one day?” Lucas wondered, getting involved in the discussion.

“Yeah. It’s a fact, you meet someone eventually.” The woman replied as all heads turned toward Lucas.

“There are people who didn’t though.”

“Sure, but there’s a logical reason behind it. The only reason for you not to meet them is if they died before it happened… There’s also an instance where people meet them and miss the moment but in that case, the person just keeps coming back in their life. Those are not my words by the way, it’s from serious sources. I guess some people need a big sign saying, look, your soulmate’s here.” She added with a laugh.

Lucas didn’t seem completely convinced but there wasn’t much he could say against that. He had wondered if his soulmate wasn’t just dead already and that was why he was still waiting. His mom never let him believe that though. She’s always had hope even when it wasn’t for herself.

“When do you stop hoping then?” He asked. His voice was quiet, as if he wasn’t quite comfortable with the question.

“That’s… very personal, I think.” Mika answered with a shrug.

“Yeah. From what Mika said, I’m guessing you’re older than all of us. So do you still have hope?” The woman wondered.

Lucas frowned, he didn’t expect the question to backfire. “I mean… I never gave too much thought to it.”

“Hope or not, we all know we have a way out if we want. If we’re still around, then it has to mean we still have something to do.” The guy, he didn’t remember the name of, interfered. “I think we should all live long enough to have at least a whole life. If by then we’re still alone… That’s when you should start questioning things.”

Well that was the point, wasn’t it? Lucas had lived a whole life. A long one and no one had come around to change it so what should he make of it? He didn’t voice these thoughts, it was too personal. They already knew he was old, he didn’t want to explain everything and then have some strangers listen to his problems.

He didn’t even come for that at the beginning. He came because Yann, who had been the only constant in his life, started aging. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to lose that one thing, although he didn’t quite have a choice.

Lucas was back at being a simple observer, not participating in the discussion anymore when one of them commented. “I think the hardest thing is to watch your family age when you’re not.”

All the others seemed to agree but the thing is, Lucas had no idea what it was like to be surrounded by people aging. Sure there had been his colleagues, people at his mom’s facility but the people close to him didn’t age. His mom and Yann that is, he hadn’t been close enough to other people to be bothered about them aging. And he wasn’t sure he wanted to know what it felt like, to have people you care about get old.

“You get used to it though.” The woman said. “Sure, it’s always hard to let go of someone but that’s the same thing whether you age or not. If you don’t age, the only thing changing between you and them is their appearance.”

Lucas couldn’t understand how the aging thing wouldn’t change anything between him and Yann. His friend had always told him it was weird to see his sister grow and have a family of her own when he didn’t. So how could it remain the same between them when he was going to go through that too? But then again, Yann still saw his sister and they got along.

He got lost in his thoughts and the conversation shifted to another subject that Lucas couldn’t be bothered to focus on. He took a few steps back toward the table to munch on some crisps while he was thinking. He suddenly had the urge to talk to Yann so he went to Mika and excused himself. The man hugged him tight and told him he was glad he came and that he was welcome to come back anytime.

Lucas then left the place and walked back to his car. Once inside it, he opened the text app on his phone opening Yann’s conversation. He read through the several messages his best friend had sent him and that he had left unanswered. It had been a dick move not to answer him. He sighed softly and started typing.

> _Lucas (8:02pm)_
> 
> Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t answer, I needed some time. Would you want to come over tomorrow?
> 
> **Yann (8:05pm)**
> 
> Sure. I hope we’re good?
> 
> _Lucas (8:06pm)_
> 
> Yeah, of course.


	6. More time with you

When Yann arrived at his place on Saturday, he apologised and Lucas immediately told him there was nothing he had to apologise for.

“If anything, I should be sorry for leaving you like that. It wasn’t fair, especially on something you couldn’t control.”

“I should have told you earlier.”

“But you didn’t know how I’d react. Seriously, Yann, it’s fine. It’s not your fault. And I’m happy that you finally found her.” Lucas assured him with a comforting smile. “You’re not gonna disappear anyway.” He pointed out

“No. Of course I won’t.” Yann confirmed with a nod. “You still got me around for the next five decades or something.”

“I’ll make sure to make fun of you when you’re old and crumpled and I’m still good as new.”

“Come on, maybe you’ll be old and crumpled too.” Yann pointed out teasingly.

Lucas just shrugged, it wasn’t something he wanted to discuss right now. “Come here.” He said and pulled Yann in a tight hug. “I’m sorry for pushing you away. I hope I’ll get to meet Sarah soon.”

He felt Yann’s hands tighten around him and his chin rest on his shoulder. “You sure will.” Yann confirmed, making the hug last just that little bit longer. Yann’s hugs had always been good because his friend knew how to hold him and how to make it mean something. They rarely say how much they love each other and how much they care for the other but those hugs were enough to convey the feeling.

He always wondered if the two of them going through life together meant something else, if they were supposed to go through all those decades without aging together. But now that Yann found someone to love unconditionally, Lucas guessed his theory didn’t mean anything anymore.

“For what it matters, I think grey hair suits you.” Lucas said and chuckled along with Yann.

“I could definitely get used to it.” He confirmed.

Lucas finally invited Yann in. They ended up in the kitchen, Yann was sitting on one of the chair in the corner of the room while Lucas did something quick for lunch. He had his back toward Yann when he asked something that had been bothering him for a while. “What does it feel like?”

Yann looked up at Lucas curiously, he wasn’t sure if he meant to age or to be with someone who can fully understand you. It didn’t matter though because the answer to both was the same, it feels… “Amazing. There’s this little spark, constantly. I never felt that with any of my previous girlfriends.”

Taking two plates to put their food in, Lucas smiled just slightly. He couldn’t say he knew what Yann meant, he probably wouldn’t even be able to imagine it.

As Lucas gave him a plate and sat down next to him, Yann continued. “I mean, I don’t even know how to describe it. All those cliché we made fun of when we were young, I mean actually young, they’re true. And I’d slap myself in the face for even believing it would be lame to feel like that.”

“Seems like we really lost you there.” Lucas teased him. “Even Basile isn’t as sappy when talking about Daphné.”

Yann chuckled as he shook his head, of course Lucas would go that way. “But, you know, I think the fact that I waited for so long is playing a role too. She’s younger and yet she also had a very distinctive sign that she was aging. Maybe the feelings are multiplied so we don’t miss each other, I don’t know. I’m no expert, all I can say is that things couldn’t get more perfect than that.”

“I still find it hard to believe that people of different age can be soulmates. It doesn’t make sense.”

“What you’re saying is, it doesn’t make sense with what you believed was true. But here’s the thing, what you believe isn’t true. And you got a pretty good example here.”

“Yeah, can’t really deny it anymore.” Lucas agreed.

“This also means you could find your own at uni.” Yann continued teasingly with a half smile.

“Oh come on. Don’t start with that!” Lucas complained, rolling his eyes.

“I’m serious. I know it’s supposed to be all destiny and shit but your soulmate isn’t going to appear on your couch out of nowhere. Go search for him.” Yann encouraged him. He noted how Lucas focused on his plate and, when he didn’t get an answer immediately, he just sighed. “I’m just saying. I want you to be happy too.” He then continued eating as well.

He had to give that to Lucas, he really did know how to make pasta. After a silence that seemed to stretch, where you could only hear their cutlery clicking against the plates and spaghetti being slurped, Lucas pushed his plate away. “What if he’s not around anymore?”

“Bullshit.” Yann said with a shrug.

“You don’t know that.”

Lucas barely had time to finish talking that Yann added. “You don’t either.” He raised his hand in protest when Lucas opened his mouth. “Yes, it’s a possibility, I’m not denying it. But, there are so many people out there. I think there are more chances of him being among those people. You know, random people that you meet and suddenly connect with. Don’t start thinking that he’s dead or you’re going to lose your chance at it.”

Staring at Yann as he talked, one name came to his mind. Eliott. Lucas shook his head quickly to get it out of his mind. Yes they text almost every day and the boy is cute but how on Earth could that guy be his soulmate? Lucas didn’t want to believe it. “You done?” He asked staring at Yann’s empty plate.

“Yeah. Shall we watch a movie then?” Yann wondered, knowing he wouldn’t get much more out of Lucas right now.

Lucas nodded with a smile. He didn’t want his friend to worry, he didn’t actually think his soulmate was dead. It’s just that the thought of it being a possibility made him itchy. He wanted to feel like that, perfect, too.

They ended up watching an old film they both liked so they had a reason to comment it and chat, catching up on the last week. Lucas phone buzzed several times and from where it was on the table, he managed to read Eliott’s name on the screen.

Yann made eye contact with him each time and Lucas hoped it was because he was wondering why Lucas wasn’t answering the texts rather than because he could read the name of the person. He wasn’t sure the guys knew who Eliott was but even if they didn’t, he was sure Yann would start asking about him and Lucas wasn’t ready to share his thoughts. He didn’t even know what it meant for him yet so he preferred to keep Eliott to himself.

Speaking of which, once Yann was gone by the end of the day, he hurried to his phone to see what Eliott wanted.

> **Eliott (2:12pm)**
> 
> How are you doing mister not average?
> 
> **Eliott (2:45pm)**
> 
> I’m not used to you not answering.
> 
> **Eliott (3:19pm)**
> 
> Anyway, I’ll be around your uni on Tuesday. Maybe we’ll see each other.
> 
> **Eliott (4:56pm)**
> 
> This is going to sound stupid but tell me you’re okay?
> 
> _Lucas (6:02pm)_
> 
> Sorry! Was with a friend, I’m fine.
> 
> Have to see about Tuesday, but that’d be great.

Lucas didn’t get an answer this time. It was fair he guessed, he hadn’t replied for the whole afternoon after all.

¤¤¤¤

Eliott ended up replying to his text with a thumbs-up and Tuesday came without Lucas hearing about him again. He didn’t actually send him another text either so he was to be blamed just as much. Preparing for the project with Imane had taken him the rest of the weekend and then the week started again so he didn’t have time to think about it.

It’s only by the end of the day that he thought about it again, when he collided into someone who turned out to be Eliott.

“Lucas! Hey, didn’t see you there.” He exclaimed with a smile.

Lucas looked around the empty hallway. At this hour, it was only his class left and he didn’t understand why Eliott would be wandering these halls alone at that time. “What are you doing here?” He asked and maybe it came out wrong because Eliott looked away as if he was embarrassed.

“I told you I would be here.” He simply answered, to avoid explaining his presence at this exact spot. He’d rather remind him he was passing by uni and that coincidences happen.

“Yeah, right. Sorry.”

“Anyway, how are you?” Eliott asked after an uncomfortable silence between them. Everyone had left by now, even the teacher, which showed how late in the day it was already. Lucas was fidgety, he already put his hands in the pockets of his jumper to stop himself from grabbing at his bag anxiously. The thing is it wasn’t exactly the right time.

“Good. Look, I’m sorry, I can’t stay. A little princess is waiting for me at home.” Seeing Eliott’s expression change, Lucas realised it came out wrong as well. “My dog.” He blurted out quickly before Eliott imagined anything other than that, like him having a kid for example.

“Oh. Right, wouldn’t want her to wait then.” Eliott said with a slight nod. How come every time they wanted to meet, something came in the way? “Can I see her?” He asked, hoping to make Lucas stay just a little bit longer.

Lucas had tons of pictures of Ouba in his phone anyway so he agreed. He showed him one where she was lying upside down on the couch, her little paws in the air and mouth open as she was sleeping. Eliott’s reaction was immediate, he grabbed Lucas’ phone to get a closer look at the picture. “Oh my god, she’s so cute.”

Lucas chuckled slightly at Eliott’s enthusiasm. He knew she was and most people thought that way too but Eliott’s reaction was just adorable. It suddenly gave him an idea. “Want to come along?” He wondered. “I’m taking her on a longer walk on evenings, all the way to a dog friendly park.” When Eliott looked up with bright eyes and an excited smile, Lucas could only laugh again. “I take that as a yes.”

“Yes, of course. I’d love to!”

“Let’s go then.”

Eliott gave Lucas his phone back and, well, he guessed his evening could be worse for a Tuesday.

¤¤¤¤

From then on, Eliott just kept being surprised by Lucas. First because of his car. It wasn’t much that he owned a car but rather that he used it to go to class.

“Who even takes their car to go through Paris?” He wondered.

“People who don’t want to be sandwiched between sweating people.”

“Come on, with uni classes we don’t even necessarily have to take the metro at peak hours! Plus, I’m sure it takes you way longer with the car. I’m not even talking about the stress that is driving in Paris and the environmental impact!”

Lucas had stared at Eliott during all of his speech. He didn’t realise driving to uni could be seen as that controversial.

“Well, let’s call me an egoist, then, when I say I prefer thinking about my comfort even if it means taking longer to get there.”

“Where do you even live?”

Upon hearing the answer, Eliott stared at Lucas, confused. “That would barely take you 15 minutes with the metro. How long exactly is it with the car?”

“What? Are you working for the company and want me to get a subscription?”

“No, it’s just… People who take their car for such a distance when it’s literally on the metro line usually are people who don’t think they’re worth mingling with others or people working outside of Paris.”

Eliott didn’t get it, Lucas decided as he started the car. And he wasn’t about to change his point of view.

“You’re welcomed to take the metro and meet me there.” He said more coldly.

At Lucas’ tone of voice, which had to remind Eliott of the other night when he said Lucas was old, he softened. “No, of course. Sorry. It seems like I can’t help but say the wrong thing.”

“It’s fine, you just say what you think. There’s no harm in that.” As much as Lucas was annoyed by Eliott’s pointed comments, he actually liked to hear him voice what he thought. It was better than having someone agree to each and every one of his words.

He thought it might have to do with how his father wanted everyone to agree with him under any circumstances. Lucas didn’t want that, he wanted people to disagree with him and even welcomed arguments with open arms if they had to happen.

The second thing which surprised Eliott was the front of Lucas’ building. It was one of those old and fancy buildings you saw around Paris’ expensive neighbourhoods. But if Lucas thought Eliott had been surprised by the building, he didn’t expect the look he had when stepping inside his top floor flat.

After looking around quickly, he simply said. “No twenty years old can have such a big and nice flat, even with rich parents. I’m sure you lied about your age now.”

Lucas was at a loss of words. He guessed it was true, his flat indeed didn’t scream student flat. He hadn’t thought about this before offering Eliott to come over. Thankfully, before he got time to think about what to answer, Ouba trotted toward them, barking softly at the presence of people.

“There she is!” Lucas exclaimed, raising her up. “Eliott, meet Ouba.”

He immediately found his wide smile again when he started petting her. “Well, aren’t you the cutest.”

As an answer, Ouba growled lowly at him which made Eliott pull his hand back and glance at Lucas.

Lucas dismissed it with a shake of the head. “That’s how she says hi to new people.” He then turned her so she’d look at him. “Be nice with Eliott and he might throw you the ball at the park.”

Ouba’s ears perked up at that which never failed to amuse Lucas. She was so receptive to anything he said. “Yeah, you want to go out, don’t you? Okay, come on.” Lucas had to put her down because she was wiggling to get out of his arms and back on the floor.

She stomped excitedly until Lucas took her leash and attached it to her collar. No matter when and how, she was always excited at the prospect of a long walk.

“Come on.” Lucas repeated but this time directed it at Eliott too who stepped out of the flat along with Lucas.

The walk to the park took around 15 minutes during which Ouba would stop at every pole to sniffle it but never actually pee.

Eliott was walking next to Lucas, hands in the pockets of his jacket as he eyed Ouba’s every move. Or, at least he was every time Lucas looked up at him.

“When did you get her?” Eliott eventually inquired.

“Recently. She’s my Christmas present. We went to get her from the shelter.”

“A shelter? Her?” Eliott seemed as shocked as Lucas and Yann had been.

“Yeah, I know. But she has me now.”

“She’s lucky.” Eliott smiled softly when Ouba turned around as if saying that they were walking too slowly and Eliott looked up at Lucas with a chuckle. Then, they started walking faster to accommodate her.

“Who’s we?” Eliott asked, turning his head to Lucas.

“What?” Lucas let out, but before Eliott had time to reply, the question found its way up to his brain. “Oh, Yann and I. He’s my best friend. Has been since… for a long time.” 

“You were about to give your age away.” Eliott teased him and Lucas immediately shook his head.

“What’s your age anyway?” Lucas retorted to change the focus. He still wasn’t sure why he wanted to protect this information so badly.

“I’m 21. I can show you my identity card if you want to be sure.”

Eliott’s enthusiasm at the answer made Lucas uneasy. He raised the hand that wasn’t holding Ouba’s leash and ran it through his own hair to hide his embarrassment. “It’s fine.” Just now did he realise that it would be pretty easy for Eliott to figure out his age too so he decided to be ahead of him. “Aren’t you going to ask for mine?”

A smile broke through Eliott’s face as he let out a soft chuckle. “No, it doesn’t matter. You clearly don’t want to share it. I can bond with someone who doesn’t have an age.”

At the last bit of his sentence, Lucas looked at him with a raised eyebrow to which Eliott laughed louder. “What? Is it the bonding part of the no age part which makes you look at me like that?”

“Nevermind.”

They spent a long time in the park and Eliott ended up playing with Ouba most of the time. They were cute together, Lucas realised. Ouba absolutely loved him and it seemed to be a shared feeling. Lucas probably spent way too much time gazing at Eliott for his own good. He noted a few interesting things about him.

First, he had a magical aura that made Ouba and quite a few other dogs around love him. Lucas always had difficulties making Ouba give him her ball to throw it back away when she just put it at Eliott’s feet. Traitor. The dogs who wandered around them also took interest in Eliott and Lucas decided to put that on the fact that he was new in the park. Lucas had only been coming for a month and yet he’s already realised that people there were regulars.

The second thing he noticed about Eliott was that he had a magical aura that not only made dogs want to be near him but him too. And that’s probably what crossed his mind when he muttered under his breath. “Shit.”

Eliott had fluffy hair and Lucas wanted to run his hand through it. He’s always had a thing about hair and the people he’s been attracted to before always had hair that could be played with. It shouldn’t be a surprise that his next interest would have such gorgeous hair too. And that was established, if Lucas wasn’t sure of it before, he was attracted to Eliott.

He also realised Eliott could look both adorable and mysterious. Well, maybe mysterious wasn’t the best word but right at the moment it was the only adjective he could think of when he thought back about the guy he met during Imane’s brother’s party.

But the look of pure bliss Eliott had at that moment was far from what he saw the other night. His eyes were vivid, his smile wide and he was so excited that Lucas wondered who was having the most fun right now between him and Ouba. Although, if he was being honest, he’d have preferred to have Eliott’s eyes on his so he could really take in their beauty, but he guessed he couldn’t have it all.

The final thing he noticed wasn’t much about Eliott’s physical appearance but rather what it made him feel like. Truly, he had never felt like that with any of his previous short relationships, if he could even call them that. Every time Eliott turned to him to talk, he wanted to hear more. When he watched him, he wanted the moment to never stop. When his hands gripped Ouba’s ball, Lucas wanted to know what it would feel like if it hold his hand instead.

And now that Eliott was lying down on the grass petting Ouba and telling her repeatedly how cute and how much of a good girl she was, Lucas wanted to lie down beside him and play along up to the point where one of them would end up on top of the other, Eliott running his hand on Lucas’ cheek, looking at him with those hypnotising eyes, telling him that he was cute like he had done the other night.

Lucas went out of his haze when he felt the grass under his knees. He had gotten down on the floor while thinking and Lucas barely had time to realise it, that Eliott’s voice pierced his ears. “Ouba! Look, Lucas wants you to lick his face too!”

Probably influenced by Eliott’s excitement, Ouba ran to him and waved her tail excitedly as she scratched his lap for Lucas to take her up. He got the same treatment Ouba had given Eliott earlier, licking over his face, and Lucas laughed. “Alright, alright, I love you too princess.” He assured her as he put her down.

“We should probably get back.” Lucas then informed Eliott. As it was starting to get dark, he nodded and soon enough Ouba was on her leash again and they were walking back toward Lucas’ flat.

¤¤¤¤

Lucas still wasn’t completely sure how they got to the subject of soulmates, maybe it was because Lucas wondered if Eliott had met them already. “Come on Lucas, do I really look like I’m aging?” He had retorted and Lucas simply shrugged. Who was he to tell? When you meet them early in life it goes slowly as Arthur explained to him. So Eliott could very much be in love and have some small hints that are invisible to someone who wouldn’t be attentive.

Or maybe they came to this subject because Eliott kept glancing at him as if he was looking for something, as if he was trying to understand what Lucas had in mind. In any way, they started talking about soulmates which led to Lucas wondering about Yann and him.

“Do you think platonic soulmates exist?”

“Yeah of course.” Eliott had answered and to Lucas’ ears it sounded so sure. He wondered how Eliott could be so certain of it when he hadn’t heard about it during his long life. He didn’t have time to voice his question though as Eliott continued talking. “What would happen to ace and aro people otherwise? They’d be immortal?” The thought of it made him laugh and he didn’t realise Lucas’ confusion.

“Ace and aro?” He asked when Eliott’s laughter had died down.

“You don’t…” Eliott looked at him as if it was impossible for him not to know what that meant. “Okay. Aromantic and asexual people. They don’t feel sexual or romantic attraction. So if soulmates automatically meant a traditional relationship, they’d be screwed. Actually, it’s not that simple but I don’t want to say stupid stuff. I’m no expert but the general idea is here.”

Lucas had difficulties seeing how one could not feel those attractions. It was hormones and all that, it was something generic for humans, just like having a nose and two hands. He didn’t say that though, pretty sure Eliott would take it the wrong way. The last time he had said something that proved to be deeply wrong had been about AIDS, years ago and his ignorance had been thrown back at his face. He guessed he just couldn’t see the full picture.

However, this wasn’t exactly what he had in mind. “What about two people who never meet their soulmate and just coincidentally end up staying friends over the years?”

It was Eliott’s turn to be confused. “What do you mean?”

“Like, Yann and I, we’ve been friends since we were kids and none of us met our soulmate and we just kept being friends. But now he did meet someone and I’m just…” Lucas sighed, he wasn’t sure where he was going with it and even less sure about why he told Eliott this. What he was sure of, however, was that Eliott would take good hints at his age when he heard Lucas talk like that. After all, why would he be worried about that if he was still in his twenties?

“I don’t know what to say. I guess it’s just that friends are friends. And eventually they meet someone but I don’t think it has anything to do with aging or not.” Eliott tried to find an answer but really, he wasn’t the best person to ask about this. It wasn’t like he was an expert on the subject, he just had some beliefs about it.

“Yeah, no you’re right. Besides, it’s not like Yann and I are linked or that we aged together or whatever. It’s just a coincidence. We probably stick around because we’re in the same situation. Well, we were.”

“So he found his soulmate?”

“Yeah. A few weeks ago I think, he just told me.” Lucas shrugged, he didn’t really want to talk about that right now. There wasn’t much he wanted to talk about actually. He just preferred when it stayed out of personal business. And yet he was the one initiating such conversations. The irony.

“Good for him.” Eliott said with a smile. “I love to hear about people finding their soulmate, people deserve to be happy.”

“Even assholes?” Lucas wondered which made Eliott laugh.

“Yeah, even assholes. Because they most probably are matched with another asshole so they can annoy each other and leave other people alone.”

“That’s one way of seeing things.” Lucas wasn’t sure he followed Eliott’s track of thoughts but it still made him laugh to think it was just that easy.

Their steps slowly came to a halt and Eliott looked up at the building.

“Here we are.” Lucas responded to Eliott’s gaze.

“Do you want to-“

“I should go.”

They had spoken at the same time and Lucas quickly nodded. “Yeah, sure. Um, this was nice.”

“It really was.” Eliott confirmed with a smile. “We should do it again.”

“You mean you want to take Ouba out for a walk? That can be arranged.” Lucas replied with a grin. He just enjoyed the smile spreading on Eliott’s face and how he shook his head as if not believing what he heard.

“I’d love to. But I’d also love to see more of that bookcase you have upstairs.”

“Ah. Dogs and books.”

“Shut up.” Eliott retorted with a laugh. “Stop pretending you don’t understand.”

“Oh but I really don’t. Please, enlighten me!” Lucas requested.

He was standing in front of Eliott, hands linked in front of him and looking slightly up to meet Eliott’s eyes. Even though he was smaller than him he still tried to look provocative. He wasn’t sure it was working though because the only thing he could see on Eliott’s face was amusement.

“Well, I’d really enjoy spending more time with you. Whether that be in the park, looking at your bookcase or resting on your gigantic couch.”

A smile appeared on Lucas’ face, which he tried to contain because he felt like he would smile from ear to ear otherwise.

“I’ll have to see if I can clear my schedule then. You know having a dog, going to uni, having friends, it takes up a lot of time.”

“Oh I wouldn’t want to trouble your perfectly timed schedule but I hope you’ll find some time to be spontaneous. Or I would just have to start calling you old.”

That managed to make Lucas react because he raised his hand to tap Eliott’s arm. “Don’t call me old! Don’t you dare.” It was ridiculous because Arthur and Basile always called Yann and Lucas old men and that didn’t bother him but he didn’t want it to come from Eliott.

“At least I know how to annoy you.”

Lucas rolled his eyes and was about to retort something when he felt fingers on his chin, raising his face. “I really have to go. But I’ll see you soon.” Eliott said before leaning toward Lucas. He froze on the spot and then felt lips on his cheek.

“Bye Lucas.” Eliott said as he started walking backward. With one last look into his eyes, Eliott turned around and walked away.

It took a few seconds for Lucas to realise that he should go inside and Ouba barked when Lucas finally closed the door of the building. He looked down at her, still a bit dazzled and said. “Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll see him again soon enough.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this chapter as much as Lucas did... If so, leave a comment or kudos, it would make my day! 🧡
> 
> As always, if you want to chat about this or some other things, you can find me [here](https://diablots.tumblr.com/).   
> If you're curious about Lucas' place, you can see how I imagined it on the Sims with this [post](https://diablots.tumblr.com/post/615192200789311488/i-gave-a-lot-of-importance-to-lucas-flat-in-worth/).


	7. This was magical

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning ahead: In this chapter I use some medical biology terms. I have literally no idea how it works, so I'm sorry if my use of words is inaccurate.  
> Alright you can continue now.
> 
> How you'll like this chapter, don't forget to leave me feedback 😊
> 
> As always you can find me on [tumblr](https://diablots.tumblr.com/).

Lucas had been quite distracted and Imane had to snap her fingers in front of his eyes for him to come back to himself.

“Hey! Earth to Lucas! We’re working here.” She snapped her fingers a good five times before Lucas shook his head and looked at her. She was pissed, there was no doubt in that. “If I had known all you’d do is daydream, I would have done this alone.”

“No, sorry. I’m here, focused.”

“Right.”

Lucas did want to succeed in this class and wanted to help Imane doing this project right but since that evening he couldn’t help letting his mind wander back to it, wondering what would have happened if Eliott had stayed longer or if they hadn’t been in the park during this whole time. Mostly, he couldn’t help but think about the bliss face Eliott had just before holding Lucas’ chin in his hand.

“Okay, we’re taking a break.” Imane decided as she put her pen down. They had been at this for three hours now. With both of their schedules being quite full, finding time to meet and work on the project actually proved difficult so when they realised they both had this particular Thursday free, they had taken the occasion to work on it for several hours. Lucas swears he had planned to be more productive than that.

They had decided to focus on hormonology but since they were first years they didn’t have access to labs yet. All their projects were supposed to be based on previous studies and theories. They had researched through it on their own and now had to compare their results to narrow the focus down. Thankfully they were almost the last group to present their project to the class so they still had two months before having to finish it.

Lucas was glad he was doing this with Imane. That girl was determined to do great and so had started working on it early on, which forced Lucas to do the same. If he had been alone he would have started one or two weeks before the deadline and probably wouldn’t have gotten the grade he’d have expected. This is why he also felt kind of bad for daydreaming when they were supposed to work.

“What have you got on your mind?” Imane wondered. She was looking at him, arms crossed on the table.

Lucas hadn’t known her for a long time, barely a few weeks where they saw each other only during this particular class, but he could feel she was the kind of person he liked to be around. She was fierce and never let him get away with his shit. Lucas liked to be confronted like that, although he’d never admit it, just like she wouldn’t admit she had a soft spot for him.

“Nothing in particular.” It’s not that Lucas didn’t want to share whatever happened with Eliott but… well, he didn’t.

“It wouldn’t happen to do with Eliott?”

Shit. How would she know that? He looked at her with a terrified and shocked face which seemed to be enough to convince Imane it actually was.

“I knew it!” She said triumphantly. “I wasn’t sure he was talking about you but it seemed to make sense.”

“What are you talking about?” Lucas was hesitating between thinking Imane was a witch or just a really good stalker.

“Eliott’s a good friend of my brother, he comes over to our house quite often. The last time he was talking about a guy he met at a party and he had asked for your number a few days earlier so it wasn’t difficult to connect the dots.”

“He was talking about me?” Lucas let out before he had time to stop himself. “Wait, it came out way too enthusiastically. I mean, it’s chill. You know. We just saw each other.”

He should know he wouldn’t be able to make her believe it was ‘chill’ when he’s done nothing but overreact since she pronounced his name.

“Right. Well if it’s just chill, it doesn’t matter.” Imane said with a smile. “I’ll go get us coffee and we can get back to these hormones.” She got up and walked to the library’s coffee machines with a grin on her lips, as if she was the keeper of a great secret.

Lucas didn’t have time to reply anything. Instead, he groaned and let his head rest on his arms, eyes closed in despair. He had been so easy to read and had given Imane the proof of something he had just started getting accustomed to, something he didn’t know the meaning of yet.

Back to hormonology it is, then.

Once Lucas was focusing on the subject again, they managed to get a good bunch of the project done. There was still a lot to do but they had the introduction and the plan laid out, along with the important points to discuss during the different sections of their talk. They didn’t have all the information on hand so they’d still have a lot of research to do but that was something more effective when done individually. By the end of the afternoon Lucas was proud of what they got but mostly Imane was happy with it and Lucas felt that if he got her approval, then he was on the right track.

¤¤¤¤

It was the end of February but it sure didn’t feel like it. The sun was shining bright, temperature almost warm and Lucas absolutely loved this day of good weather breaking through the coldness of winter. So when he had one hour to spare between classes, he decided to go outside and take a sun bath.

He was sitting on a bench comfortably, sunglasses on his eyes, jacket open and face turned toward the blue sky. He wasn’t the only one who had taken advantage of the weather but it was rather quiet still because they were in the middle of an hour and people who were on campus were mostly in class right now.

This is the exact reason why he noticed Yann further away. What intrigued Lucas and made him not call out for his friend immediately was that he walked toward someone. A woman. It wasn’t anyone that Lucas recognised but as Yann leaned in to kiss her, recognition appeared on his face. That was Sarah.

Shit.

Should he leave them alone then? Pretend he didn’t see them? It would be easy. But did Lucas really want that? He was bound to meet Sarah eventually. At least this was casual and Lucas had to go back to class quickly enough. Lucas looked around himself and when he noticed there weren’t that many people around him, he figured that if Yann looked his way he’d see him anyway. Still, was he ready to meet her?

Those questions stayed in his mind until he saw the both of them start to walk away. He didn’t think then and shouted “Yann!” He waved his hand until his friend caught sight of him. He saw him turn to Sarah and then she was the one looking at him. With one nod from her, they were now walking toward Lucas. He couldn’t really back out anymore now, could he?

“Lucas, hey.” Yann was now close enough that they could talk without waking the person who was napping on the grass further away. “This is Sarah.”

It was a weird feeling because Yann seemed uncomfortable, but not in a way that made Lucas believe he was afraid of his reaction toward her. Lucas wasn’t sure how to read the fact that Yann was fidgeting, holding dearly onto Sarah’s hand.

“Nice to meet you.” Lucas said with a smile. He was sure Sarah knew who he was already but when Yann didn’t make any move to present him, he took the opportunity. “I’m Lucas, the guy you’ll have to deal with if you spend the entire length of forever with him.”

Sarah laughed softly. She had a cute laugh, it went well with her soft brown eyes and small figure. “I’ve heard about you. If that’s all it takes then I’m more than willing to put up with you just like Yann does.”

“Oh I see Yann told you all about us, already. You’re no fun, bro.” Lucas eyed his best friend who seemed to have relaxed slightly. “Don’t worry, Sarah, I’ll tell you all about the things he doesn’t want you to know.”

“Deal.” Sarah was quick to answer, amused and Yann didn’t get the chance to retort anything. “I’m sorry but we have to go though. The cinema isn’t going to wait for us.”

“You’re going to the cinema with this weather?”

“No judgement.” Sarah warned him.

As they started walking away, Yann turned around to look at Lucas once more. “You’re not allowed to say anything.” Yann still warned Lucas, who brushed him off with a wave of the hand. He then smiled and Lucas smiled back at him. Relaxed, Yann finally walked away with Sarah. Maybe, despite the situation, he just wanted Lucas’ approval.

Once he was alone again, Lucas let his thought wander back to everything and anything. Mostly to Eliott, if he was being honest. It’s on the next Saturday that he hearh about him again. He had just gotten back from his morning walk with Ouba when his phone buzzed.

> **Eliott (9:30am)**
> 
> What are you doing today?
> 
> _Lucas (9:35am)_
> 
> Nothing special. Working on a uni project probably.
> 
> **Eliott (9:36am)**
> 
> The whole day?!
> 
> _Lucas (9:38am)_
> 
> No. Of course not. I just haven’t planned anything. What about you?
> 
> **Eliott (9:39am)**
> 
> Nothing either.
> 
> Hey maybe we could do nothing together.
> 
> _Lucas (9:40am)_
> 
> What do you suggest?
> 
> **Eliott (9:40am)**
> 
> Your place? I’ll bring snacks. I need to try your couch.
> 
> _Lucas (9:41am)_
> 
> Oh so my couch is the only reason you want to come over.
> 
> **Eliott (9:43am)**
> 
> Don’t be stupid. I want to see Ouba too.
> 
> _Lucas (9:43am)_
> 
> :(
> 
> **Eliott (9:43am)**
> 
> (:
> 
> _Lucas (9:44am)_
> 
> I do have to work on that project anyway. I’ll leave you with the couch.
> 
> **Eliott (9:45am)**
> 
> I can bring work too if you don’t want to feel alone.
> 
> _Lucas (9:52am)_
> 
> Hm… Fine. I guess studying with you around doesn’t sound too bad.
> 
> **Eliott (9:54am)**
> 
> Yay! I’ll be there beginning of the afternoon.

¤¤¤¤

True to his words, Lucas heard the doorbell ring at precisely one in the afternoon and he buzzed Eliott in. After properly saying hi to Ouba for five minutes straight, Eliott walked around the flat, Lucas being painfully aware that he was observing rather than just looking around. Eliott had this power of reading into things without difficulties and Lucas wasn’t sure he liked how easily that guy seemed to read him. And yet, he didn’t want to stop Eliott from doing so.

“Your flat is fascinating.” He ended up saying, turning back to look at Lucas. He was standing in front of his old bookshelf as it had been the last thing he had looked at. “Your kitchen is normal, I guess, the living room too, modern. I mean it feels grown up, but actually what makes it feel that way is because it’s really impersonal, I think.”

Lucas looked at him, intrigued. He didn’t like his observing skills but he still found interesting to hear what Eliott had to say.

“This part though…” Eliott was turned toward the second part of the living room where Lucas had his bookshelf, among other things. “It seems like you put more work into it. The furniture is older too.”

Lucas had a fireplace, a piano and a bookshelf, each placed against a different wall. It was older because the fireplace still looked like when he had bought the flat and the piano and bookshelves were things he took from his dad’s place when they sold the house. Eliott was right because this was the part of the room where Lucas let himself decorate like he wanted, it was nostalgia. It felt warm, not only from the glowing fire that he had turned on before Eliott arrived but also because it was much more personal. 

“This feels like you.” Eliott repeated quietly, pressing on some of the piano’s keys softly so that a whisper of the notes could be heard. “And it confuses me even more about your age.”

Lucas approached and walked past him to look at the bookshelf. There were old books in there, some even older than him. Sometimes, he wondered if some of these book copies were worth a lot because they were in near perfect state. There were newest books too and none of them were stored in a particular way. When he got a new book he just put it wherever there was space, maybe the way he put his books on this bookshelf represented his life: a mess.

He grabbed one book and opened it to the first page where a quote was written. “What am I but a soul lost in time?” Lucas read it out aloud, his back still facing Eliott. He looked at the name of the author. It started with an A. He pushed the books on the top shelf slightly and put this one on the far left of the shelf, where authors with the name starting with A would be if it was stored by author’s name. Maybe he was starting to fix that mess.

“Lucas.” Eliott’s voice was soft, maybe even a little hesitant. He had walked closer to Lucas but still stayed a few feet away, unsure on how to react. His first instinct was to comment on the quote but he had a feeling that this was more about Lucas than the quote itself.

Lucas turned around and, when looking at Eliott, seemed to realise he had drifted off slightly. “Sorry.” He said quickly after. “I’m just not used to people being this…” He struggled to find the word and Eliott seemed to realise it.

“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be this forward. People usually tell me I’m too curious.”

“It’s fine. I mean, I don’t let a lot of people in here and none of them are that observant. For them it’s just… old relics.”

“It’s beautiful.” Eliott immediately assured him. “I wasn’t trying to intrude. I do find all of it fascinating. I like how different it feels to be in this little part of your flat.”

“It’s because of the fire place.”

Eliot got the hint that he didn’t want to dwell too much on it. “I don’t think that’s it.” He assured him but didn’t push, instead shoving his shoulder gently. “Hey, I still have to try that couch. It looks so comfy!”

“Well go on then, no one’s stopping you.” Lucas said with a laugh, relieved but also genuinely amused, especially when Eliott looked at him with those excited eyes before he went to sprawl out on it with a delighted hum.

After Eliott complimented Lucas one more time on his excellent taste in couch, they decided to go to the kitchen to study. Eliott had argued with Lucas that the fact he didn’t have a desk further confirmed that Lucas had been out of studying for a long time, even more so when Lucas assured him that there were no desk in the rooms upstairs either.

¤¤¤¤

Eliott had brought many snacks, way too many and they had barely enough space on the table to put their papers and computers. “Were you afraid that we’d be starving?” Lucas wondered as he looked through everything he brought. It was a mix of sweet and salty things, candies, crisps, chocolate, cheese, pop corn. “Since when is cheese a snack?”

“Don’t underestimate the power of cheese.” Eliott warned him as he took a piece, grinning at Lucas. “And I wasn’t afraid we’d starve, I just didn’t know how long I’d be here. You wouldn’t want us not to have anything to eat at two in the morning.”

“Two, huh? You think I’ll still want you around here then?”

Eliott looked at him outraged. “You mean you’re planning on making me go away at some point? You’re not keeping me forever? I’m warning you, I’m taking Ouba as comfort!”

“Not Ouba!” Lucas reflected Eliott’s face, how could he even consider taking Ouba away from him?

“Then I’m staying here.” Eliott started to negotiate. “No bargaining it’s both of us or a dognapping.”

“What a terrible choice I have to make.” Lucas said, sighing dramatically. “In that case, I guess it is my duty to keep you around.”

“Yay!” Eliott let out excitedly and grabbed a chocolate bar.

“Are you seriously eating chocolate after you ate cheese?”

“Life isn’t linear, Lu, and neither are chocolate and cheese.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Lucas told him. He looked unimpressed but the thing he chose to remember from Eliott’s words is the nickname. It was ridiculous because Lu wasn’t such an uncommon nickname for his name but hearing it from Eliott felt different.

“I’m studying and therefore don’t hear you anymore.”

True to his words, Lucas didn’t manage to get Eliott’s attention anymore, no matter how he waved his hand between Eliott’s eyes and his laptop’s screen. Finally Lucas resolved himself to studying too.

They are quite silent in the beginning, each working on their own assignment. Lucas was actually surprised to see Eliott study so seriously. Not that he didn’t believe he could concentrate, of course, but when Eliott offered to study together he really thought they wouldn’t get much done, distracting the other every few minutes.

Yet, both of them worked religiously for almost two hours, the sound of candy wrapper being the only thing disturbing the silence. Lucas saved the document he was working on and leaned against his chair with a sigh. Eliott gazed at him sideways and, when Lucas hadn’t started writing again in the next minute, he looked at him. “Something wrong?”

“If I have to read another paper on thyroid dysfunction, I think I might die.” Lucas complained with another exaggerated sigh.

Eliott could only sympathy with him, just hearing the word made him want to stay the furthest away from the subject as he could. “Maybe it’s time for a break.”

“If we have a break now, I feel like we’re not going back to it.” He pointed out.

“Maybe that’s my point.” Eliott seemed nonchalant about it and Lucas guessed that two hours of studying would be good enough for now.

“Maybe we should do that then.” He confirmed, grabbing some chocolate. Before he could have a bite though, the chocolate was taken away from his hands. “Hey!” He protested but Eliott had already retreated to the living room. His excitement woke Ouba up and she barked at him in annoyance.

“Sorry.” He said quietly and kissed her head. “Come get it.” He then said to Lucas.

He raised an eyebrow at Eliott and, without looking away, reached out on the table to take another chocolate bar.

“No! That’s cheating!” As quickly as he left, he was back in the kitchen and grabbed the second chocolate bar out of Lucas’ hands.

“You know we can do that forever, considering the amount of snacks there is left.” Lucas sounded amused and was already reaching out for something else but when he noticed Eliott’s sad face, he stopped.

“I really have to chase you down to get chocolate then?” He wondered and as an only answer, Eliott nodded enthusiastically, a wide smile on his lips.

Lucas rushed toward him but Eliott was faster and took a couple steps back. It went like this, Lucas trying to get Eliott by surprise and Eliott always somehow managing to escape him, until they were against a wall.

“Can’t go very far now, can you?” Lucas was now smiling, sure that he had won when Eliott held his hands up and away from Lucas’ grasp. “No! Now, that’s cheating!” Lucas stared at the chocolates, way too high for him. He wouldn’t lean up on his tiptoes to try and grab them. He wouldn’t. But Eliott’s gaze was provocative and Lucas wasn’t about to let him get away so easily. So he leaned in, close to Eliott and reached his hands up to force Eliott’s arms down.

He wasn’t succeeding, it turns out that Eliott was quite strong and no matter how much Lucas pulled on his arm, he wouldn’t move, so Lucas decided to change strategy. It was risky and he actually wasn’t a hundred percent sure how Eliott would react but it was worth it, he decided, when he saw Eliott’s gaze once more.

Lucas didn’t look away. He kept his gaze straight on Eliott and stepped that much closer until they were almost chest to chest. He saw in his eyes the moment Eliott realised their closeness, he noticed his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed and how his lips parted slightly. Grabbing his arm and getting on his tiptoe, this time only to get his face closer to Eliott’s, Lucas let himself be hypnotised by the situation. Almost forgetting, what he was doing in the first place, Lucas let his eyes trail down on Eliott’s lips, wondering for a moment if… He looked back up and when he met his eyes again, Lucas felt Eliott’s arms relax, moving down slowly.

Lucas grinned at him, the movement taking him out of his trance and he pulled on Eliott’s arms stealing the two chocolate bars. Before Eliott had time to register what happened, he rushed to the couch where Ouba had fallen asleep again.

“I have Ouba, you can’t harm me!” He said after Eliott shook his head and shouted his protest at how unfair what Lucas did was. “But see, me, I’m nice. So I’m going to share.” He said and handed one chocolate bar to Eliott.

He ended up taking it, not without repeating how it shouldn’t have happened, that he couldn’t believe he fell for this so easily and that Lucas had no right, on top of that, to make himself the bigger man in being nice and sharing. Lucas just found all of that adorable.

¤¤¤¤

It was late afternoon, the movie they had watched was over and now the DVD menu was playing in the background in a loop. Eliott had found fun and totally relatable the fact that Lucas was the kind of guy who still owned many, many DVDs. Eventually, Lucas sighed and grabbed the remote to turn the TV off. It was getting dark outside and soon they would have to turn the light on to see each other.

Eliott kept glancing behind the couch, where the piano was sitting. He wouldn’t dare talk though, unsure on how to act, considering Lucas’ reaction earlier. Despite the darkening light, Lucas did catch it and he smiled slightly. “Go on.” He said and when Eliott turned at him with surprised eyes, he added. “Ask whatever you have in mind.”

Eliott didn’t immediately say anything, still slightly unsure but this time his gaze lingered on the piano for longer. “Would you play for me?” He asked, not looking away from it.

Lucas couldn’t say he was surprised, he had noted how interested by the piano Eliott had been. And even though his first instinct was to hesitate, he tried not to show it to Eliott. He was the one who asked him to talk and he didn’t want the guy to feel guilty about it. “Okay.” He said quietly.

“Really?” If Lucas was still slightly hesitant when he answered, Eliott’s enthusiasm was enough to finish convincing him. So he nodded and got up.

Turning the light on, he quickly took place in front of the piano while Eliott made a move to sit on the armchair positioned next to it.

“Please don’t… Not here.” Lucas immediately worried when he realised what Eliott was doing. He was about to ask why but when he noticed a sad expression on Lucas’ face, he didn’t argue. Lucas was staring at the empty place and closed his eyes to tear them away from it. He could still see his mom sitting there during the afternoons she was allowed to get out of the institute.

Instead, Eliott took place on the floor, right next to the fireplace which, even though wasn’t as warm as earlier, still emitted this feeling of comfort, the smell of burned wood.

Lucas played on the keys slightly, testing them as if to get a feel of the instrument. Sure it was his and he was used to playing it but since he had started university he hadn’t touched it that often. He thought about what to play. He could play something soft, something easy or on the contrary choose a difficult piece to impress him. He wasn’t sure what Eliott was looking for when he asked him to play.

“If playing means pressing random keys, I can do it too.” Eliott took him out of his reverie and he chuckled, turning toward him.

“Shush. I’m concentrating.” Lucas retorted with a chuckle.

Lucas went back to his thoughts, wondering what he should play. There were many pieces he could decide on but a specific one just kept coming in his mind. It wasn’t supposed to be his first choice and it was one that normally no one could hear him play but it felt right in the moment so Lucas let his fingers press the first keys. His eyes stayed on the piano, not because he needed to see where he put his fingers but rather because he didn’t want to let his mind wander too far away. It was his mom’s favourite piece.

Behind him, he couldn’t see Eliott’s expression go from surprise to being impressed to simply being hypnotised. When Eliott had asked him to play, it was simply because he liked hearing live music. He loved it when people were able to create sound, to give music life. It was also a great feeling to just listen to someone playing for him exclusively. But now that he was hearing him, he just couldn’t believe his ears. It was beautiful and even more than that, it was mesmerizing. Lucas seemed completely lost in the music and Eliott could feel the emotion that the piece wanted to relay. He could only see Lucas’ back and part of his hands playing on the piano and he was sure that Lucas’ face had to be even more expressive. Tears welled in his eyes and when the music stopped, he had to blink a few times to make the feeling go away.

He and Lucas stayed like that, without moving. Lucas’ fingers were hovering over the piano and Eliott was staring at his back. It was as if time had stopped for a moment, for them to take their breath back and come back down on Earth.

Eventually, as Lucas started to move, Eliott breathed out. “This was magical.” His eyes met Lucas’ and he wasn’t sure what to read in them, even though he was usually good at doing that. “I loved it, thank you.” He wanted to ask for more, wanted this moment to never stop but he also wanted it to stay like this, perfect and out of time.

Lucas couldn’t find his words so he simply smiled. He hadn’t expected how he would feel either. It felt like they just created a key moment in their relationsh– friendship. Lucas immediately corrected himself. When they realised they might have been staring at each other for just slightly too long, they both looked away.

From that moment, the air between them stayed special, as if there was a constant pull that they were feeling stronger than before. As special as it felt it also made them tiptoe around the other, as if one wasn’t sure how the other would act if they made one wrong step. When Lucas told Eliott he had to take Ouba out, Eliott decided he had to leave.

Lucas couldn’t hide his disappointment. He had hoped Eliott would stay longer, take her out and then eat dinner with him. It was Saturday night so it wasn’t like they had to be anywhere the next day. However, Eliott didn’t want this moment to vanish in the open air. He wanted to keep it between them and somehow didn’t want to share how he was feeling around Lucas with any stranger outside just yet. Eliott didn’t express all of that though, he couldn’t figure out how to put it into words for Lucas to understand this feeling.

“You keep the snacks for next time.” Eliott said with a smile when he was ready to leave. He had his hands deep in his pockets and was standing in front of Lucas.

Lucas still didn’t understand why Eliott suddenly decided to leave but if he was talking about next time, it couldn’t be too bad. He couldn’t put words on what happened once he finished playing but if Eliott felt even half what he did, then it had to be something special.

They were staring into each other’s eyes and Eliott didn’t seem to be in a hurry to leave. Staying in front of the other for what felt like forever, they got distracted when Ouba barked next to them. She really wanted to go out now. Lucas let out a soft chuckle.

“Well. I really should go.” Eliott finally let out. He took a deep breath and, instead of stepping back toward the door, stepped closer to Lucas. Holding his chin, just like the last time, he pressed his lips against Lucas’ before he had time to change his mind.

Lucas took a sharp breath in and, as soon as he registered what was happening, moved his lips against Eliott’s. They kissed slowly, lips against lips and Eliott pulled back before they had time to go further into it. They stared at each other again and Lucas was breathing just that slightly faster.

“Eliott.”

Eliott didn’t reply anything. He pecked Lucas’ lips again and then moved out of the flat without any further word. Maybe this could stay here too, for the moment.

When he took Ouba out, Lucas had a big smile on his face, so had he when he cooked dinner, watched a movie, brushed his teeth and went to bed. He slept well, although he woke up several times during the night. Every time he did, it was only to be met with the memory of what they did during the afternoon, Eliott smiling, Eliott laughing, Eliott staring at him, Eliott being concentrated, Eliott kissing him. He had never felt like that before, not with any of the guys he had kissed.

¤¤¤¤

Lucas was bringing the toothbrush to his teeth the next morning when he met his own eyes in the mirror. He let his toothbrush fall in the sink when he saw it. Leaning closer to the mirror, he stared at the side of his eyes for longer than he should have, his heart beating fast. There, on the corner of his eyes, he could see crow’s feet wrinkles. Or so he thought. It wasn’t really clear, as if it was just forming but he was certain that they hadn’t been there the day before. Could it be…? Lucas wouldn’t let himself hope too much. But what he felt the day before, those feelings he couldn’t put words on, it seemed like what Yann had told him, when he couldn’t find words himself.

He checked his eyes for longer, making sure it wasn’t just his mind making it up. He scratched them, washed his face and then finally stepped back. He was still looking in the mirror and a smile formed on his lips despite himself. Deep down, he was almost sure it was exactly what he thought it was.

Well, shit.

He grabbed his phone that he had left in his room, unplugged it and wrote a quick message to Eliott.

> _Lucas (9:14am)_
> 
> I really enjoyed yesterday. All of it. I hope I’ll see you again soon.

His message stayed unanswered for the whole day.


	8. You got caught up

Not receiving an answer straight away didn’t bother Lucas more than that. He still wasn’t completely sure the stripes in the corner of his eyes were wrinkles but if they were, it felt right. After all, he had never felt close to someone that quickly. Usually closeness terrified him, but this time he would have let Eliott stay the whole weekend if he had wanted to.

A few weeks ago, he would have been the first to run away when realising that he was aging. He would have been certain it couldn’t be Eliott. The only reason it would have been possible was if Eliott had lied about his age. But now that he saw Yann’s situation and felt that way around Eliott, he was ready to dive in it. He also thought about Yann and the fact that they didn’t have to part ways in the end.

He felt dreamy during the whole day. He had a wide smile and greeted everyone when he took Ouba out, played with her for longer than usual and even cooked a proper meal even though he usually used Sundays to be lazy and not do any task in his flat. He also played the piano. The piece he had played for Eliott and some others, joyful, fast paced. Pieces which never failed to lighten his mood.

He spent the day on this little cloud of happiness and that’s when he realised he had always believed in soulmates, despite his parents being unlucky about their own. Before it all happened, he had been worried about how it would go, how to truly figure out someone was meant for you, how they would deal with being older. But now that he had started aging, he realised he wasn’t afraid at all. He wasn’t afraid to love. Wasn’t afraid of letting Eliott in. Wasn’t afraid of tomorrow.

And yet, tomorrow came and he still hadn’t gotten an answer from Eliott. He blamed the lack of answer on Sunday on Eliott being busy or working, maybe being with his family. He went to bed feeling cheerful still and had dreamt about him again. He had hoped to wake up to a text but that didn’t happen.

He tried not to overthink it. Yes, they had been talking almost constantly for a few weeks now but Eliott was allowed not to answer straight away, even after such an important afternoon. And after a kiss. There had to be an explanation. So, Lucas simply decided to send him another text, wishing him a good day, before going to class. He also sent one to the group chat with the guys, asking them to meet on campus at four, after their own classes.

He wanted to tell them. He was so sure that he hadn’t mistaken these wrinkles for anything else and he just wanted to share with them how excited he was. He had checked himself in the mirror way too often, he also compared it with pictures of actual wrinkles and, even without all that, he just felt that it was right. He put the hood of his sweatshirt up so it wouldn’t be too obvious just now and greeted his friends when they finally arrived.

The weather wasn’t as merciful as the last week and they had to wear heavy coats, scarves and gloves again. They wouldn’t enjoy staying outside so they decided to move to a coffee shop nearby that Arthur had discovered recently. It was small and cosy. There were armchairs, couches and tables, it had everything to feel at ease and it never felt too crowded due to its size.

“Are you finally going to tell us what’s going on?” Arthur wondered once they were all sitting down on two couches facing each other.

Lucas simply grinned. He thought about making them wait just this much longer because it was fun seeing them excited and worried at the same time, considering they didn’t know what was going on. His heart was beating hard though and he probably wouldn’t have lasted too long anymore, so he put his coffee down on the table and took his hood off.

Not saying a word, he looked at each one of them in the eyes, seeing clear confusion on their faces. He chuckled softly, head hanging low before looking up and directly at Yann. “Come on, don’t you notice anything?”

Yann tilted his head and studied Lucas’ face with attention and finally his mouth opened on its own accord.

“There it is.” Lucas said and brought his hand up to the corner of his eyes, rubbing the spot. A wide smile appeared on his face while Yann processed the information, but Basile and Arthur still seemed confused about what was happening.

“Why do you have something subtle like that and I get grey hair that no one can miss?!”

“Wait what?” Arthur, who was sitting next to Lucas, grabbed him by the arm so he could get a proper look at him. After a few more seconds, his eyes widened in turn. “Oh my god, is this…?”

“I met someone.” Lucas nodded and couldn’t help the little peak of enthusiasm at the end of his sentence.

Basile followed his eagerness by shouting excitedly, earning them glares from the other customers but they just were all so excited for Lucas that they couldn’t care.

Once they managed to calm down, Lucas finally got to explain the whole story. He laughed as he saw them all focused on him. He probably would have never managed to get their attention under any other circumstances.

“Remember Idriss’ birthday party? I met him then. It was a short meeting but I just… got hypnotised by him, I guess. After that he got my number and we started texting. A lot.”

“Is it the reason your phone kept buzzing when I came to your place the other weekend?” Yann had interrupted him, when he connected the dots.

“Yeah. That was him. But things accelerated last week. I saw him on Tuesday, we took Ouba out and spoke a lot. I wanted to invite him over after that but he had to leave. And then I saw him on Saturday, we spent the whole afternoon together, studying, watching movie, talking again, um… I played the piano too. I played one of my mom’s favourite pieces.” It wasn’t important information, but he just felt like sharing it.

“Wait. I had to wait years until you’d play that stuff in front of me. You’d barely even play, I had to bring the guitar along if I wanted to hear your piano.” Yann couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing.

Lucas smiled sheepishly at him. “I couldn’t resist those eyes.” He was pretty sure everything could be excused when you had Eliott’s eyes. He jumped slightly when he felt Arthur nudge him with his elbow.

“Aw, look at him. He’s smitten, all embarrassed, acting like a boy and his first crush. I think we found a way to make our grumpy grandpa not so grumpy anymore.” Arthur’s voice was teasing and the boys laughed along with him but their smile showed how it came from the best intentions and how they actually were happy for him.

“Shut up.” Lucas retorted, a slight blush creeping on his cheeks. He should have expected to be teased that way, really. “Anyway, he kissed me when he left and the next morning I noticed those little wrinkles. I wasn’t sure it was wrinkles at first but it just makes sense.”

“Have you talked to him about it?” Yann wondered.

“No.” Lucas said, losing his smile. “He hasn’t replied to my messages since Sunday morning. He’s probably busy or something.”

“Busy after kissing his soulmate? Sounds fake.” Basile decreed, shaking his head. “Is there any reason he might have done that? Like, did you too talk about the subject?”

“We did, briefly, I just… I don’t know, okay. It’s probably not even related. I don’t want to think of the worst when I just realised I met the one, okay?” Lucas made quotation marks with his hands at those last words but he really didn’t want to dwell on the subject.

His friends seemed to respect that because the next thing he heard was Basile complaining. “It’s not fair that it’s so easy for you! Look, I’m happy with Daphné but I’d love to have a confirmation at least, you know? Some sign showing that I’m not going to lose her.”

“Being actually old has its perks, I guess.” Lucas said with a shrug. This was the exact reason why he never managed to get in a relationship until now. The fear of seeing the person go away with someone else and being left alone.

“You’re not going to lose her dude, she’s head over heels for you too.” Arthur assured him with a wink.

The conversation moved on from there and Yann looked at him with a grin. “Now we can have double dates and all that stupid shit.” He pointed out and after Lucas nodded, amused, they both joined Arthur’s and Basile’s conversation.

¤¤¤¤

Not much happened on Tuesday. Nor did it on Wednesday or Thursday. Lucas still hadn’t gotten an answer from Eliott and now he was actually growing worried. He had sent a text or two, they had all been delivered but not answered. Was it something that Lucas had done or said? Did something happen to him making him unable to answer, an accident? Lucas’ mind went from plausible scenarios up to the worst ones but none of them convinced him.

Gone was the cloud of happiness. He was still glad he had met Eliott but was now worried it wasn’t reciprocal. It wouldn’t make sense at all but it was the only reason he could come up with which sounded at least plausible. On Friday, when he walked in the room for his medical biology class and saw Imane sitting there, he realised she was his chance of getting some news.

He rushed to sit down next to her and almost slammed his bag on the table. “Imane. I need your help.”

Imane, who had jumped in surprise when Lucas arrived so suddenly, looked at him suspiciously. “Why would you need my help?”

“Um…” Lucas looked at her and then away, unsure on how to phrase it, unsure if she would even have any information to give him. “Have you heard anything about Eliott this week?”

Lucas was fully expecting her to tease him because he was admitting he wanted to know about Eliott but he was ready to retort something which would make her shut up. He was pretty sure his face wasn’t screaming excitement anyway. But when he saw her expression slowly become sad, or maybe sorry, he feared the worst.

“I have.” She admitted. She didn’t continue straight away, sighing a few times, as if looking for her words. She was definitely acting like someone would when they had bad news to announce. “He came over on Sunday afternoon.”

_**~** _

Imane had been taking the clothes her mom had washed to put them in her closet when she heard Eliott’s voice coming from her brother’s room. “It’s all wrong, Idriss.” She stayed in the hallway, leaning against the wall, her curiosity winning the better of her.

“At least I agree on that, you need to stop playing with people.” Idriss sounded pissed at Eliott. He very rarely sounded pissed at him.

“I don’t play! My interest is genuine” Eliott, on the other hand, sounded like he was trying to prove his point.

“Sure it is. And then you just push people away when it gets too serious. Call it what you want, I say it’s playing with them. I have to say you’ve never pulled back that fast though.” Imane had difficulties telling how his brother felt. She knew he was pissed but Idriss couldn’t stay mad at Eliott usually.

“It wasn’t supposed to happen this fast.”

“It never happens like it’s supposed to. You got caught up in your own game.”

“I’ll say it again, it’s not a game.” Eliott had raised his voice, possibly annoyed that Idriss seemed to be missing his point. “Look at this. It doesn’t make any sense.”

“What do you want me to say? You want to stop talking to that guy? Then do. But I won’t always support you in this.”

“Idriss.” Eliott’s voice was quiet, but when Idriss replied, it was suddenly way closer to Imane.

“I’m going to get us drinks.” He said and Imane just had time to step into her room when Idriss appeared in the hallway.

_**~** _

“I didn’t hear anything else.” Imane said, looking at Lucas’ face which slowly fell. “Look, I don’t even know if they were talking about you. And, if they were, I’m sure there’s more to it. I couldn’t see them, and I didn’t hear all of the conversation. I’m sure there’s an explanation.”

“It sounded pretty clear to me. Eliott doesn’t want anything serious and for some reason he decided a kiss was too much.”

“You kissed?” Before Imane had the chance to continue on the subject though, Lucas was saved by their teacher who came in the room.

“Forget it.” He whispered and turned his attention away from her.

Imane did let it go and Lucas couldn’t be more grateful about it.

¤¤¤¤

If Lucas still had a reason to be hopeful during the week even without Eliott reaching out to him, it wasn’t the case anymore. Even if Imane hadn’t heard the whole conversation, the words “game”, “playing with people” and “pushing them away” were enough of an indication. Lucas had been too caught up in this, too fast. He had really been a fool for thinking that Eliott would want something serious with him. He was both angry at himself and wanted to cry.

The few times before, it had always been him who broke whatever relationship he had growing with the guy so he hadn’t felt the pang in his heart. Yes, he had been sad somehow, sorry for the other guys because they all seemed nice. But now that he was on the other end of it, he felt like he wouldn’t ever get over it.

The worst thing was that he had truly believed Eliott was his soulmate. He had seen it, seen how it could happen and already imagined being by his side against everything. It worked between them, they had barely spent two afternoons together and yet it felt right. Now, not only did he realise Eliott was playing him but on top of that he had a sign of age and had no idea who else it could be.

Of course it came to his mind that maybe it was Eliott anyway but then why would he push Lucas away? He’d have no way of knowing. They hadn’t seen each other, hell, they hadn’t even texted since then. So what if it was part of his game and he realised he went too far with the kiss? Maybe Eliott was just curious about him. He had talked about his age every time they had met. Maybe this was it, Eliott just wanted to crack him, figure him out.

Lucas opened up to him, he showed him his house, played for him, basically gave him all the clues to solve the mystery of his age and now that Eliott got his answer he wasn’t interested in him anymore. It made sense. The kiss was just a mistake made on the way. It made sense.

But now Lucas was stuck aging without a soulmate. He wasn’t sure which solution was the best, having met him but not having realised because he was too caught up with Eliott or him being Eliott and then be stuck with someone who doesn’t want him.

The first solution didn’t seem logical for him. He hadn’t met anyone that he had put his focus on. These age marks weren’t supposed to happen just by bumping shoulders. A connection is supposed to be there and Lucas couldn’t remember it happening with anyone else than Eliott.

The second solution wasn’t better because convincing someone that they’re your soulmate isn’t an easy task when the other isn’t interested and doesn’t even want to talk to you anymore. Lucas could already see his next text. _Hi, Eliott. I know you don’t care about me but hey, no luck, I’m almost sure you’re my soulmate because I have wrinkles now. I know it’s weird because it’s not supposed to happen out of a sudden but it might have to do with the fact that I’m old enough to be your grandpa._

“Fuck!” Ouba was sleeping on her cushion next to the fireplace and Lucas shouted so loudly that it woke her up at a start.

What was he supposed to do now? He was contemplating staying on his couch and not moving for the next hour or three days when he got a message.

> **Imane (7:36pm)**
> 
> I don’t mean to pry, but if I wanted to see Eliott, I’d go to the second years’ exhibition tomorrow at the school he attends.

¤¤¤¤

So that’s how Lucas ended up the next morning at the school Eliott was attending, which he got the address from Imane. He’d have to thank her properly the next time he’d see her.

He had thought about going in the afternoon at first, but he had barely slept that night and every passing minute made it less bearable. He wanted to talk to Eliott and know. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to know exactly but he was sure he needed to confront him.

Lucas tried not to feel too out of place in this gigantic room. Finding the exhibition room had been easy, signs were showing the way from outside the school already. Lucas followed them and other people to a big room with glass doors and big windows. Paintings, drawings and photographs were hanging on the walls. There weren’t enough walls apparently because panels had been installed and more creations were hanging from each side of them. There was a lot to see and a lot of people were there already. If he had to guess, it mostly looked like students, parents and teachers. He couldn’t see Eliott in the crowd though.

Trying to blend in, Lucas started walking around the room and looked at these students’ creations. He wasn’t big on art, wasn’t able to differentiate one painter from the other, except maybe Picasso, so the only thing he could note was that those people were talented and their images were beautiful. He did like some more than others but he couldn’t explain why, it was just an objective feeling. He also noticed the students’ names under each creation. It seemed that all of one person’s work was exhibited around the same space. So if he found Eliott’s name, he most probably would find the guy too.

He ended up finding his work. It was mostly drawings and a few photographs. Apparently, he was fond of city views and animals. There were a few portraits too. Lucas focused on the drawings of cartoon animals. It wasn’t the kind of things he expected to see in an art school. He always saw these schools as very elitist, showcasing magnificent paintings and spitting on those who did art just for fun but those cartoons apparently had their place in an exhibition.

It was cute, like a story unfolding in front of him. At the beginning, a raccoon was closed on himself and as the illustrations went on, he ended up opening more and other animals joined him on each illustration while some others left. On the last panel, a hedgehog had joined the party and, while the other animals were dancing and having fun around them, the racoon only looked at the hedgehog.

Caught up in his observations, Lucas completely forgot why he really was here for. He took a few steps back from the drawings and looked around himself. His heart was beating fast, he hoped to see Eliott but he still wasn’t there.

Disappointment settled in his stomach and he stepped back to the windows. Staring outside, Lucas wondered how long he should stick around to see Eliott finally arrive. He couldn’t leave without getting an answer.

Another fifteen minutes passed, Lucas took a glass of orange juice from the buffet in the corner of the room and stuck around the space where Eliott’s creations were exhibited. That’s when he saw him finally come in. He seemed to be in a deep conversation with some older guy, a teacher maybe? So Lucas waited until Eliott would notice him or until he’d be free to talk.

It didn’t take long for it to happen, the other person waved at him and started walking away from Eliott.

They were still several feet away and quite a few people wanted to talk to Eliott so Lucas waited for his turn. He was growing nervous with every passing minute. What was he going to do? To say? Should he get rid of the empty glass in his hands? Probably. That’s what he did and the second he looked up, he locked eyes with Eliott.

He still wasn’t sure what he expected but it certainly wasn’t the look of terror that he could read on Eliott’s face. Someone tried to talk to him but he said something. Lucas is pretty sure he read “Excuse me” on his lips as Eliott started walking to the entrance of the room. Just when he reached the door, Lucas got some senses back and started running toward there, getting a few annoyed glares.

“Eliott!” He called as he reached the doors but Eliott wasn’t anywhere in sight. Lucas looked outside but there was no one. The corridor opened on two hallways and three staircases, Eliott could have gone anywhere. “Shit.” He muttered.

He’ll come back, right? He has to, he’s part of the exhibition too, Lucas was pretty sure they would do a speech about all the students at some point. So Lucas decided to wait here for Eliott to come back. He couldn’t avoid Lucas if he was here and if Eliott wanted to go back inside he’d have to pass by him.

It sounded like a perfect plan until his phone buzzed in his pocket.

Lucas took his phone but he kept glancing up, never keeping his gaze for more than five seconds on the screen so he’d be sure that Eliott wouldn’t just walk past him. It was a message from Eliott. Lucas’ breath got caught in his throat, he forgot to glance away from his phone as he read the words. If he still had an ounce of hope, it had been crushed with just a few words and suddenly Lucas’ eyes were stinging with tears and his heart ached in his chest.

> **Eliott (10:14am)**
> 
> Leave me alone. This whole thing was a mistake, we’re better off without the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof that's a hard one Eliott... But what happened on his side?
> 
> Hope you liked this chapter as we're getting closer to the end  
> Comments and kudos make my day!
> 
> As always, find me on [tumblr](https://diablots.tumblr.com/) if you want to chat 😊


	9. I'm not leaving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your feedback on the last chapter! And I'm sorry for the hurt it caused some of you. Here's the next chapter with the answer you're all waiting for: why did Eliott do that??
> 
> Hopefully you'll like it, don't hesitate telling me about it 😊
> 
> As always, find me on [tumblr](https://diablots.tumblr.com/)!

After getting that text, Lucas walked out of the school and went back home. He kept his emotions at bay and once he got there he didn’t even have the courage to walk upstairs to his room, simply plopping down on the couch. He grabbed a cushion and held it close to his chest while his eyes filled with tears. Reading the text again, he realised he didn’t even get to explain anything, didn’t get to have an explanation from Eliott either. He just got full on rejected. How was he supposed to deal with that?

Lucas, who has always been wary about any kind of relationships, had been ready to throw himself in this adventure only to find out he was the only one of the two who wanted it. He had been given two weeks of hope, finally believing that destiny had been kinder on him than it had been on his parents, but it all crumpled down again in just a matter of seconds. He had been such a fool.

He noticed he had started sobbing when Ouba hopped on the couch and tried to make her way against him. He looked down at her, seeing her fur blurry because of the tears and let go of the cushion to welcome her in his arms. “I’m sorry, Ouba, you won’t get to play with. I know you got along, but he doesn’t want to see me anymore. I don’t know what I did to screw it up or if it’s even my fault but it happened.” He barely managed to utter all this, hiccupping every two words and Ouba replied with a whine, nuzzling her head against Lucas’ chest. Lucas ran his hand through her fur, petting her as he tried to calm down.

He wasn’t lying when he told himself that he never felt that way with anyone and, if anything, his reaction right now was further proof. All in all, he and Eliott hadn’t done so much. They hung out twice, kissed briefly once and texted a lot. He had done more with other guys and letting them go had never been a problem. But he had grown attached to Eliott at light speed and imagining that he didn’t want him was breaking Lucas’ heart.

It had to be him. Eliott had to be his soulmate, his reaction wouldn’t make sense otherwise. But Eliott didn’t want him, he never thought it was possible for someone not to want their soulmate. Eliott didn’t want anything serious and that had to be the reason why he pushed him away. But was he aware that Lucas was his soulmate? He didn’t know if Eliott started aging when he did too. After all, Eliott was still young and when people are young, it doesn’t happen all of a sudden.

He sobbed quietly at the thought of losing his soulmate and tightened his grip around Ouba slightly. So he was back at square one, what he had wanted to do when Imane told him about the discussion between Eliott and his brother: not moving from the couch for the whole weekend.

He ended up moving for the bare essentials. He took Ouba out on the shortest walks they had ever taken, which displeased her immensely. He ate little bits of what he had around, bread, cereals, ham, anything which didn’t require cooking. He also moved from the couch to his bed at random times, following the sun movements.

By the end of the weekend, he wasn’t even sure he felt sad anymore. He just felt numb.

¤¤¤¤

On Monday morning, he was sure he didn’t feel good enough to go to class so he stayed home. He didn’t reply to Yann either when he asked him on Tuesday why he hadn’t been there for lunch. He should have guessed that the reason his doorbell rang that evening, once, twice, three times and then didn’t stop ringing until he went to open, was because Yann had decided to come over to his place and see what was happening for himself.

He wasn’t in any shape to see him and he knew he’d get lectured because of it. What he didn’t expect though was to see Arthur and Basile alongside.

“They insisted on coming too.” Yann told him when he noticed Lucas’ annoyed gaze.

“We’re your friends too, we worry.” Basile had offered as an only explanation.

Lucas simply sighed and moved back to the couch. A few blankets were scattered on it and on the floor, a pillow was there too and Ouba was hiding in the middle of the mess. Without a word for any of the guys, Lucas laid back down on the couch and under the many covers. There was no point in pretending, anyway, right?

“Before you ask, it’s Eliott’s fault. No, I don’t want to talk about it. No, I won’t do anything stupid. Yes, you can leave.” Lucas ended up being quicker than any of them as they were still taking in Lucas’ and his living room’s state.

Although Yann wasn’t a stranger to this, Arthur and Basile had never seen Lucas at his worst. That didn’t put them off though and, as Arthur sat down at Lucas’ feet, Basile knelt next to the couch and Yann took seat at the edge of it, on the armrest.

“Lulu, what happened?” Basile asked in a soft voice. Lucas just realised how close they were to him now and how they cared about him too. He’d only heard Basile be this concerned and serious when it was about Arthur.

If anything, the caring in his voice made him choke out a sob after which he felt a hand on his leg and one in his hair, stroking gently. “It’s stupid.” He let out.

“Clearly it’s not.”

It took Lucas a few more minutes and some more comforting touches until he decided to talk. “It is stupid. Eliott and I, we barely know each other. We’ve just kissed once I shouldn’t… I shouldn’t feel this bad.”

“What did he do?” Yann wondered. Last they knew of, he still hadn’t replied to Lucas’ text.

So, Lucas explained everything, his discussion with Imane, the exhibition on Saturday and finally the text Eliott sent him as he was hiding somewhere in his school, simply waiting for Lucas to leave. His explanation was followed by an eerie silence during which all of them might have been trying to find the right words. It just made Lucas sigh deeper and hold onto the covers a bit tighter.

None of them commented on how stupid it was to be heart broken by a boy who he only just met and kissed once but that didn’t stop Lucas from repeating it in his head. What was wrong with him?

“Lulu.” Yann was finally the first to talk. He was sure Lucas was listening even though he wouldn’t meet any of their gazes. “The reason you feel so much so soon is because you’re old.” He seemed really sure about what he was saying and Lucas took a peak out of the covers to study Yann’s face. He looked at him with a raised eyebrow before continuing. “I’ve been there like, a month ago. When I met Sarah, I couldn’t stay away from her longer than a day because I was just so hooked. So it’s not stupid to feel like that after Eliott pushed you away.”

“He can’t be my soulmate though. He wouldn’t reject me if he was.” Lucas pointed out. His voice was unsure and weak as if he wasn’t sure he wanted to believe Yann.

“Maybe there’s a reason.” It was the first time Arthur interfered in the conversation. He had just been quiet until now, hand resting comfortably on Lucas’ ankle, thinking about what he was hearing. “Look, you said you haven’t talked to him. You don’t know what happened. One day you’re kissing and the next he pushes you away. Maybe it’s just because he’s an asshole or maybe it’s because something happened.”

“Yeah. Yeah it makes sense.” Basile nodded and turned back to Lucas after looking at Arthur while he spoke. “And, if there’s something, the only way to know is by confronting him.”

“I tried that already, guys. It didn’t exactly go the right way.” Lucas was glad for them to be here but they were making less and less sense even though they kept repeating it was logical.

“Then do it somewhere he can’t run away. Demand that explanation.” The three boys seemed to agree with each other.

“No cosmic entity is going to come and tell you he’s the right one. You have to believe it in your heart. Do you know why people don’t age until they find their soulmate? Because if we did, then there would be a chance of never meeting the person we’re supposed to spend our life with.” Wiser words had never been spoken by Basile. Not that Lucas knew of at least.

“Do you think it’s him, like really believe it?” Lucas eyed Basile warily but ended up nodding. “Then that’s all you need.” He promised him with a reassuring smile. It was the first time for a few days that a smile, no matter how small it was, appeared on Lucas’ face.

“It would be fun, wouldn’t it?” Lucas’ eyes flickered to Yann who started talking. “If we went through all those years together and ended up finding our soulmates at the same time.”

Lucas only reaction was to chuckle. It’s true, it would be fun and a really big coincidence.

Sitting back up, Lucas reached for his phone. He wasn’t sure it was a good thing but his friends’ speech gave him some hope again. Or at least enough courage to not let Eliott go so easily, to fight back. Still not uttering a word, he wrote a quick text under his friends’ gazes, who were probably wondering what took him.

> _Lucas (4:46pm)_
> 
> Would you happen to know where Eliott lives?
> 
> **Imane (4:52pm)**
> 
> Why?
> 
> _Lucas (4:53pm)_
> 
> I would be really grateful if you didn’t ask questions.
> 
> **Imane (4:55pm)**
> 
> I don’t know what’s happening but when I told Idriss why I needed Eliott’s address, he seemed to approve so go for it.

Imane sent another text with the address and another smile appeared on Lucas’ face.

“You got it?” Yann asked as he saw Lucas stare at his phone, satisfied.

Lucas got up and vaguely answered before going upstairs. He couldn’t exactly go to Eliott’s place like this. He hadn’t changed clothes in days, hadn’t taken a shower either, he was a mess. He needed to make himself presentable before facing Eliott.

It had never taken him so little time to look more like himself, barely 15 minutes had passed and he was showered, dressed, hair styled and eyes shining, ready to seize the rest of the day and find Eliott.

“Can you guys look after Ouba? Take her out? You can even stay here if you want. If this goes well, I don’t know if I’ll be back tonight. If it doesn’t…”

“It will.” Arthur assured him before he got time to continue.

“If it doesn’t.” Lucas repeated, watching them. “I’ll need you here. Yann I know you have the keys, you were ready to barge in if I didn’t answer the door. There’s pizza in the freezer and beer in the fridge. Make yourself at home.” The end of Lucas’ speech was more frantic as he put his shoes and jacket on. He vaguely heard a “good luck” before he shut down the door behind him. He hesitated for one second. No turning back anymore, he decided, and took the stairs, feeling too fidgety to wait for the elevator.

It turns out Eliott lives pretty far away from Lucas’ place. And the traffic is terrible. He remembered his discussion with Eliott about taking the car instead of the metro and, at a red light, he curiously looked at how long it would have taken him if he had taken the metro. 20 minutes by metro. 35 minutes by car. Ha! It wasn’t that much of a difference. He could brag about it to Eliott. But still, he would have been there 15 minutes earlier if he hadn’t taken the car. And he’s sure that these red lights were playing with his heart because it just wouldn’t turn green.

Finding where to park his car had been terrible too because he didn’t have a dedicated spot like he had at his flat. He actually had to turn around in the street until he found one at a five minutes’ walk from Eliott’s flat. If life was trying to get him to stay away from Eliott, it wasn’t working. He probably would have gone even if he had lived two hours away and with a car accident slowing the traffic down.

Finally, he was there. Finally. He stood in front of the door and looked for Eliott’s name. Demaury, flat 5. Easy. But he couldn’t ring, Eliott would ask who was there and then he would have the possibility not to let him in, Lucas wouldn’t let that happen. So he stood there, until someone came in or out. An old lady eventually did come out, putting an end to his restlessness, and, as he held the door for her, he managed to get in quite easily.

Flat 5, no turning back, he reminded himself as he took the stairs up until he saw the number five on one of the doors. Lucas rang the doorbell and waited. The moment between ringing and the door opening was long. It was always hard to know when it was acceptable to ring again. Lucas brought his hand up, wondering for a second if maybe he just wasn’t there but before he had time to think further, the door opened.

“Lucas?” Eliott was standing there, a surprised look on his face.

Before he had time to say anything, Lucas stepped one foot between the door and the doorway. Maybe it was a little bold and paranoid but he didn’t want to risk Eliott closing the door on him. “We need to talk.”

¤¤¤¤

Lucas was standing in the middle of Eliott’s living room, arms crossed and looking at Eliott expectantly while the man was just blatantly ignoring him. He was leaning against the wall and looking through the window. Lucas didn’t know if it was because he didn’t want him here, didn’t want to look at him or if it was because he was trying to find words. They stood like that for several minutes until Lucas had enough of it.

“I hope you realise I’m not leaving until you explain yourself.”

“What is there to explain?” Eliott’s voice felt distant. Lucas heard him just right but the way he had said it, made Lucas feel like he wasn’t welcomed anymore, like there was something wrong and Eliott was trying to keep Lucas away.

“You’re kidding, right? If you didn’t want to see me anymore, you should have said it to my face, not go hide in your stupid school and send me a text like a coward.” Lucas’ words were harsher than he intended but seeing Eliott so indifferent when they were standing merely a few feet apart was killing him.

“I couldn’t say it to you.”

“Because it’s false or because you think you’re too good to grace me with an explanation?” The longer Eliott avoided looking at him, the angrier Lucas was getting. The man he had started to get to know at his place, the one full of joy who played with Ouba, wasn’t there. Instead, a dull version had replaced him. One who apparently couldn’t face the consequences of his act.

“Were you planning on ghosting me the whole time? Do you think it would have made me disappear from the face of the Earth? Because last I remember, the only reason I got an actual answer is because I came to confront you. I’m a grown man, Eliott, if you don’t want me I can handle it.” He couldn’t. He really couldn’t but Eliott didn’t need to know that. He needed to know Lucas didn’t like how he treated him and that he was still waiting for a sign that what they shared had been real.

“It’s not that easy!” Eliott replied fiercely. Finally, he looked up at Lucas and he almost thought he could see hurt in his eyes. Almost started believing his words actually had an effect on Eliott. He was now standing tall, reminding Lucas of their height difference and, if he hadn’t been so angry, he probably would have thought about how well this body could feel around him, encircling him fully.

“It is.” Lucas said, not deflating. “I’m here, all here and I enjoyed the afternoon together so if you want to see me again it’s that easy, you tell me. And if you want me to disappear from your life it’s just that easy too. But I need to know, I need you to tell me.”

“You can’t understand.”

“Try me.”

They stared at each other. Those eyes were the first thing Lucas noticed when he met Eliott but now they weren’t shining like they did that evening. It was as if Eliott had renounced to it. He was the first one to look away, staring at the wall behind Lucas instead. His jaw was tightly shut to the point that Lucas could almost see it tremble. There had to be something Eliott wasn’t telling, he couldn’t be that angry just because Lucas was confronting him with a choice he made in the first place. When Eliott showed no intention in talking again, Lucas sighed.

“Look, it’s stupid but I think you’re my soulmate.” Lucas had wanted to sound more confident when he would say those words but he couldn’t see himself state firmly that it was the case when Eliott barely looked at him. He did notice, though, the way Eliott grasped one of his hand with the other after he said that. “The morning after we kissed, I woke up with this.” He pointed to the corner of his eyes where the wrinkles hadn’t faded or changed. They were still there and looked exactly like what Lucas thought they were that Sunday morning. “But that’s not what’s making me say it. Yes, that’s a sign that I met my soulmate but what makes me say it’s you is how good I feel when you’re around. I could see myself spend endless time with you. It just feels right.”

“You must be a fool to believe we can be soulmates.” Lucas had expected to hear something like this but he thought it would be said in a hurtful tone, in a way which would make Lucas want to back off and run away from Eliott as far as possible. But no, Eliott’s voice sounded resigned.

“I’m not. I’ve been around for a long time, you’ve figured that out now and during all those years I’ve never felt like that. Falling hard and fast, it’s something special.”

“You don’t get it, it’s not possible. I’m sick, Lucas. I can’t find my soulmate.”

There it was. Lucas didn’t get how being sick was supposed to put a stop to finding your soulmate though but he didn’t have time to say anything as Eliott continued. He seemed to gather some courage, clutching his hands against his stomach and taking a deep breath.

“82% of mentally ill people never find their soulmate. It’s a fact.”

“Then you’re part of the 18% left.” Lucas assured him, a small smile forming on his lips. He didn’t quite register the information fully but he knew that wasn’t going to repulse him. Eliott was still Eliott. “I’m aging Eliott, I can feel it in my bones, in my soul. I’ve never felt something so exhilarating and if you’re feeling even half of what I do then you must know it means something.”

Now that what Eliott seemed to consider a bomb was out, Lucas took a few steps toward him. The movement made Eliott tense and his eyes fled up to Lucas’. “And for what matters, I believe those percentages are fucked up or completely outdated.” Lucas assured him.

“It’s no fun being around me, you’re going to grow tired. You don’t know what you’re talk-“

“Shut up.” Lucas had stopped Eliott midsentence a little more harshly than intended. He breathed out softly and looked at Eliott again with a small smile. “Did I ever talk to you about my parents?”

“No?” Eliott’s voice was unsure, just like he had been since Lucas arrived.

Lucas took the last step he needed to be close enough to Eliott to pull him along. He took hold of his arm and moved Eliott to the couch until he was sitting next to Lucas. They were tiptoeing around the other, both unsure about what the other’s next move would be.

“My parents weren’t soulmates. My dad lost his when they were still young and he met my mom a few years later. She hadn’t found hers yet and they fell in love. They had a kid. It sounds like a nice story, right? My dad found love again, against all odds. Except my dad was an asshole. When I was in my twenties, he couldn’t deal with my mom’s craziness anymore, his words, not mine. She was ill too and he sent her to a hospital.” It had been a long time since Lucas told this story and a lot of conflicted feelings grew in him thinking back on it.

“Do you know how they treated mental illnesses in the 70’s?” Eliott was listening to Lucas with interest and when he talked about the 70’s his eyes widened slightly. Lucas didn’t give too much thought about it and, as Eliott shook his head slightly to answer the question, he continued. “Me neither. Because I was angry at him and, thus, at her. I lost 30 years with her because I was too much of a coward to face her or him. When I saw her again, at my dad’s funeral, I realised how stupid I had been.”

Lucas made a pause in his monolog. He looked up at the ceiling to keep the tears welling in his eyes from running down his cheeks. He cleared his throat so he’d manage to keep going. “After that, I moved her to a specialized institution, one which would treat her right. And I spent some of the most amazing years with her until she decided it was time for her to move on. So I know what I’m talking about. And if anything, I think you should show people like my father that they are wrong. That mentally ill people can lead a life with a soulmate without being stopped by some connection in their brain that is different than others.”

A heavy silence fell between them. Lucas took the opportunity to press his hands over his eyes, a few tears had ended up falling from them and he sniffled quietly. He hadn’t wanted to tackle that subject right away but if it was what Eliott needed to hear, it was worth it. Eliott was looking right at him, processing everything he had heard. Lucas could see it happen as his whole posture relaxed and his eyes grew softer.

“I’m sorry, Lucas… Sorry I assumed and sorry that happened to you.” It wasn’t much but Lucas would take it, it was a step toward him.

“Don’t be, it’s all in the past. I don’t want you to pity the miserable life I had until now. Because that’s what it was, even though I had happy moments, it was a miserable life. Until I went to uni again. Until I met you. You don’t realise how much you changed my life. How better you made it. I want you in it and I won’t push you away for something you can’t control. That’s who you are and I accept all of you. That is, if you’ll accept all of me.”

Lucas didn’t look at Eliott as he said that. Shyness took over him as this was it. It was the moment Eliott could change all of his life in a good or in a bad way. He had expected to hear Eliott say something but instead, he felt a weight on his leg. He moved his eyes from the floor to glance at Eliott’s hand that was now resting on his thigh. Except Eliott’s hand looked… old.

“I truly did not believe I would meet you and especially not that early in my life. But on top of that, I didn’t want you to have to handle me. I didn’t want you to believe you had to care for me just because we’re supposed to end up together. And then, on Sunday, I woke up and my hand was all wrinkled but it didn’t make sense. I didn’t know what was happening to me.” Eliott finally said and Lucas’ eyes met his. “You’re not supposed to age that fast. I did feel everything you talked about earlier and I came to the same conclusion than you, although I had no idea how it was possible.”

“It’s because I’m older.” Lucas offered him as an explanation. “It happened to my best friend recently too, you know the one I told you about. When you’ve been around for some time, you suddenly get a sign of age so you wouldn’t miss the time you’re given with your soulmate. Apparently it works on the other person as well, no matter their age.”

Eliott stayed silent at that new information, looking at his hand. He could have been looking at its shape, the way it looks so much like an old man’s hand, wrinkled and veins more prominent. But he could also very much be looking at the way it rests on Lucas’ thigh naturally, like it’s meant to be there. His thumb slowly, tentatively stroking over Lucas’ jeans and Lucas gulped at the feeling. They hadn’t been that close since the kiss they shared. And it was the most perfect sensation he felt.

“I’m bipolar.” Eliott broke the silence again and Lucas moved his hand to rest it on Eliott’s.

“And I’m 68.”

“I imagined you way older. I thought I could say, hey, I know someone who’s 400 years old.” Eliott said and it made both of them chuckle.

“Sorry to disappoint.”

“You don’t. Never.”

With one more smile to the other, Eliott made the first move, leaning in to capture Lucas’ lips in a confident kiss, one which made Lucas feel safe.

¤¤¤¤

> _Lucas (7:03pm)_
> 
> I won’t be back tonight.

Lucas put his phone away as soon as he sent the text to the guys. He was sure he would get many questions but it didn’t matter at that moment. He turned around to face Eliott on the bed again.

After making out for a fair amount of time, they had moved to the bed for more comfort. It was easier to cuddle when they were both lying down, rather than awkwardly tangled on the couch.

Eliott reached out to push away some hair that had fallen in front of Lucas’ eyes and then let his finger linger on the side of his face. He had a bright smile that Lucas couldn’t help but mirror. It felt incredible to be this close to him and it sent all his senses on high alert.

He got goose bumps whenever Eliott’s fingers were on him, he could properly admire the depth of his eyes, hear the quietness enveloping them, breath in what he would refer to as Eliott’s perfume. Whenever their lips met, he could taste the urgency in which their body had to just be close to the other. Their bodies felt perfect together and it sent Lucas’ senses to another spiral of feelings.

Time didn’t matter anymore, it was Eliott and him in a bed, discovering the other under a new light, one they had been too shy to explore during their last encounter. If they discovered each other on a sentimental level at Lucas’ place this time it was all about physical discovery.

Hands in hands, lips on lips, legs tangled.

Their respective sweatshirts didn’t last long and found themselves crumpled on the floor.

Hands on chest, lips on neck, hips pressed against the other.

Neither Lucas or Eliott could tear apart from the other, there was too much to explore, too many reactions they wanted to hear over and over again.

Hands on hips, lips on shaft, mouth opened in a blissful moan.

They had found each other on every level.


	10. You belong in my arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, so here it is the last chapter. Wow, can't believe we're there already.
> 
> I had a lot to do this week and couldn't edit as much as I did on other chapters so forgive me if there are mistakes left (and tell me if you spot them so I can correct :) )
> 
> Get ready for one last ride, I hope you'll enjoy it!! ❤️

When Lucas woke up the next morning, he was painfully reminded of his situation. Painfully, because Eliott was sprawled all over him and the guy was definitely bigger and heavier than Lucas.

“Eliott.” Lucas muttered, trying to push him. It’s not that he didn’t like having Eliott all over him, it’s just that he was positioned in a way that made him uncomfortable.

Eliott didn’t move though, if anything, he held onto Lucas tighter, proving that he was awake already. “Pillow.” He muttered as an answer.

“Your pillow would like to breath.” Lucas let out with a chuckle.

At least that made Eliott move just so that he could look at Lucas. “I can’t let you go.” He said quietly to which Lucas replied with a soft smile, hand coming up to Eliott’s hair, stroking it gently.

“You don’t have to.” He assured him and, when Lucas nudged him, he let himself be moved this time. Instead, Lucas made them move so Eliott’s head rested on his shoulder and their legs were tangled. That way, Lucas could keep playing with Eliott’s hair and Eliott could still wrap his arm around Lucas.

None of them seemed to want to move, Lucas thought that if they stepped out of the bed it would all end. At least with Eliott against him, he could be sure he wasn’t dreaming, that Eliott did listen to him, he was with him and wouldn’t leave anytime soon.

Yet, he didn’t know what time it was and he knew he would have to leave eventually, it was only Wednesday. “I have class today.” He told him.

“Skip it.” Eliott’s answer came naturally, almost sleepily as if he had done that before without any remorse.

Lucas was about to retort that he needed to get his degree, wondering what if that day was the day teachers decided to give them essential knowledge for the exams. But before he could say anything, he remembered those last months. The way he had tried to work hard to fulfil his mom’s last wish but how the moments he kept in mind were the small ones which had little to do with studying. Getting Ouba, playing video games with the guys, talking to Mika, getting to know Eliott. Maybe one day of class didn’t matter all that much. Maybe his mom just wanted him to pursue happiness. So he smiled slightly and nuzzled his head against Eliott’s hair. “Okay.”

They woke up again, later in the morning. Or at least, Lucas woke up later and Eliott had disappeared. That was probably the reason he woke up, not having Eliott’s weight on him made him cold. “Eliott?” He called, not even expecting an answer.

In the end, he had to resolve himself to getting up. He grabbed sweatpants he could find hanging on the chair and stepped out of the bedroom. He toed quietly toward the kitchen where he heard some noise. He was almost expecting to find someone else, wasn’t Eliott living with his parents? But thankfully, it was only Eliott and him in the flat.

Eliott was standing in front of the toaster. Something was heating up and he seemed to be waiting, looking down at his hand. He hadn’t noticed Lucas enter the kitchen and Lucas didn’t want him to, he enjoyed just looking at him and wondered what he was thinking. He noticed Eliott was looking at the hand proving they were soulmates. Of course, he also noticed how Eliott was only wearing a hoodie with the zipper opened and how his hair was still ruffled from sleep. Lucas wondered how he had gotten so lucky.

He finally stepped closer, surprising Eliott by wrapping his arms around Eliott’s stomach. “Hey, no! I was supposed to bring you breakfast in bed.”

“Hm… I’ll take it here too, don’t worry.” He assured him, letting his cheek rest against Eliott’s back.

He felt Eliott sigh, the way his shoulder dropped and head hung low. “No, I was supposed to do it, to apologise.”

“Apologise for what?” Lucas wondered, stepping back so Eliott could turn and look at him.

“For the way I push you away.”

“But that’s all forgotten.” Lucas assured him. “And forgiven. I’m not going to dwell on the past week, I’ve done that way too much before. Now I know that I have you, it’s all that matters. Not the way fear made you act before.” Before Eliott had time to answer anything, he brought Eliott’s hand, the one with the wrinkles, up to his mouth and kissed it. “This, right here.” He said and then took that same hand to make it rest on the side of his own face, Eliott’s thumb brushing the wrinkles on the side of his eyes. “And this. Show there’s nothing to be afraid of anymore.”

Eliott didn’t move his hand away, he left it here and after looking at both of their old features, moved to stare into Lucas’ eyes. He had no word to give, none that he deemed enough right now, so instead he moved his hand until he was cupping Lucas’ cheek. He smiled simply and stepped closer to kiss Lucas.

Their lips met and the same feeling than the day before invaded Lucas. The feeling of belonging, of being at the right place and of never wanting this to end. Eliott pushed Lucas against the counter and both of his hands were now holding Lucas’ face while his own hands were travelling up Eliott’s back, under his sweater.

Their tongue met and the kiss became deeper, Lucas was craning his neck so he could feel more of Eliott and their bodies were flush against the other. It felt almost urgent, the way Lucas couldn’t get rid of the sensation. Eliott’s lips were soft against his and it didn’t matter how the counter was pushing against his lower back, the discomfort was well worth all the good feelings he got from having Eliott close to him.

Lucas’ arms, wrapped around Eliott’s back pulled him closer and just as one of Eliott’s hand was about to explore down Lucas’ chest, the bread in the toaster was ready, making the both of them jump in surprise at the sound. They stared at the object before looking at each other again. They laughed, happily and loudly and fell into the arms of the other. They hugged tight, their bodies’ almost making one considering how close they were and Lucas whispered. “Let’s get breakfast.”

¤¤¤¤

When Lucas and Imane stepped outside the library, the latter finally understood why her medical biology partner had been so enthusiastic during their study session. Here was Eliott waiting for them, leaning against a tree. His face lit up with a smile when he saw the two people walk out. Lucas wasted no time and almost ran to him, planting a brief kiss against his lips.

“I should have seen it coming, right?” Imane said, standing behind them.

Lucas turned around and, each with an arm wrapped around the other’s waist, Eliott chuckled. “I guess.”

“Well. I’m happy you figured your shit out and will let you two lovers alone.” She assured them but she quickly looked at Lucas with a serious face. “Don’t take that as an opportunity to skip our project. We need it done by next week.”

“Yes Ma’am.” Lucas made a salute at which Imane shook her head before walking away without any further word. “Okay, come on, the guys are waiting.” Lucas then said to Eliott.

After they had skipped school on Wednesday, Lucas had reasoned himself. He couldn’t stay in bed forever, especially since he was supposed to meet Imane on the next day. So he asked Eliott to meet him afterwards and, of course, the guys just kept texting him to know how it went. He figured the easiest way was to make them all meet. He didn’t think there was a thing such as too soon when it came to soulmates and he’d have to introduce them eventually.

Yann had offered to introduce Sarah to all of them officially too, even though Lucas had met her before. Lucas had a thought that Yann did it in order to lift the weight from him. It wasn’t them meeting Eliott, it was them meeting Eliott and Sarah and getting into this little group of friends. But even if it wasn’t the case, Lucas was still grateful Yann offered to do it at the same time.

The warm weather had appeared again and they had agreed to meet in the park. Lucas already thought it would at least be easier to disappear that way if he couldn’t bare being with all of them anymore. To be honest, he wasn’t sure why he was nervous but he figured it might be because he didn’t know how Arthur and Basile would react.

The fact that Eliott was just 21 when Lucas swore he couldn’t fall for someone this young played a big part of it, he was afraid they’d make fun of him when all he wanted was to enjoy the situation. He was still unsure about what he thought about all this.

In the end, and as Lucas should have expected, it went pretty smoothly. Yes, they did tease him a bit but it wasn’t too bad. They also immediately welcomed Eliott and Sarah, but Lucas wasn’t surprised. They were nice and open guys and, honestly, who could resist Eliott’s charm? Certainly not Lucas.

“Oh by the way!” Arthur exclaimed all of a sudden, grabbing his phone he had put on the grass. “I read something a few days ago but I didn’t want to tell you about it before being sure. Now that we don’t doubt Eliott’s and Lucas’ relationship anymore, I think it’s fair to say this article fit your situation.” He mumbled a few words as he looked for what he was talking about, Lucas and Eliott eyeing him curiously.

“There, you should have received it.” Arthur said and put his phone down again. Both Yann’s and Lucas’ phones buzzed. “Oh yeah, I mean, I read about Yann’s and Lucas’ situation.” He explained when Yann didn’t understand his involvement in this.

Lucas grabbed his phone and opened the article Arthur had sent him.

_Are you and your best friend soulmate?_

_With the many communication possibilities we have nowadays, it has become rare to grow over a certain age without changing physically but some people around us are still wondering when they’ll meet theirs. This article focuses on another study that many people have looked at during the last century._

_When people do get really old, they sometimes can pinpoint one constant element in their life. Most of the time that constant is someone. Studies show that when you’re not meant to meet your soulmate anytime soon, you’re brought to someone who is in the same case than you. Call it destiny, physics or bullshit but many testimonies show it does happen._

_If someone keeps coming back in your life or just stays in it and you’re both not aging, it could be your case. We interviewed a few people which you can look at in the video below. If some people end up marrying that person until they each meet their significant other, others stay simple friends, co-workers, flatmates. More disturbing yet, these people would meet their soulmate around the same time, a few weeks or months apart._

_There is no word set for them yet, anti-soulmate? Non-soulmates? These all seem negative though. Do you have a better idea how to call them? Make sure to check the video and tell us if you know people like that._

_Sources of the studies this is based for are linked below._

Lucas looked up at Arthur and then at Yann once he finished reading and only a few seconds later Yann looked at him too. “So we’re… meant to be too?” Lucas asked with a chuckle.

It made Yann laugh. “Well, it does sound like us.” He agreed.

Eliott, who had read over Lucas’ shoulder, kissed his cheek and whispered in his ear. “I’m glad you had someone around until now. I wouldn’t have liked it if you had to go through all those years completely alone.”

Lucas replied to it by taking Eliott’s hand. All those years he wondered what was so special between him and Yann that they would stick together no matter what and now he got the answer with a click bait article. He’d make sure to check the sources though.

It didn’t matter much now anyway because reasons or not, Yann and him stayed together until they both found happiness. Now, Lucas had Eliott but also Yann and Arthur and Basile. And Ouba.

¤¤¤¤

A week went by, Lucas and Imane finally presented their project, Eliott and Lucas spent as much time together as they could, they all hung out together again, things were definitely looking up for Lucas.

Eliott had asked if he wanted him to come along but Lucas had refused. He said it was something he wanted to do on his own. That one day, he’d bring him there too but today was just him and his mom. That’s how he arrived, alone, at the cemetery.

He knew the way to her grave by heart, he held a bouquet of flowers and when he arrived there, he cleaned the grave and changed the flowers before sitting in front of it.

“Hey mom. I don’t know if you’re a psychic or something but it’s thanks to you that I met my soulmate. If you hadn’t told me to study, I would have never met Eliott. Or, at least, I don’t see how I would have. I mean, I’m sure he would have found a way eventually because let me tell you, that guy, he’s the dorkiest sappiest guy I’ve met. He pushed me away at first because he was scared. I mean, imagine waking up with the hand of a grandpa when you’re 21, it doesn’t make sense. He was also afraid I would push him away because he’s ill. But I told him about you, I wouldn’t do to him what dad did too you, I’m better than him.” Lucas’ eyes looked up at his mom’s name on the grave.

“Now that he accepted that, he just can’t keep his hands off me and he keeps telling me how lucky he is and I think he might be too much at times.” He admitted, looking down at the flowers again.

“I mean, I’ve never been wanted that way. It wasn’t the same to be around you and Yann. Eliott, he’s extra. But it will be okay, right? If we’re meant to be, he’ll understand what to do and what not to do. I’m still learning not to freak out every time he does something a little too personal. It’s hard to let people in. I think he understands it.” It wasn’t the first time he came to talk to his mom here but it felt weird this time. Maybe it was because he was voicing all of this for the first time or maybe because it was something way more personal than what he had told her before.

“You’ll have to meet him at some point. I’ll bring him here, you’ll see he’s lovely. I’m sure you’re laughing from where you are. Your son ranting about a boy, it was the only thing you wanted. I’m… I’m sad you’re not really here to meet him, you’d have loved him, I’m sure. If only because he makes me happy. He does. I know it hasn’t been long but there’s this weight in my chest that I don’t feel anymore when he’s around. When he’s around, all those dark thoughts that surrounded my mind daily are kept at bay, they’re still here but Eliott makes them bearable.” Lucas had found his smile again. He looked around himself. There were very few people in the cemetery and Lucas was thankful. He couldn’t imagine if someone came to see a grave nearby. It would make him stop talking immediately.

“So, I guess I wanted to say thank you for everything but especially for pushing me to do something else. I also have to thank Yann too because without him I would have let go of the last string of hope I was still holding on. I don’t know how to explain that it went alright in the end. It could have gone wrong so many times that it would have made more sense but everything turned out to be right so… Yeah, thank you.” Lucas nodded to himself, he truly was thankful for what happened in the last months.

His life probably matches the current weather. It was warm, spring was on the way. The cemetery was full of trees and flowers, plants all around and birds were chirping. Lucas chuckled at the irony of the situation, spring is supposed to a reawakening, right? He never liked thinking of those clichés but it did fit with his life right now.

“Oh I’m doing well in biology too. Exams are coming up in a month but with the grades I have from in-class projects I shouldn’t fail. Although, I really don’t know what exactly I’ll do with a licence in biology. Everyone keep telling us there’s no job at the end of this. I guess I started over in the wrong subject. But it’s okay, I’ll manage, in the worst case I still have my knowledge in economy. It’s not the funniest subject but if Eliott is waiting for me at home at the end of the day then it would be worth it.”

¤¤¤¤

They were together. A couple. Or Lucas thought that’s what it was at least, he and Eliott hadn’t exactly talked about labels, they haven’t even voiced the fact that they were soulmates. The both of them knew that, they did everything a couple would do and texted whenever they couldn’t be together. So maybe it was stupid but Lucas felt like he needed a reassurance, needed to hear Eliott say, yes, we’re together, for the rest of our lives. Because now there was a rest of his life. Now he would get to live like everybody else, age through time, create a new family and finally have a taste of true happiness.

Lucas read many testimonies of people who found their soulmate, they all described it as a feeling they had never felt before, one they didn’t even know existed. They said it was something they couldn’t live without anymore, something that drastically changed their life. Lucas sometimes read other testimonies, of people who found their soulmate but also lost them for reasons they had no control over like car accidents or illnesses. They said it wasn’t possible to live anymore, that they had needed heavy help to go through it while some didn’t manage. There never was a reason to leave your soulmate willingly and Lucas felt that. He never wanted to walk away from Eliott. And although his rational mind told him Eliott would feel the same, he still doubted it, wondering if it was really the case. He had pushed him away before, maybe he’d do it again when his illness kicks in.

Lucas must have gotten lost in his thoughts, he does that a lot, because the next thing he knows, Eliott is barely inches away from him. “Earth to Lucas.” He’s saying with an amused smile. “Wow, I don’t know where you went but it was far, far away.” He said laughing.

Lucas stared at Eliott, his thoughts still at the front of his mind and this time he’s losing himself in those hypnotising eyes. “You’re my soulmate.” He said.

The amusement on Eliott’s face turned into a sincere smile and his expression softened at the words. “I am. And you’re mine.”

“Say it.” Lucas requested, one hand moving up to caress Eliott’s cheek with his thumb.

“You’re my soulmate.” Eliott repeated Lucas’ words almost solemnly and, by reflex, Lucas’ hand grabbed Eliott’s, the one that looked old and held it tight as a proof.

Emotions flooded into Lucas and suddenly tears gathered up in his eyes and his throat tightened. He couldn’t help it. Eliott almost looked panicked at that. “Hey, no, no, don’t you cry.” He said moving forward to hold Lucas’ face between his hands. He pecked his lips and a few tears fell from Lucas’ eyes.

“I’m happy.” He whispered against Eliott’s lips and although Eliott couldn’t understand how enormous this was for Lucas, how he had waited years, decades to feel like that, he still got that it had a bigger meaning. Eliott simply kissed him once more.

Suddenly, it was a broken laugh that left his lips, he was sure he looked insane, crying and laughing and just not realising how lucky he had gotten. “Fuck, Eli, I’m happy.” He said and this time he kissed Eliott a few times, on his lips, his cheek, his cheekbone, his neck. He settled there, hiding his face against Eliott’s neck and wrapping his arms around the boy’s chest. Eliott was quick to hug him back, wrapping his own arms tight around Lucas. He couldn’t believe his own mind for thinking he could keep that man away now that he had him in his heart.

“You better get used to it because I’m not going anywhere anymore.” A few words whispered in his ear were all Lucas had needed. He let out a happy laugh again but didn’t move, not wanting to break the bubble they were in.

“I wouldn’t let you.” Lucas assured him.

“I think it’s time to follow each other on Instagram then!” Eliott said excitedly. It sounded ridiculous that a social media was what came in his mind just as they teased each other but Eliott was already stealing Lucas’ phone.

Eliott had discovered his phone didn’t have a password, big mistake he had told him, and went through the applications. After a few seconds, he frowned. “You don’t have Instagram.”

“I don’t.” Lucas confirmed, retrieving his phone.

He wasn’t fast enough though, because Eliott took it back again and was opening the app store. “We’re making you one then.” He said, sure of himself.

“Eli, it’s useless.”

“Useless?” Eliott asked, looking up at him. “What’s useless is your understanding of social media. No, not useless, just nonexistent. You need to have Instagram if you want to me my boyfriend, non negotiable. That way you’ll like everything I post.”

And really, how could Lucas say anything against this. He didn’t even argue, just stared at him as he heard the word boyfriend. And, once again, he wondered how lucky he had become for this to happen to him.

Shortly after that, the app was on Lucas’ phone and Eliott was making him an account. He linked it with his Facebook profile, which he had at least but only because Yann had insisted.

“So what should we name you… @GrandpaLu, how does it sound?”

“Do you really have to relate everything to my age?” Lucas asked annoyed.

“Hey, it’s not something you can hide anymore, you know. Those little things on your eyes say enough. Plus, it’s fun. I like it.” Eliott said with a shrug.

He had a way of reminding Lucas of his age constantly, one that Lucas didn’t quite appreciate and even though he complained about it Eliott just kept making small references like this. He wasn’t sure if it was because Eliott enjoyed annoying him or something else but if that continued he’d have to have a serious talk about it.

“Come on, just write Lucas or something.” He said with a shrug.

“You think you’re the only Lucas in the world who wants an Instagram account? That name is already taken. Plus it’s just the username. I’ll put your real name too.” He assured him. Lucas only grunted once more and Eliott took it as an approval.

After that, Eliott made his mission to find a new profile picture. The one Lucas had on Facebook was outdated and bad, so he made Lucas pose in all kind of positions but he just didn’t seem into it.

“Lu, come on, you could make an effort!” Eliott complained after they spent half an hour only taking awkward pictures.

“I don’t like to pose! I’m bad on pictures.” Lucas complained. “I don’t like this.”

Eliott came to sit down next to him on the piano bench. “You’re not bad. You’re gorgeous. Believe me, many people will be jealous that I’m the only one who gets to touch you and I’m entirely grateful for this. You could look amazing on pictures but you’re just not in it. So shut up whatever is happening in your mind.” Eliott said that and taped Lucas’ head with his finger to prove his point. “And relax, smile.”

Lucas sighed as Eliott lectured him but didn’t say anything. He knew Eliott wouldn’t let go of him, especially as the boy got up again. He knew one way to make him shut up though, Lucas remembered, eyeing the piano. He smiled slightly. Maybe he could charm Eliott into forgetting that Instagram thing by playing the piano. So he did. He played what seemed to be Eliott’s favourite piece considering the many times he had asked Lucas to play.

It seemed to him that it worked because he couldn’t hear Eliott anymore. Nothing was shuffling around like when Eliott tried to find weird angles to take a picture of him. There was just the music.

When he hit the last note, he was much calmer and smiling softly as he looked at the piano. He then heard. “Hey, Lucas.”

He turned his head, a natural and happy smile on his lips, eyes sparkling slightly when he heard Eliott. It didn’t last long though, he saw a phone directed at him as Eliott very obviously took a picture of him.

“Eliott!” He immediately protested, getting up to snatch the phone from Eliott’s hand. “You really can’t let it go!” He said angrily before looking down at the picture.

Eliott was simply smiling softly. “This one is perfect, isn’t it?” He wondered and Lucas had to admit that yes. This one was perfect.

So they settled down on the couch and soon Lucas had a new Facebook and Instagram profile picture.

“Now we need to put a few pictures on it. Things that represent you and that will show your friend that you’re cool.” Eliott decided as he started thinking.

Lucas was back in his negative mood though, saying it didn’t matter, that no one would look at it anyway but Eliott wouldn’t let him get away with it. “Okay so, we need to take a picture of us, a picture of Ouba, some food probably, an artsy picture of your flat. Oh the view from your flat could be interesting too and a picture of you playing the piano. Oh wait I have one of that already.” Eliott finished with a mischievous smile. “You really thought playing would stop me from taking pictures, love?” Eliott asked, kissing Lucas’ cheek.

Lucas had wanted to reply something, be mad at him for taking a picture in such an open and vulnerable position but when Eliott finished with that nickname and a kiss, he couldn’t really do much. Eliott would always figure out how to make him quiet, unable to retort anything because of how Lucas felt for him.

He smacked Eliott’s arm as he looked at him. “Stop taking advantage of the fact that I love you to silence me!” He complained.

Eliott simply stared at him, it was his turn to be rendered silent and it only took a second for Lucas to realise why. “Shit, I…”

Lucas didn’t have time to reply anything though that he felt lips against his own. Eliott was kissing him, phone forgotten and an arm around Lucas’ waist to bring him closer. “I love you too.” He muttered before kissing him again.

It was harder to kiss when Lucas just couldn’t stop smiling so widely and Eliott pulled back to meet his eyes. They both looked as ecstatic as the other and Lucas let out a happy laugh. “I love you.” He repeated and so Eliott did too until they were kissing again.

Soon their kisses turned into a make out session, Lucas was straddling Eliott and his hands were already wandering under his shirt. Although Lucas heard Eliott let out a shaky breath, muscles contracting under his touch, he still felt Eliott grab his wrist to pull back. “Don’t think luring me into sex will save you from social media.”

“Are you refusing my touch?” Lucas asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No, I’m simply postponing it.” Eliott assured him with a wicked grin. “Don’t worry, as soon as those pictures are up…” Eliott’s hand wandered barely under Lucas’ shirt to tease at the hem of his pants but Lucas swat at his hand.

“It’s either that or the pictures.” He warned him but that didn’t scare Eliott. He simply grinned and muttered something before pushing Lucas off him. He was way too sure of himself for Lucas’ liking.

“Look! You have a like on your first picture already.” Eliott pointed out excitedly.

Lucas took his phone and frowned when he saw Eliott had posted his profile picture too. He clicked on the username and saw a selfie of Eliott among the other posts and rolled his eyes. “That’s you.” He pointed out.

“It’s still something! We have to add your friends.” Eliott tried to steal Lucas’ phone again but he was holding it too tightly.

“What’s that?” Lucas wondered. He was looking at a picture of a raccoon surrounded by numbers and thinking about a hedgehog. The animals looked very much like what he had seen at the exposition when he tried to confront Eliott.

“That’s us.” Eliott explained, looking over Lucas’ shoulder. He rested his chin on it and explained. “I had no idea how old you were, I literally imagined everything. I couldn’t understand why you were so embarrassed about it to the point of pretending you were 20.”

“And now that you know, what do you think about me being 68?” Lucas wondered. It was still a problem for him, he would probably feel out of place still, especially having someone so young by his side but he wasn’t going to complain about it.

“I don’t care.” Eliott told him. “I never cared, I was just curious but you could have been 20, 68 or 450 years old, I would have been attracted to you just the same. The only thing that matters is that you belong in my arms.” He pulled Lucas against him, making him sit between his legs and rest against his chest. “You belong, Lucas.” He whispered against his ear.

That seemed to do the trick because Lucas relaxed against Eliott’s chest, humming softly.

“So, that means I’m a hedgehog?”

“Yeah. Small, spiky and adorable.”

Lucas turned to Eliott, looking offended. “I’m not sm-.” He didn’t have time to finish his sentence that Eliott had put his hand over his mouth.

“You are small, spiky and adorable. I will not take arguments on this.” He said, flashing him a wide smile that he knew Lucas couldn’t reply anything to. Instead Lucas grumbled and turned back to rest against Eliott again.

Eliott finally managed to take hold of Lucas’ phone again and went through his gallery. “You know. I can’t believe that, with all those pictures we took of us, you still haven’t changed your background.”

Lucas rolled his eyes. “I don’t need to have you as my background to know you’re here.” He argued but Eliott was already changing his lock screen picture.

“It’s so you remember me when I’m not here and so everyone know you’re taken.” Eliott said and put a hand over Lucas’ mouth again before he had time to retort anything. “No objections.”

Lucas didn’t have any objection. Well, maybe he did and he would have definitely said something if Eliot hadn’t stopped him but there were worse conditions than seeing Eliott every time he wanted to use his phone.

Once Eliott had added all of Lucas’ friends, every single person he had met even only once and after he posted pictures of Lucas at the piano, of his flat, of Ouba, of the view from his flat and of them, Eliott finally let Lucas reclaim his phone. Too curious, he went through Eliott’s profile again and saw a picture that wasn’t there before. When did he even have time to post something when he was busy with Lucas’ profile?

He clicked on the picture to see it bigger and immediately saw the caption. ‘Him’. It was a close focus on an eye, Lucas’ eye, with an emphasis on the side of it where you could see his wrinkles. Lucas double clicked to like it, as Eliott had taught him and looked up to watch Eliott’s reaction. A wide smile stretched on his lips and he looked up at Lucas too.

“Give me your hand.” Lucas requested, reaching out for it. At Eliott’s confused expression, he explained. “If you’re having a picture of me like that, I’m getting a picture of your hand.”

Eliott finally understood and reached his hand for Lucas to take. He intertwined their fingers and made sure the wrinkles on Eliott’s hands were visible. Finally, he posted his first picture himself on Instagram, a picture of the person he knows will never leave him, and he captioned it just like Eliott did. ‘Him’.

¤¤¤¤

Lucas looked fondly at his background picture. Not the locked one because Eliott would never let him change this one and he didn’t want to anyway. The one on his home screen that Yann, Sarah, Eliott and Lucas took a few days ago where they each showed their odd particularity. It’s true that it was something unusual, four young looking people sporting different traces of age. Grey hair, wrinkles, old features. But most importantly, they knew that they were going to age normally now. Only with this little particularity that showed how fate always reunited people who were meant to be together, although in its own way.

Since Lucas and Eliott found each other, they were inseparable. Every weekend is spent at Lucas’ flat and sometimes, only sometimes, they grace the guys with their presence. The thing is, they had a lot to do to get used to the situation.

They are soulmates, yes, but their backgrounds still stick to them. Eliott has his fear of never finding someone who would accept him fully and Lucas has his fear of not fitting, of being too old for Eliott. They talk a lot, or Eliott does most of the talking and Lucas struggles with his words but they found a way to keep their relationship in balance.

When Eliott’s fear isn’t creeping in the back of his mind, he’s actually the cheesiest man alive and plans on spoiling Lucas with every fibre of his being. He’s happy, Lucas can tell and he can be sure of it considering how Idriss, Eliott’s best friend, as impressive as he can be, welcomed him with open arms. He also made them promise to talk about him at their wedding seeing as, if he hadn’t had a big party for his birthday, they wouldn’t have met. Lucas had blushed at the mention of a wedding and Eliott had just nudged him with a laugh saying they would have met under other circumstances, and that “it’s the point of it, you idiot”.

The door of the flat slammed shut and a ball of fur sprinted toward Lucas while Eliott called behind her. “Ouba! Ouba come back here you’re filthy, I need to clean your paws!” But it was too late and she was climbing on Lucas already, who was laughing.

“See! She doesn’t do that with me, proof that she loves me more than you.”

Eliott appeared in the living room and glared at Lucas. “She left for a walk alone with me. She loves me just as much.”

Lucas shook his head playfully and held her in his arms as he got up. Walking to Eliott, they managed to swipe her paws until she didn’t have dirt under them anymore and she mostly let them do it without much trouble.

“It doesn’t matter, as long as I love you.” Lucas assured him and Eliott greeted him with a kiss.

“Right, but I love you more.” Eliott retorted playfully, which made Lucas groan. He’d never let him win.

But Lucas did love Eliott with all his heart and more. He was happy, truly happy that he never let go of hope and that they finally found each other. It was all worth it in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I received a comment on the last chapter saying someone wanted to know Eliott's reaction to Lucas being married to a woman and I have to say I'm curious too...  
> So here's what I offer: In comments, tell me if you'd like to have a glimpse in those two lives and experiences and I'll write it! Please keep it with a logic of the setting, their age difference, the fact that they're soulmates, their own struggles... It doesn't even have to be just Elu, it can involve the others. I'll chose those I'm inspired by. I can't tell you when it'll happen, not anytime soon probably (unfortunately) but I'll keep it in my mind :)
> 
> Here's where I leave you for now. Hope you enjoyed the last chapter and the whole ride. Do tell me with comments and kudos if you did!!  
> And thank you to all those who left comments on the other chapters, every time I had a new one it brought a big smile on my face ❤️
> 
> And if you want to keep contact with me, there's always my [tumblr](https://diablots.tumblr.com/)


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